Desire | jjk. *ON HOLD*

33

I've never felt so bad my entire life. I felt like my whole world had been turned upside down, and it really hurt. The hundreds of calls that Taehyung rejected, also hurt. However, he was right; he was mad at me and I suppose that it's going to be like that for a long time.

Hyerin didn't stop apologizing since Monday, and I kept telling her over and over that it wasn't her fault. And it was true, she wasn't the one who was with another guy while she was already dating someone. I had looked for this problem myself, without anyone's help.

It's been three days, but I've rejected all of Jungkook's calls. I felt too miserable to talk to him, and I wasn't in the mood either. Deep inside, I knew that we were now free to be with each other, but I felt so bad because of how much I hurt Taehyung, and that I didn't deserve to be happy.

Math class wasn't helping either. My head hurt and even though I didn't have breakfast, I wasn't hungry. When the bell rang, I stood up from my seat as fast as possible and I left the classroom. Hyerin is next to me, but she doesn't say anything. She's been trying to lift my mood since the morning, but my answers are always the same, vague and monosyllables.

We walk out of the school quickly; however, when I place my foot outside of the school, my heart falls to my feet.

Jungkook was there, standing next to his motorcycle. It's been three days since our fight; three days since I don't know anything about Taehyung, or him. I haven't responded his calls, and I thought that would give him a clear message of "I want to be alone, please don't call me".

Why did he just appear out of nowhere?

"Did you know about this?" I ask Hyerin, who is just as surprised as I am.

"Of course not..." She shakes her head. "What is Yoongi doing here?"

I turn towards Jungkook and notice that there's someone standing next to him, it's Yoongi. He's looking in our direction, and his jaw is tense. Then, Jungkook notices my stare and our eyes lock. He looks a bit nervous, something that isn't peculiar with him, but that seems to evaporate when he walks towards us and stops right in front of me; a few steps below the stairs of the school. He's so tall that we end up being the same height.

"Why are you here?" I say with clear anger, and Hyerin tenses next to me.

"Can we talk?" He asks, ignoring my bad mood.

"Um... I have to go." Hyerin says going down the stairs before smiling at me with innocence.

I watch her leave and how she walks towards Yoongi, to then disappear with him down the sidewalk. When I turn to look at Jungkook again, his eyes are still on mine.

"What do you want to talk about?"

"Areum." My name coming out of his mouth sounds incredibly good for an instant. "You know that I came for us."

"There is no us." I answer, ignoring the fact that he walked up a step, getting closer to me. "Why don't you forget about it and go sleep with someone else who isn't a child."

I walk down the stairs and walk past him, walking in the direction of my house. I didn't have to listen to what he had to say. Because even though he apologized, I was still mad because of the other day.

"You're never going to let go of the child thing, right?" I hear behind me.

I abruptly turn around.

"I can't. Should I apologize?"

"Please, Areum, I want to fix things."

I laugh.

"You said to not look for you when Taehyung leaves me, and I'm just keeping my promise."

I turn around again and I start to walk away. My mind starts to work mechanically; it's a huge mess when it decides in between what it wants and what it needs. Seeing Jungkook made me realize how much I missed him, and a nostalgic feeling invades my mind. I feel a big oppression in my chest, and I don't know if it's because of the sadness or because of the uncontrollable urge I have to turn around and run to his arms.

"I told you not to look for me, and you didn't." He walks next to me, following my pace. "I was the one who came to look for you, don't get confused."

"Should I thank you for that?"

"I just want you to listen to me." He says standing in front of me, his eyes making eye contact with mine again. "I need you to."

"What if I don't want to listen to you?" I scoff frustrated. "I'm tired of always doing what you want, Jungkook."

"Areum..." He gets closer to me and wraps his arms around me. "I need you."

"And I need you to not hurt me." I answer, biting my cheek so that I don't cry.

"I won't, I won't do it again." He responds, holding me tighter and I place my head on his chest.

I get closer to him. His closeness makes me feel better, and I don't feel angry any more. I don't know if this is right, but it feels right. No one can change how I feel, and I can't force myself to think that my life without Jungkook will be better, because I still don't know... and I don't want to figure it out.

Then he separates himself from me and looks at me firmly. A smile extends on his face, and I can't help but to do the same. I can't help it. Seeing him smile has become one of my favorite things.

"I have to go." He whispers as he brings his face close to mine.

He closes in the space between us with a small kiss. Its short, and our lips barely touch.

"I have to practice for the fight on Friday."

"You can't practice tomorrow?"

"Sorry, tomorrow I have a date." He shrugs his shoulders.

"A date?"

"A date with an incredibly beautiful girl." He says caressing his nose against mine.

I laugh.

"Where will we go?"

"It's a surprise."

"Come on!" I hit him playfully. "Don't you think I deserve to know?"

He kisses me again, and he steps away smiling. He walks backwards and then he turns around, directing himself to his motorcycle.

"Jungkook!"

"I'll pick you up at seven." He says getting on it.

"You won't even take me home?"

He raises an eyebrow.

"What will I get?"

I walk towards him and give him another kiss. He shakes his head and smiles.

"That's not enough." He says turning on the motor.

"Oh come on!"

"I think you'll have to take the bus." He says in a challenging tone.

I step away from him and look at him firmly.

"Will you take me or not?"

He looks at me from the corner of his eye and then he smiles. Then, he gives me the helmet and I smile victoriously. I get on the motorcycle and place my hands on his chest, bringing myself closer to him. I can't see his face but I know that he's smiling. The motorcycle takes off and I hold on to his chest with force.