Fading Scars

Chapter 28

Emmie

"Emmie, wake up." I groan and turn over avoiding the voice waking me up. I pull the covers up to my chin and try to fall back asleep. "Emmie, you need to wake up. I brought you your breakfast, you slept in so you'll have to have your two meals closer together." I mutter something under my breath, I'm not ready to wake yet and I'm definitely not awake enough for food. "Emmie, I'm serious. Don't make me get Damon to drag you out of bed."
"I'm tired Stefan, why can't I sleep just a bit longer. Please," I don't open my eyes. I try to doze and Stefan pulls my covers down but it still covers my legs.
"I left you sleeping as long as I could it's 11.30 am. Come on Emmie, you need to be committed to this food plan."
I groan and sit up, I blink trying to adjust to the light. I try to cover as much as I can of my body with the covers. "Breakfast in bed, that's romantic." I giggle and Stefan's eyes soften. He probably expected me to be difficult.
He places the tray on my lap, "Porridge, fruit, orange juice and some milk." I look at it and I couldn't possibly eat all of this. "Don't be difficult Emmie. Eat what you can."
I take the spoon and slop some porridge on it, I slide the spoon in my mouth and I screw my face up. Not the best breakfast in the world. I put the spoon down and I pick at the fruit in the bowl.
"Nah uh, Emmie. You need to eat the porridge over the fruit." I look at Stefan and I poke my tongue out. "Emmie, you are always so difficult. I'll have to bring in my secret weapon. Porridge," he points at the porridge bowl as he slides off the bed. What secret weapon? I watch him as he leaves the room. I pick up the spoon again and I let the slop fall in the bowl off my spoon.
Who invented this? It's grim, I shove another mouthful in. Think about the positives Emmie, I need this. Damon enters the bedroom moments later and he shuts the door. His eyes fix on me and I keep the spoon in my mouth for a second until I figure out his game. He makes his way to me and he slides under the covers next to me.
Damon kisses my cheek and I put the spoon down. Playful Damon, my favourite. "Emmie," he warns. "Keep eating," he picks up the spoon and places it back into my hand. He looks at me imploring me to eat. I roll my eyes and do as I'm told, when the full spoon enters my mouth Damon purposely places his hand on my leg and I gasp. "You get distracted so easily, keep going or I'll stop. It's simple baby," my mouth drops open and look at his beautiful eyes. He raises his eyebrow to challenge me, "What's it to be, baby?"
I shut my mouth and start eating the rest of the porridge. Damon places soft kisses down my neck and I move my head giving him better access. I keep eating because I don't want him to stop. He grasps my neck with his right hand. Hmm, so close but yet so far. I smell him all around me and all I can think of is him. I hastily finish the portion of porridge and I gently place the tray on the bed. "No, baby. All of it, not just the porridge." I groan, I pick up the orange juice and I gulp it down. I was pretty thirsty, why do I have orange juice and milk?
I'm really too eager to finish breakfast to end the torture. I sip at the milk and Damon travels his hand up my leg. I spit the milk back in the glass, keep it cool Emmie. "Hmm, this is taking too long baby." Yes, yes it is. I grin and he grabs the glass from me and places it on the bedside cabinet. He grabs the tray and places it on the floor. I watch him as he stretches, he brings the fruit bowl and rests it next to me on the bed.
He kneels in front of me and I can't take my eyes off him. He grabs the back of my knees and slides me down the bed so I'm lying flat. He shifts his weight and pulls the cover off me completely. Damon crawls over me and places soft kisses over my jaw and he reaches my lips and I push him off. He looks at me confused, "I haven't brushed my teeth, Damon, that's gross." he chuckles at me and he places a piece of fruit in my mouth.
Whilst I chew he brushes his fingertips from my neck down my collarbone to my breasts. My hips flex at his sweet torture. I swallow and he removes his hand to feed me again. This is too slow, it's agony, I shift my weight and flip over so Damon is underneath me. I look down at him and I kiss his neck instead. "Oh baby, you haven't finished yet."
"Hmm, please Damon. This is all too much, I want you now." He places more fruit in my mouth and I grab his finger and push it in my mouth and suck.
"Shit, Emmie. How do you always turn this in your favour every time." I release his finger and eat the fruit that's in my mouth. I slide my finger across my lips in appreciation always looking into his eyes. "Okay, have it your way, baby." I grin and he flips me onto my back on the bed and he gets on top of me.
I grin knowing his plan backfired whatever it was. He removes my jeans and panties and he removed his jeans. "What am I going to do with you?" he says looking down at me and I giggle. He kisses me and I groan into his mouth. Well, I guess he doesn't care that I have bad breath. Damon slides into me and I clutch at his hips. I've been so uneasy and uncomfortable since Mr D. Sometimes I feel like he broke something inside of me. "You okay, baby?"
