Love in the Time of Corona

19

So. I can say that days have almost felt like a cycle. I'll wake up, Mom will be downstairs toasting some bread, Kio trying to make me figure out how to tell Mom about Caden, and Dad, just trying to be supportive with no solid plan, unfortunately.


Like I said, I feel like as long I don't tell mom about Caden, everyday will feel just like a cycle of choking on food that I never wanted to eat. That one encounter with Caden just appears to me like a huge chunk of beef that is just stuck in my throat. As I continued living with that secret feeling settling in, like how I usually act up when I feel like there's junk that I'm struggling swallow, factors will be present for me to consider. Should I continue eating or not? Most of the time, I would just keep on swallowing until the other food in my throat would go down with it. However, even if we don't want to or asked for help, people will notice and try soothe your struggle. They'd hive you water to flush the food down, pat your back gently, etc. Sometimes, it takes a lot of time to just digest it in. That's the hardest part.



"Krystal."


"Kio."

"You might wanna come down and see who's been waiting for you." He sounded... okay. I don't see any mockery.  He seems very odd, I guess?

"Why?" Of course, I'd ask.



"Damon. Quick. Before they go and ask the sh*t out of him."

"I'll get ready." He nodded and so I grabbed a plain black sleeveless tank top and some printed harem pants. I immediately brushed my teeth and went down.







When I went down, I saw Damon sitting politely on our couch. He is very charming, as usual. I was about to grab his attention when I saw a familiar face too. It was Caden. Jesus. If my feet had a mind of its own, it would've ran its way to my room.



"Hey, you two." As soon as I opened my mouth and made a sound, everyone in the room turned to me. Mom and Dad with the teasing look, Kio unusually looking serious, Damon smiling, and... Caden, locking eyes with me.




"So, Krystal." Mom exclaimed. "I imvited Caden over to have brunch."



"And I worked with some stuff with Damon so I asked him to stay for a meal." Dad stated.



At this time, I honestly don't know what to say. Or do. God. I wish this is just some kind of dream.



"Right. Why don't we get the table ready?" I initiated, hinting that I don't want to be left alone in the same room.



Kio suddenly smirked and stood up, "We got this, Sis." He then pushes Mom and Dad towards the kitchen.




So I, left in the same room with my childhood friend and my ex, with no choice, just smiled pathetically.



---


In times of despair and difficulty, I would usually refer to Kio or my bestfriend Abigail, which, unfortunaly aren't available at the moment, so I guess have to deal with this, myself.


 
"So. I... am currently working on a project at school and I kind of need inputs. Are you guys cool with it, since the three of us don't really have anything to do?" I tried to sound as bubbly as I can and based on the reactions I'm getting, mostly by Damon, I think it's enough.

 
"Ask away." Caden said.


"Yeah, we'd be more happy to help." Damon smiled and it showed his adorable dimple.



"Okay. I'm gonna be asking you some questions and I just hope that you guys would answer with your raw personality." I stated.



I cleared my throat and took out my phone because usually, I would write down some questions that might be of help to my output.


"Okay. So first question, what is the stupidest thing that you've ever done just because someone dared you to?"

They looked at each other and finally, Caden said, "Go on, Dude. I'm still thinking."



Damon just shrugged and said, "I remember that during sophomore in high school, I kept a prank going on a certain person for the whole year and she ends up telling me and my stupid acts to the cops."



I was shocked. That was definitely not how I perceived him.


"What happened?" I got so invested that I wanted to know more.


"One questions at a time, ladybug." He winked playfully. Ttpical Damon.



I rolled my eyes and then averted my eyes towards Caden.



"How about you?" I asked, bluntly.






"Hmm. I guess when I dated a girl that I wasn't really interested to back in the days... 'cause she ended up breaking my heart." He cleared his throat and smiled devilishly. I almost reacted badly but seeing Damon in my peripheral vision, I just smiled.




"Ooh. Interesting." I just babbled. "Next. Uhh, if you're given a chance to say something to a person that you've been longing to talk to, what would you say?"



Damon was about to speak when Caden tapped his shoulder.



"Maybe I should first, this time."



"Oh sure, man." Damon submissively nodded.



"Okay. I probably start by asking her how was Korea and all the stuff that's been going on in her life." He paused. "Also, I would tell her that even if she chose to leave with no explanation or heads up, I would still accept her coz why not? We loved each other, didn't we?" He was so casual when said that, even if I know that what's the real tea behind every word he just said.



"That's very, very flabbergasting." I fake-typed some notes in my phone just to avoid eye contact.



"Wow. You're something, Caden. I wouldn't be able to do that kind of thing with a girl who broke me." Damon's really impressed, not knowing that the girl Caden's been murmuring about is just across his seat.



"Yeah, me too." I just seconded, though I remember Giancarlo. He lowkey broke me emotionally... though I know I deserved it.



"What about you, bro?" Caden is really nice to engage in a conversation with someone he really doesn't know and I'm grateful that he is.



"I...don't have anything. I never really leave things unsaid." Damon's just his casual lighthearted self. That's just good.




Somehow, as they talked to each other, I started to feel out of place, which is not a bad thing, may I say. I feel really comfortable with just observing.




"You." Caden called out, looking directly to me. "What's yours?"




"Hmmm. I guess, since he's not really from here, I can tell you guys his name." I smiled down. "Well, the only thing I wasn't able to say to Giancarlo was that he got me through things and I'm very thankful that he came into my life."

Damon looked intuitively and asked, "So, who's this dude? Where's he?"

I smiled widely, "You don't get to ask questions here."



"I thought so." He just shook his head smiling, a sign for me that he's given it up.



"Okay. I'm not really sure if we've still got a lot of time for this but I just wanna ask this last question. Will the both of still be interested in giving me inputs?" I put on my persuasive look and hoped for the best.



"Uh. Sad thing is I want to, but I can't. I'll be running the store so, got no time in my hands. How about Caden?" Damon uttered.



"I..." Caden was stumbling on what to say.



"Yeah, will you be busy? I really need.... respondents for this." I sound helpless but I guess I'm trying to take a little step so that I can digest whatever it is in my throat.



He shook his head a little and said, "Yeah. Sure. Why not."



"Great! Then, I'll be checkin if brunch is ready." I stood up and went to the kitchen, to see my mom dying, laughing silently.




"What?" I asked in my unusually high pitched voice.



"You are just so not good with talking, baby. You should practice. I'll call them, take a break."






I leaned on the kitchen counter beside Kio. "That's just the worst feeling."

"Probably not."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kio's been very odd.




"Not as bad as anyone else would be feeling, right now." He said, sarcastically and headed for his room.

What could I have done this time?