will you be mine

32

It's so quiet, you could hear a pin drop. The staff from the helicopter company look away, I can see they feel awkward. I feel like hell, I know my answer is the correct one but I know how hard it will have been for ark to hear.

I finally look at him and he's stone faced, I cant read him. He quickly stands and drops the ring back in his pocket. I try to find the right words but I don't know what they are so we just stand in silent.

"we had better go" he doesn't wait for me to answer, he turns on his heel and walks towards the limo. I give the staff an awkward side smile to the staff before I head to the car. I sit by ark, he doesn't acknowledge me, he just stares out of the window.

"Noah"

His head whips around as I use his name.

"I love you, more than I could ever tell you. I'm just not ready for marriage, it's only been a few months. I swear theirs no one else I would rather marry, your the one for me"

His face softens at my words but I can see the hurt in his face. He nods simply and takes my hand in his.

The ride back to his house is awful, I can't stop worrying about how this will affect ark and his drug recovery. He has done so well but this could be all it takes to make him turn back to drugs.

.......

It's been 4 hours since ark left, he claimed he went to the gym but I don't know if I belive him. I ask to go with him but he states that he needs some time to himself.

After 2 hours I call his friends but none had heard from him nor did they know which gym he used. Ludo must hear the panic in my voice as before long he is at arks house comforting me. I'm great full for the company as my family have gone out to see the sights of Vegas.

Ludo makes me a large glass of wine and pulls me into him. I rest my head on him as he wraps his arm around me, he rubs my arm and tells me it will be OK.

"so why did he take off"

"because he asked me to marry him and I said no"

I can feel ludo still, he seems as surprised as I was. "he what"

"yeah I know, it's just too soon right. I mean I did the right thing didn't I"

"I can't answer that, only you know what you want. So he didn't take it well then"

I laugh but uts a painful laugh "yeah you could say that, as soon as we got back he said he had to go to the gym and I haven't heard from him since"

"he's not stupid enough to do drugs, he knows he will lose you if he does. He's a big boy, he will be fine"

I'm not so sure "you think"

"I'm only gone half the day and your already making moves on my girl" ark says with a forced laugh.

Ludo moves his arm from around me and suddenly becomes awkward. He must know that ark is just teasing him, everyone knows what good friends we are.

"hey I'd better go, I'm glad your OK brother" ludo nods at ark before he leaves.

"yeah ill see you tomorrow" ark replies almost coldly.

"what's wrong with you, why did you treat him like that. He didn't do anything wrong"

Ark smiles and shakes his head, and "your so niave"

"what do you mean" I argue.

"nothing, so are you ready to go out I'm hungry"

I try to start a conversation but he isn't in the mood, he's quiet and distant. He must have really pushed himself at the gym as he's so pale and lethargic.

"actually let's order in, I can't deal with people today"

"yeah if thats what you want, can we talk about this morning"

"Rose it's fine, I know it's too soon. I'm not mad or sad, well maybe a little but I understand. It just felt right at the time"

"so we're OK"

Ark smiles and nods, he seems sincere but still I worry. The worry must show on my face, ark gently cups my jaw and looks deeply into my eyes.

"babe I'm sorry about earlier I just needed some time to myself plus I had an appointment so I headed there after the gym, I didn't realise I would be gone so long"

"an appointment, is everything OK"

Ark is slightly vague as he answers " yeah was just a check up"

"and did it go alright, are you OK"

"yeah I'm good babe, don't you worry about me"

"ill always worry about you" ark kisses me before he places our order, he makes me feel like everything is back to normal. Maybe we can continue like this morning never happened.