I nod, I am okay I just seem to need time to adjust. We lose each other once again. This chemistry is overwhelming, this connection has only intensified over the years. It's me and him for the rest of our days. I am in a really happy place and it feels amazing. I know that I will stay strong even when we return back to our life and Damon will always be at work. I'll just have to enjoy this time with him whilst I can even in this cold snowy country.
The next day I'm in the kitchen cooking breakfast for everyone. This is the Emmie I want to be. The one that provides for her family. I want to be the glue to the family. I want them to look to me when they need support. I cook pancakes and a cooked breakfast. I have to make it by the dozen with the amount of members in this family. Damon comes up behind me and wraps his arms around me whilst I'm still cooking.
"I've missed this." I look at him and frown, "I've missed happy, carefree Emmie." I push back against him and he pulls me tight to him and groans. "Now my wife is teasing me."
Someone knocks at the door so I turn the gas down and head to the door. I open it and see Damon's mother standing there. "Emmie," she says. She opens her mouth again and she looks upset. I don't wait to hear what she has to say and I slam the door in her face.
I walk back to the cooker and Damon looks at me suspiciously, "Baby, who was it?" I continue cooking without looking at him.
"It's for you," I mutter.
"You slammed the door when it was someone for me? Who was it?" I ignore him and he walks to the front door and opens it. "Mother?" he seems surprised. "I told you I didn't want anything to do with you anymore."
I don't hear her response but when I glance at the door she's walking in. I turn back from the door and continue cooking, "Emmie, I want to apologise." She's closer now probably behind the kitchen Island. "There is no excuse for what I've said and done to you. My husband is a cold bitter man, he never used to be. I suppose that's why I have been with him for so long. He used to worship the ground I walked on. But now he's spiteful, it was gradual so I never really saw it happening. I wanted to please him so I would make others around us feel bad."
I don't turn around, "He liked Izzy and Ellie so I went along with it. Emmie, you are exactly right for my son and I'm sorry for the pain I've caused you. I've left him, Emmie, you gave me the strength to say that I'm worth more. Your little outburst reminded me how much he's changed and I don't want to be treated like that anymore. Will you forgive me, Emmie? I want to be part of my grandkids lives if you'll let me."
"Emmie?" Damon prompts and I sigh.
"Do you want to stay for breakfast?" I still don't look at her this is the best I can do right now. It's going to take a lot more than that to build bridges. I would never let anyone make me cold like that.
"Yes, please. I'd like that very much."
"Why don't you sit down Mom?" I get ready to serve. I serve everything on a separate plate so people can pick what they want. I wouldn't want to overfeed or underfeed anyone. Or even put things on their plate they don't like.
"It's ready, everyone. Help yourself." I move out the way and sit on the stairs with Hero.
"Me first, I'm starving," Blake says and beats everyone to the kitchen. I roll my eyes. I feed Hero some bacon and he scoffs it down. Once everyone has taken their share Stefan comes over with a plate of food.
"You didn't give yourself a lot of option Emmie. This will have to do." I take the plate from him and I start eating what he's given me. He leaves me to eat alone. I watch my family eating their food and I smile.
Sully comes and sits next to me on the stairs. "You were nice giving her another chance." I shrug.
"I kinda get where she's coming from. A man you love making you into someone else. I figured I should give her the benefit of the doubt for now." I lean my head on Sully's arm and I zone out.
Over a week has passed and we are sat on the plane on the way home. I can't wait to feel the sun on my face. Stefan left Canada once he trusted me with my food plan. I am to see him when I'm back. I have to write down what I eat so he can keep track of how I'm doing. We finally got the all-clear to bring Hailey home.
It's been nice getting to know her and spending time with the kids. "Baby?" I open my eyes and I look up at Damon. I rub my eyes, always so tired. "We will be landing soon. You feeling okay?" I smile at him, "Yeah, I'm excited to be back. I've missed the sun." He strokes my cheek and I place my hand over his. I still seem to be tired and my head hurts most of the time.
When we land I stand up and I end up falling again. Damn it, why? I push myself up and I get Hero off the plane so he can do his business. I sink to the concrete and I soak in the hot sun. I've missed this. I watch Hero in the distance sniffing the ground.
"Emmie, let's go." Sully pulls me to my feet and I frown. I like the sun on my face, I've missed this.
"I'm never leaving Spain ever again unless it's somewhere hot," he chuckles and I walk towards the car. I slide in and call Hero into the car. I shut the door and I look into the rearview mirror and see Blake and Tommy in the car.
I look at Sully and I smile. I'm so lucky to have all these people in my life. Sully drives away from the airport and I grab his hand. He glances at me and he smiles. I shut my eyes, I sleep way too much these days but all this travelling has exhausted me.
