If only (trans reader x Peter parker)

(33)

peter lay still in bed. i smiled, watching him from the window sill. he sleeps so still, peaceful. he rolled over and stretched, getting ready to stand. "morning." i chuckled, putting my right foot down on the fire escape. he whipped his head around in confusion, smiling gently when he saw me. "may will freak out if she sees you here." he replied, sitting up and leaning towards me. "i know, let's stay quiet then." i replied, leaning inside to kiss him. "i missed you so much." i mumbled. "i missed you too. i was so afraid to hurt you when you were with cap." he replied, sitting up. i nodded, understanding how hard that must have been. "what say you i open a portal and get us out of here?" i asked, motioning towards the far northern lands. "may will kill me." he replied. "let's be back soon then. we'll be alone." i chuckled, cupping his soft face in my left hand. "god i missed you." i said, my voice trailing off as i woke up in my cell.

they had put my hands into special glove-handcuff-whatever the eff that kept my hands fisted so i couldn't open portals. i despised it here, i wanted to go home. every day here so far i've had a panic attack and been sedated and then been put in my room, repeat cycle. i barely ate which was fine by me, i wasn't hungry. i was scared, isolated, abandoned. again. what little time i spent awake was usually crying or still. my back had been messed up in the fight from peter throwing me away. they refused to let me wear my binder and they had me wearing a tight, short sleeved t-shirt. my scars were on view as was my chest. i have cried a lot in the past week. i missed home, peter, school. i had a plan to sneak out but i didn't think it would work, it was a long shot and i'd have to time it exactly right. there's one guard on security at night. he's a big bloke but he's a sweetheart. he uses the bathroom for 2 minutes every night twice between 12 and 4 AM. if i would be highly risky, dangerous, but it just might work. i looked around the room, at wanda, sam, scott. all of us that got caught. i just sighed and nodded at sam. i made a promise to get out, and i was going to keep it.

no.

matter.

what.

a/n: short chapter but it's just a quick catch up. i'll be posting the rest of this chapter later this week but i just had to leave you guys on a cliff-hanger this once. please don't hate me, it's gonna be good for the story, i promise! love you bugs, you're valid and gorgeous. happy pride month!