Britten

CHAPTER 30

It was after seven when they got home and Milly already had dinner made. The guys attacked the food like they hadn't eaten all day. Britten laughed as they all piled around the extra table that was put out with piles of food on their plates.

Britten and Tallen went over to the main table and sat down with Orion's mom and grandparents. She made herself a small plate and they just stared. It was smaller than what she had been eating.

She wasn't really hungry, she was starting to get nervous. She started to wonder if she was doing the right thing. Is this what she really wanted? She knew she loved him, she felt that deep down. She began to think about what all bad things could happen and that made her pick at her food.

Robert grabbed a dinner roll and threw it at Orion. The guys laughed and Orion turned to look at his grandfather. He nodded towards Britten and Orion looked. He saw her sitting there pushing what little food she had around with her fork.

He got up and went over to her. She watched as he squatted down next to her. "You okay," he whispered. She gave him her fake smile and nodded. He sighed and stood up then offered his hand to her. She took it, got up then followed him out of the house.

"What's wrong honey," he asked as they sat on the front steps. The air was cooler and it made Britten shiver. He put an arm around her and rubbed her arm to try and warm her up. "Just not hungry."

"You haven't eaten since noon."

"Still full." He sighed and she looked at him. "What's bothering you?" She shook her head no. She didn't want to tell him about the doubts she was having. She didn't want him to know that she was scared, scared that everything was going to fall apart.

He sighed when she didn't answer him. "Britt?" A tear ran down her cheek. Her chest was hurting as she thought about all the bad things she didn't want to tell him about. "Honey, please talk to me." He wiped the tear away and she looked at him.

He gave her a small smile but more tears fell down her cheek. "Second thoughts?" She shrugged. She wasn't quite sure that was it. It was different. "Want Constantine?" She sighed and nodded. He kissed her cheek then got up and went in the house.

Constantine came out a minute later with her coat. He helped her slip into it then sat down next to her. "What's going through your head beautiful? You were happy earlier." She looked at him with tears in her eyes. "Am I making a mistake?"

"Do you truly love him?" She nodded and a few tears ran down her cheek. He smiled and wiped them away. "What's bothering you? What's making you think this way?" She looked back out at the yard and leaned up against him.

"You know I fuck things up. What if. . ." He hugged her tight and shook his head no. "You're not going to fuck this up. I have never seen you like how you are when you are with him. You're happy and I haven't seen that. . .this kind of happy I have never seen."

"Yeah, and what happens if I fuck it up? What if I end up doing something that makes. . ."

"Britten, calm down. You didn't make Giovanni turn on you, he was already that way, and Orion is not Giovanni. He's not going to turn out that way. You're not going to fuck anything up. He loves you for who you are, nothing less."

She was in a bit of a shock because he had actually called her Britten. It had been a long time since he had done that. She sat up and looked at him. He smiled and kissed her cheek. "Everything is going to be okay. You are going to be happy. You are going to have a normal life. You're going to be married and soon enough a baby. It's going to be the perfect life."