Sully wakes me when we reach the house of horrors. I get out the car and I clutch his hand for support. Although I feel loads better this house is always going to be a dark part of my memories. Sully leans over to me and kisses my head and he leads me into the house. We are all gathered in the living room.
"Right guys, we aren't staying long. Grab your bits and we are moving house." Damon says and I hear some gasps. I wish I wasn't the one making them move out of their childhood house. I mean I never stayed in one place too long but for my kids, this is their home.
"We are moving? Why?" Lilly says startled. Damon puts his hand on her head to comfort her. I wish I wasn't uprooting them but I just can't bear it here.
"There are too many bad memories for Mom here. We need to do this for her and with Hailey here there's not enough room." What a big family we have.
"You could just get uncle Sully to move out." I hug Sully around his waist in a panic to Tommy's suggestion.
"Calm down, Emmie," Sully whispers in my ear. He hugs me to comfort me, I'm not ready. It was only ever supposed to be temporary but I couldn't imagine Sully moving out, not yet at least. I always look forward to seeing him around my house. It brings me comfort.
"If Mom needs this then we will support her," Caleb says and elbows Tommy. He's such a good boy, I don't know what I did to deserve such a thoughtful child.
"Sully isn't going anywhere," I say and look up at him and he lifts one side of his mouth. Sully's like me in that way, he doesn't want to be a burden. If he told me he wanted to move out then I would support his decision.
"Why does Sully live here?" Hailey asks. Umm, because I'm fucked up. I continue to hug Sully and besides he's keeping me upright.
"I'm sure Lilly will fill you in Hailey and you've seen some of it. I need him around, he makes me feel safer. As much I love Damon and he makes me feel safe it makes me feel better when Sully is around."
"Don't worry Mom. We will all protect each other," Caleb says. I smile at him, I still don't like them involved with the gang.
"Even me?" Hailey grins at Caleb and he grins too. Umm, what is that?
"Especially you." Caleb winks at Hailey and she gushes. Okay, they are definitely flirting, they aren't related but the intention is clear they are to be brother and sister.
"Okay, off you go. Grab a box, take everything you want to bring to the new house." I take a box from the pile. There isn't much I want to keep but I head upstairs and I want to make a start so I can get out of here as soon as I can. I take a deep breath before I enter the room. I walk in and I grab Hero's file and pop it in the box. I take my photos off the bedside cabinet, I look at them and hug the photo of me and my Daddy. I still miss him with each passing day.
I place them in the box and find my photo album that Danny got us. I start flicking through the photos before I place it in the box. I grab my make up bag and a few clothes that I'd like to keep. I put everything else I can think of that I'd need in the box and I take one last look before I pick up the box to leave the room.
I leave the room and I trip and fall headfirst into the wall. I fall back and land on my ass. "Ow," I groan. I rest the box on my lap and I rub my head. Sully walks out of his room and looks at me on the floor.
"Why do you keep falling over?" I shrug. Who knows? He gets me to my feet and takes the box from me. I hold onto Hero so I stay upright. I rub my head again and I make my way downstairs. Sully walks behind me, I guess so I don't fall over.
I can't breathe in here so I walk out the back door and sit on my swing. I need to make sure I have one in the new house. I love swinging on the porch and looking out on the garden. I should go see my horse really but I don't think we have time.
I tell Hero to explore again, I need to make more of an effort for my dog. Damon comes out and sits next to me. He puts his hand in mine, "Do you have everything you want, baby?"
"Yeah, I think so. I shouldn't be uprooting them, Damon. This is their childhood home," he brings my hand to his lips and I gasp at the contact.
"Baby, the kids will be happy wherever you are. Don't sweat this, let's see if they are ready?" he stands and pulls me with him. He doesn't let go of my hand and I need that walking back into this dreaded house. We walk into the living room and Lilly and Hailey are coming downstairs and I groan.
Is Lilly trying to antagonise Damon or what? They are both wearing short dresses and loads of skin is showing. Damon is going to flip out, I clutch tighter to Damon to try keep him calm. They have long knee-high boots on and they stand waiting to go. At least Lilly looks happier, Hailey is helping her come out of her shell.
Damon doesn't say anything so I look up at him and he looks pale. "Damon?" I whisper. He's staring at the girls and he collapses on the floor. Fuck, it all happened too quick for me to help him to the ground. "Sully!" I scream. "Damon, wake up." I shove his body but he doesn't come around just yet.
I hear Sully running down the stairs and he stops assessing the situation. "What happened?" I feel a tear escape my eye. He walks over to us and kneels the other side of Damon.
"I think he fainted he saw them in their dresses and I think it sent him over the edge. Is he dying?" I keep my voice down because I don't want to worry the kids. I place my hands around Damon's face and he starts blinking. Oh, thank god.
