will you be mine

27

                                                                                       ARKS POV

The guests arrive one by one, everyone here from the band, roadies, our friends, family and anyone we have spent time with over the last 20 years. The house fills quickly , before long the party spills outside. It feels real now, the band is really over. It had been hard making the decision that i didnt want to perform anymore , i hadn't expected Robbii and Chad to feel the same. Ludo on the other hand had been adamant he wanted things to go on as they were. He wasnt ready for change, he still isnt now. Its hard knowing he isnt happy, knowing that im standing in the way of what he wants. I wish i could make him happy and just ut my own feelings and needs to the side but i cant, life is too short.

Ludo walks past me without a word as he arrives, i had expected it after our brief confrontation after the magazine interview. We had spoken once since when he confirmed that he was happy for the party to be held at my home, he had simply said yeah ies being decorated anyway before ending the call. Things have been strained between us for a while now, hes been my best friend since we were kids so i hope we can fix things before its too late.

I collect a bottle of water from the kitchen island as i pass ad move further into the party, i hadnt expected roses family to fit in as well as they had. They must have had  so much pent up frustration  that they just wet wild the first chance they had. 

Dianne and her fiance are taking shots with some legendary musicians, im afraid even Dianne wont be able to keep up with them

Hillary and her husband are sitting in the garden enjoying an intense conversation with Robii and Geri. Out of all the sisters Hillary is the most calm and laid back, unlike the rest of the Kline family they are simply sipping their drinks and are not downing it like they have been in the desert for days.

Mary is getting awfully close with Dean, i have watched them dance for a while now. His hands keep roaming up her body, her husband watches on but i cant tell by the look on his face if hes mad or not. I know if it were me and Rose was getting felt up by another guy i would go crazy.

Roses parents are in the pool swimming lengths with Maggie and her husband, i think their racing but who knows.

June is passed out on the sofa in the spare room, i dont think she even had three drinks before she became unsteady on her feet. Now i just need to find my girl, i haven't seen Rose for a while now. I search the home and stop in my tracks when i find Rose sat in the front yard with Ludo looking at the wild animals in the street. Ludo sits awkwardly with his hands on his lap as Rose rests her head on his shoulder. I stand and watch them for a while , i watch as they laugh and make inside jokes. Rose turns and smiles as she sees me, she beckons me with her hand. When Ludo sees me he starts to stand up before Rose grabs his arm.

"whats going on with you two" she asks, i thought she would notice.

"i dont know what you mean" Ludo shrugs, he doesn't look at me. 

I want to tell her that hes pissed at me because he cant handle the truth but instead i shrug.

"come on mate, we dont know when we will all be together again. Lets put the bullshit to the side and just celebrate"

"Your wrong you know, what you said. Your wrong" Ludo says quietly

Im not wrong, i know Ludo better than i know myself. I know im right but if he isnt ready to admit it i cant push him. When hes ready we can talk about it, ill be open and understanding well as much as possible given the circumstances.

"ok im sorry, i wont bring it up again" 

Ludo looks up at me, he doesnt look convinced. I stare back at him intensely until he finally gives in and smiles. I help him up and pull him in for a hug, Rose looks happier now. I wish i could tell her whats going on but its not my place to talk about it. 

"come on lets get you both a drink, theirs some dirty water looking punch in the kitchen that you will love" 

"oooh sounds fun, ill get us all a glass" Rose offers.

"it was too sweet for me, im still drinking water to get rid of the taste" 

Ludo and Rose follow me in to the kitchen and help themselves to the punch. Ludo pulls a face, Rose drinks its so fast that she doesn't compute how bad it tastes. 

The alarm on my phone notifies me its time to find an excuse to head to the bathroom, Rose gives me a strange look as look at my screen. 

"im just going to the bathroom" I dont wait for their responses, i head quickly to my room and find the pills i had hidden in the potted plant.

"Why are you stashing pills Noah"

Shit, she called me Noah. Im in trouble now.

"its not what you think"

Rose throws the soap dispenser at my head, it shatters into pieces upon impact. "oh so you dont have pills hidden in a plant, You didnt sneak in here so you could take them without anyone noticing"

"there multivitamins, i have taken 2 a day for the last year and a half" i hand her the bottle, she immediately opens it and looks at the pills. I can see that she's dubious, she doesnt want to believe that im lying but she doesnt fully believe me either.

I hand her my cell "look at the alarms"

"Multi vitamins, omega 3, Vitamin D and Iron tablets" 

"the only drugs i take are prescription or vitamins and supplements. Im not stupid enough to risk losing you not now. Not now were together again" Its not a lie but i am being purposely vague.

Rose takes a huge breath "i was so afraid, i thought i was going to lose you" 

"im not going anywhere, not yet"