"I think he's fine Emmie, you pass out more than he does." I frown at Sully but that's normal for me. I'm still trying to improve my health.
"Mommy, is Daddy okay?" Lilly says panicked. I look at her giving her a reassuring smile. I focus my attention back on Damon.
"He's going to be fine Lilly. Damon, can you hear me? Emmie, calm down," Sully says. I'm freaking out here. The love of my life is lying on the floor passed out for some unknown reason. He's never passed out like this so what does it mean?
"Emmie, I'm fine," Damon mutters. Sully helps him sit up but I keep my hands on Damon's face. "Emmie." Damon looks at me and grabs my hands. "I'm fine." I hug him and he returns the hug with one arm. He seems a bit disorientated.
"Maybe we should get you checked out bro." I don't release Damon. I could have lost him, Damon shifts me on his lap and then stands up.
"I'm fine, just drop it okay?" he's angry now. Oh man, I hug his neck.
"Wow, Hailey, you look amazing," Caleb says. I glance at CJ and he's gawking at Hailey and she's gushing again! Oh dear, I'm going to need to speak to them about this.
"You two, get changed now!" I flinch at his outburst. Double crap, he's really angry.
"Why? It's hot." Hailey says in protest. Damn, she will learn not to argue with Damon.
"I'm fucking serious Hailey. We aren't leaving until you both get changed." I place soft kisses on Damon's neck to try calm him down.
"Damon, language." I'm lucky my kids don't swear as much as Damon but I know Caleb does have a habit of swearing when he's emotional. Does he do it when I'm not around?
"Well, what are you waiting for?" I gently bite Damon's neck and groan escapes his throat. He looks down at me and raises his eyebrows and I smile sweetly.
"Please, let us wear it. Mom gets to wear them." I gasp at her calling me Mom. I mean, she's a part of this family now but it takes a lot to want to call someone Mom. I look at her and I smile.
"No, absolutely not. Mom is allowed because she's older than you. Go, don't make me tell you again." I don't even care what I wear. I'd wear a bin bag for all I care. I don't like wearing short dresses because it exposes too much of my body but Damon has given me the confidence to wear them. I like to wear them to seduce him, works every time. I giggle to myself and Damon looks down at me. "Something funny, Mrs Rider?" I smile sweetly at him again.
"Damon, please. Can we just go? I don't like being here." I pucker my lips encouraging him to kiss me and he does without hesitation.
"Fine. But I won't be allowing it again," he snaps at them. He can be so hard on my kids sometimes and so easy going in others. The whole clothes situation is over the top but I know where it stems from. I remember on vacation he made Lilly where a tankini to cover her body. I guess I was kind of glad with this Joey seducing my daughter. At the same time, I was glad she had her first kiss and it was normal.
"I'm sorry Daddy. Are you okay?" Damon sighs. He knows Lilly loves him unconditionally so for him to faint must have worried her. He's her constant, the last thing she needs is him being poorly too.
"Yes, princess. Let's go," I reach up and kiss Damon's cheek. Damon sets me on my feet. I quickly gather all of Hero's bits and place them in my box. I grab my box and I grab my car keys. No one said about me driving but how else am I supposed to get my car there? I open the boot of my car and place my box in. CJ comes up behind me and places his box next to mine. I guess he's decided to ride with me. Where did Blake go anyway?
I put Hero on the back seat, I don't think Hero would cope with CJ being that close. I get in my car and put my seatbelt on. Don't want to stress Damon out anymore. Caleb slides in next to me and I watch everyone pile in their cars. Seems Sully is driving all the boxes rather than passengers.
I put my head in my hands. Man, I'm exhausted. Maybe I should have insisted CJ rode with someone else. I love driving but these days I feel too tired. I take a deep breath and start the car. I follow Damon and Sully ahead of me. Although I've been to the house I can't remember how to get there. I wasn't paying attention, I didn't even understand what we were doing.
Caleb and I chat on the way there which helps me stay awake. It's so nice to just have a conversation with my kids. I don't get to talk to them enough. When we pull up I quickly park the car and cut the engine. I sigh with relief that we made it. Caleb gets out the car and I shut my eyes. That was exhausting, I end up drifting to sleep.
"Baby?" Damon's low voice whispers in my ear. I groan in response, "If you were that tired I would have got Dyno to bring your car over." I hear him unclip my seat belt and he lifts me out the car. He walks with me in his arms and I hear lots of excited voices when we reach the house.
I will myself to wake up, all this travelling is too much for me. "Okay, come on. I'll show you your rooms." Damon says. I try to open my eyes but I'm so tired. I feel Damon carrying me up the spiral stairs. "Lilly, this is your room." We never really discussed who would have what room. I open my heavy eyes and see lilac. I shut them and remember what room it is in my head. Yes, this is the room I pictured for Lilly.
"This is amazing, thank you." Lilly hugs us both and I put my hand on her head.
"Will I be sharing with Lilly?"
"No Hailey, you'll have your own room," Damon says.
"Cool."
"Okay next room." Damon starts to move again and heads into another room. I glance at it again and see blue. "Caleb, this is your room." Hmm, can he see what I can? Can he see each of my kids in each room?
"Cool, thanks." I look at Damon to put me down and he does. I need to lie down, I look around the room and it's just Tommy and Hailey waiting to see their rooms. I walk out of the room and I head for the stairs. I stand at the top and look down to see if I can see Sully.
"Sully?" I call when I can't see him. Moments later he comes into view and he takes the stairs two by two.
"Tired?" I nod and he picks me up. "Where's my room then?" he says playfully. I point down the hall and he walks in the direction on his room. When we reach the end of the hallway Sully opens his bedroom door. He walks in and I glance at the room to check it is the right one.
"Is this okay?"
"Emmie, it's lovely. You know it's getting crowded here." I clutch tighter to his neck, why would he say this. "So if you need me to..."
A tear falls from my face, "No. Please, I know I'm a bad person wanting you here. But you are my family. Please don't leave me. Unless you want to go. I have no right to ask you to stay." I open my eyes and he's looking down at me. He places me on the bed and he lays down with me. I curl up onto his chest. He wipes my tears away.
"Emmie, relax, I'll be here as long as you want me here. I was just checking." I look into his eyes not believing him, "Honestly I would live in a cave for you. Don't sweat this Emmie." I would do the same for him too. I don't need fancy things, a cave probably would be better suited for me.
"Do you think Damon is really okay?" I close my heavy eyes and listen to his heartbeat.
"He's bulletproof. He's fine," I cringe.
"I wouldn't want to test that theory." Sully chuckles and my head bounces up and down.
"It's just a saying Emmie. Healthy as a horse. Is that better?" I laugh too.
"Sure," I smile.
"I should have known," Damon says disappointedly. I glance and him before I shut my eyes again. "Whenever I can't find my wife, she's with Sully."
"Funny." I groan but I guess it is true. I needed to lie down so I did achieve that.
"Are you still stressing about earlier?" I don't respond. Of course, I am, the love of my life just passed out for no real reason.
"Bro, give her peace of mind and go see the Doc?"
"Will it make you relax?" The bed dips behind me and his arm lowers onto my body and his hand strokes my hair. I nod, of course, it will. "Okay, we will go tomorrow. Okay? You're shattered."
"Sully, can you feed Hero...please. I just need to sleep." I hear him say sure before I pass out with exhaustion. I dream I'm in Damon's office he's sitting in his chair at his desk looking hot. He looks up at me and winks. I melt inside as his eyes penetrate me. I feel like a coldness has walked through me and I see Alex. She walks straight over to Damon and he keeps his eyes on her. Was he looking at her all along?
When she reaches him she sits astride of him. She holds his head and kisses him and they act as if I'm not here. What is going on? Damon wouldn't go back to Alex. "Damon?" I say but none of them break their passionate embrace.
I sit bolt upright in bed and my heartbeat is rapid. I feel disorientated and I remember about the new house. I'm in my bedroom with Hero, Damon must have left for work already. I miss him already and we haven't been apart long. The dream still lingers in my head. I vow to myself that I need to take care of my family from this day forward.
I get up and have a shower and brush my teeth. When I'm done I go to my closet to find some clothes to wear. I look at my leather jacket from the gang. Damon said he liked Psycho and that gives me an idea. I take my long coat and I place it around me and I do up the belt. I slide on some knee-high boots. That's all I'm wearing the coat and the boots.
I go downstairs with Hero holding on to him whilst I head downstairs. I grab a shake from the fridge and down it. I grab a banana to go. There's a note on the side from Sully saying he gave Hero breakfast. I look down at Hero and frown. I'm sorry boy, I was exhausted. I look at my phone and it's 10 am. Damn nearly half the day already. My phone starts vibrating, "Hey," I say genuinely happy to hear from her.
"Hey, Emmie. I don't want to hear excuses from you. All I want to hear is yes." I laugh at her typical Lexi, "It's girls night tonight. Invite all your girlfriends. I've already invited Jessie, 7 pm down at Valentina's bar. No guys."
"Fine, I'll see you there." She screams in excitement and hangs up. Maybe I do need a girls night. It's been a long time until we did this. I text Mom and Sarah, I don't have many girlfriends. I have a lot more guy friends.
I put my phone in my coat pocket and grab my keys. I head out the door to my car, I open my door and Hero jumps over to the other side. I slide in and start the engine, I turn up the music and I drive away. I head for Damon's safe house. The sun is beaming on my skin and I smile. The sun just puts me in a better mood. I'm glad I can accept sound and brightness without pain now. Music helps me and I sing softly until we are at the safe house.
I pull up in the car park and I get out of the car. Hero jumps over and out of my side. I shut the door and walk to the door and type in the code. It pings open and Dyno stands in the doorway and I stop not expecting him to be there. "Hey, Dinosaur."
"You're happy today. What are you doing here?"
"I'm here to see my husband. Do me a favour and don't let anyone disturb us." I wink at him and he goes red and starts coughing.
"Boss doesn't want to be disturbed. He's got an important call." I shrug and walk past him. I walk straight into Damon office and he's on the phone just as Dyno said. Damon looks pissed that he's been interrupted. His eyes soften when he sees that it's me. I walk over and stand in front of his desk and he frowns at me.
He holds the end of the phone, "Emmie, you okay? This call is important." I raise my eyebrow as if to accept a challenge.
"More important than me?" I slowly undo my belt and I let the coat fall open. His mouth drops open and I smile. He keeps his eyes on me and I push the coat off my shoulders and it ricochets on the floor.
"Fuck..." he coughs. "Wren, I need to call you back." I lean forward so my hands are placed on the desk looking at him. "I know it's important, something requires my undivided attention." I'm so glad his laptop isn't on the desk. I use my arm to swipe the desk clear and things crash and bang on the floor. Damon swallows, "Nothing, I'll call you back." Damon hangs up and I crawl onto the desk and I stop when I'm nose to nose with Damon. "I think it's my lucky day."
I place my finger on his lip. I move so that I'm sat on his desk with my legs open either side of him. He undoes his belt and jeans and he stands up and climbs on top of me. I pull him closer to me and we get lost in our own little bubble. I would never have even dreamed of coming here demanding sex like this.
Well, I didn't exactly demand I just made it hard for Damon to say no. Damon brought me out of my shell. I like this new me, I like that I'm confident enough to do this. I lay on Damon's naked chest and I stroke his abs. "What was that baby?"
"Hmm, I missed you." I don't want to tell him about my dream. It seems silly now.
He strokes my back and I still feel the static between us. "I think I should hold you, hostage, again and keep you as my personal model. You looked stunning standing there, you do know how to take me by surprise."
"I'd better go. I've got things to do." Damon laughs.
"You disturb my very important phone call and I'm keeping you?" I giggle but get up and put my coat back on. Damon pulls on his jeans and sits down at his desk. I kiss him on the lips, "I've booked an appointment with Lucas tomorrow."
"You said today." I sit in front of him and he traces the inside of my thighs with his fingers.
"He didn't have any room today and I thought you'd only want Lucas." I guess that will have to do.
"Are you feeling okay though?"
"I'm fine baby, I promise." I nod and kiss him again before I get off the desk. I do up the belt of the coat and I walk to the door and I look at him before I leave and he's still watching me. I smile before I close the door behind me. I head outside and Dyno is in the same place, "Bye Dinosaur."
He looks at me speechless whilst I exit the building. Hero jumps in when I open the car. I slide in after him and I head home. I eat the banana I took with me, I guess this wasn't really sufficient enough. When I get home I head up the stairs to put on some clothes.
Once I'm dress I head downstairs, I look at the time and it's 12.30 pm. I head out the door and I get in the car again. I head to my brother's house, well my house really. He moved back into the house Daddy left for me. I wasn't there long but it still leaves bad memories. I text Danny to come outside, I know it's his day off.
The front door opens a few minutes later and he frowns. I move Hero into the back of the car so Danny can get in the front. "Sis? What are you doing?"
"Want to go for a walk with me?"
"Sure," I drive away towards a foresty area I saw on the way here. I pull up in the car park and I get out, I grab some poo bags from the car. I tell Hero to explore and we start walking on the trail.
"I wanted to see you. I need to be there for my family. I've been selfish for years. But it's my turn to look after everyone." Danny scoffs.
"Emmie, you are anything but selfish. It's not your fault you kept getting shit luck. It's not your job to look after me." I can tell something is eating at him.
"What's up, bro? You seem...elsewhere." he looks down at me.
"Lexi and I are going through a rough patch." Does that explain the girls night? I thought they were solid. I thought it was a bit odd at the start but they seemed happy. Then again, I haven't really spent time with them for many months. "I know that when I got with her she was gay. But I thought we were strong enough to look past that."
"So what are you saying? She is cheating? Or she misses girls?" Deep down I know the issue but I don't want to say it.
"No, I don't think she's cheating. I just don't think she's happy with me. I feel like she is missing something in her life. She told me at the beginning that she loved you. I think that is still present tense." There it is. I seem to ruin peoples lives without knowing it or meaning to.
"Have you spoken to her about this?"
"I've tried but she always says that she is happy." Well, I doubt Lexi would lie.
"Shall I talk to her for you?" Maybe I can help in some way.
"You aren't gay are you?" he says awkwardly and I laugh.
"Really Bro? Even if I was I wouldn't do that to you. I wouldn't do that to Damon. Honestly, you have nothing to worry about." Not on my end anyway. We walk for a while and I grow tired. I'm thankful when I realise we've done a circle so we are back at the car. Danny walks to his side, "Bro, do you think you could drive? I'm so tired already, I don't think I've recovered from the kidnap yet." All the travelling didn't help either. He frowns at me but gets in the driver's side.
I pass him the keys when we are in the car, "I won't say no to driving this bad boy." he grins and starts the engine. I curl up on the seat and I shut my eyes. When I wake I'm on the sofa in Danny's house. I sit up quickly not wanting to be in this house. "Hey, sleepyhead. I've made you a toastie, cheese and bean." I smile at him and move my body so I'm sat against the back of the sofa I take the plate from Danny. "You've been sleeping a lot huh? Every time I rang Damon for an update he said you were asleep."
"I wasn't well in Canada bro, like worse than ever. I did something...well I wasn't myself."
"What do you mean you did something?" Damn, I shouldn't have opened my mouth. "Emmie, what did you do?"
"Look, I was ill. I couldn't eat and when I did I made myself sick. I got it into my head that Damon's security guard Ellie was trying to steal my husband. Damon tried to tell me I was seeing things. My PTSD was through the roof. I couldn't sleep, I was a mess. Stefan and Lucas came to help me. Lucas had to sedate me, I slept for days. I was so much better when I woke, everything was clear.
"I overheard Damon and Sully talking about Ellie and how she kissed Damon whilst he was drunk. Luckily Sully stopped Ellie, I confronted her. I didn't want to hurt her, I really didn't. She told me the truth that she wanted Damon. She believed Damon wanted her. She attacked me and it caused an episode. When I woke..." a tear escapes my eye and I close my eyes.
"When you woke what, sis?"
"When I woke she was dead. She hit her head on a tree."
"You killed her?" he says shocked.
"It was an accident when she attacked me it brought on an episode when fake Blake hit me. I was in the house of horrors. I told her I wouldn't fight back..." I lift my arm to look at the bite wound that has now healed.
"Sounds like you were protecting yourself. It's not your fault."
"It doesn't matter, I still took another life."
"Eat Emmie. You don't eat enough." I take a bite of the toastie and I mutter my appreciation.
"Umm, that was easy."
"Stefan made me see Danny. He made me see how skinny I actually am. He's given me a food plan. I have to eat balanced meals, I haven't done well today but at least I've eaten." I shrug and continue eating.
"How did he do that? We've tried for years."
"He tricked me. He showed me pictures of women all severely underweight. He made me order them in size order. They were horrific and then he told me they were pictures of me at different stages of my life. The most horrific one was how I am now. How could I not see?"
"Someone should give that man an award." I finish my toastie and I put the plate on the table. I pull my phone out and it's 3.05 pm. Man, I keep missing time.
"I'd better go, Bro. Good luck with Lexi."
"Should you be driving?"
"Bro, I'm fine. I've slept, I'll have a little while before I need another nap." I stand up and my legs give way.
"Emmie!" Danny rushes to my side and helps me to my feet.
"I do that a lot too." I brush myself off and I grab hold of Hero's harness.
"Let me drive you." I shake my head and make my way to the door.
"No need bro. Bye," I say whilst I open the door. He passes me my keys and I let Hero lead me to the car and I open the door. Hero jumps in and I follow. He's such a good dog. I start the car and turn up the music again.
I drive to the mall where Lexi is at work. I need to speak to her, I need to fix this as I feel like it's my fault. I pull up in the car park and I make my way to the store Lexi works at. I get some dodgy looks probably because of my dog but I ignore them. I reach the store and I walk in. I spot Lexi instantly talking to a male colleague.
He catches sight of me and his mouth drops open. Lexi turns around and looks at what he's looking at. Yes, whatever, it's just my face. "Emmie!" Lexi screams and runs into me to hug me. I return the hug awkwardly. Lexi looks awful in these work clothes. They do not do her justice.
"Lexi, who's your gorgeous friend?" Lexi releases me and I roll my eyes.
"This is Emmie, my sister in law. What are you doing here?"
"I need to talk to you."
"I'm working Emmie, if I get caught talking to you for too long I'll get in trouble."
"Well, I require a dress then. You can help me with that right?" She squeals and she pulls me towards the dresses.
She holds up a couple of dresses to my body. "Do I get full rein on this?" I shrug. I don't even need a dress but hey ho.
"Sure, Is everything okay? I know I have neglected my family but no more. I'm here for you." she frowns but continues to search for a dress.
"But you aren't though, are you?" She mutters to herself.
"What Danny said was true. You do still love me." I look at her face for some sort of indication.
"Of course, I do Emmie. You are hard to forget." I don't know why people keep telling me this. I'm nothing special. As far as I know, I didn't give her any hope.
"I love you Lexi but as a sister." What other way can I tell her without completely shattering her?
"I know, don't get me wrong. I love Danny but sometimes I think I'm only with him because he reminds me of you." I don't like the way she is talking about my brother but I do see where she's coming from.
"Lexi, you can't base a relationship like that. You have to be all in or it will hurt both of you." She could hurt my big brother and that worries me. "Danny says it's like you are missing something. Do you miss being with girls?"
"Sometimes, but that's not what I'm missing." Okay? "All my friends are having babies. I feel like I am ready to have my own." I'm surprised they haven't already. Lexi's been an amazing auntie.
"To be honest I'm surprised you haven't had one sooner but a baby won't solve your problems. You need to decide what you want but I want to make it clear that there will never be an us. I love Damon. I can only handle Damon touching me."
"I know Emmie. I love your Brother. I want a life with him." I smile, that makes me feel better.
"So go tell him."
"He isn't exactly keen on the baby idea." That seems odd.
"You didn't see how upset he was earlier. He thinks you don't want him anymore. I'm sure he will come around to the idea. My brother loves you." There must be more to this.
"But we can't afford a baby right now." Can't afford it?
"Of course you can."
"Do you think I like working? We can't." Why didn't they tell me they were struggling or even Damon? We would be only too willing to help.
"Lexi, I'm rich. If my family needs money. Then I will provide."
"I can't let you do that."
"Doesn't matter if you let me. I'll do it anyway." Money means nothing to me but a lot to others.
"Emmie, I don't know what to say." She doesn't have to say anything.
"Just be happy. That's all I ask. Anyway, I'd better go."
"Nope, not before you buy this dress. This is the one." I smile and grab the dress. I head to the counter and pay the dress. I wave at Lexi and I leave the store. When I reach my car I call Dyno, "Em?"
"I need a favour Dinosaur."
"Sure, what do you need?"
"I need you to transfer 500,000 euros each to Lexi and Danny's bank account using my personal account."
"Umm, okay. I can do that."
"Thanks, Dinosaur." I hang up and start driving home. I am shattered. I need to sleep before tonight. I get halfway home before my eyes start to get really heavy. I pull up on the side of the road. I should ban myself from driving.
I press the call button on my last called list. "Em?"
"Dinosaur. I'm so tired. Can you come get me?" I shut my eyes.
"Where are you?"
"Dunno, I was on my way home from the mall." I hang up the phone and I cut the engine. I pass out with exhaustion. When I wake Dyno has picked me up and he moves me to the passenger seat.
I drift back to sleep in seconds. I wake again in bed and I glance at my phone, It's 5.30 pm. I shower, put makeup on and style my hair. I've put on the short blue dress that Lexi bought me that Damon hates me wearing. I call Damon and he answers on the first ring. "Hey, baby. You okay?"
"It's girls night. Can you give me a lift or shall I call Sully or even Dyno?" There's a long pause before he answers me.
"Umm, I'll pick you up. I'll need to escort you, you know. Mark my territory." I laugh but Damon sounds serious.
"Well, you can deal with Lexi then. She said no guys allowed. What do you think would happen? I need to be there at 7 pm."
"I can handle my sister. She's not as hard to handle as you. I'll see you soon baby." I go to my closet and dig through it to find a small shoulder bag. I place my phone into the bag and head downstairs. I feed Hero whilst I remember.
I sit on the sofa and clock watch until Damon walks through the door along with Sully. I stand and they both gawk at me. "Could you not have picked something else, Emmie? I remember having this discussion last time."

"Umm if I remember rightly it was more of a one-sided argument when you couldn't stand the sight of me." Sully prizes his eyes away from me and makes his way upstairs. Damon comes closer to me.
"And if I also remember correctly the dress isn't far from here." he places his hand at the bottom of the dress and slides his hand to my panties and I gasp. "To here," he whispers in my ear. "You look stunning baby. I guess I was jealous last time and you were taunting me."
"Maybe, I just wanted to catch your attention but then you walked out on me," I say breathlessly.
"Hmm, I walked out before I couldn't stop myself and fucked you," he slides his fingers under my panties and then inside me and I gasp holding on to him.
"Is that what it was? I couldn't tell."
"And then you went to drive off without your seatbelt. You make me furious," he removes his fingers and slaps my ass. "I'll look forward to peeling this off you later." I bite my lip and he uses his thumb to release my lip before he kisses me. "Let's go before I keep you here." He takes my hand and leads me out the front door.