Phan oneshots

Left behind

Word count: 3,985

Warnings: Major character death, bullying, self-hatred, self-harm, suicide

I'm so sorry.
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Ever since the day Dan was born, he's retained an odd ability. A superpower, children called it. A freak, kids at school sneered. A medical mystery, doctors puzzled. No matter what it was called, the effect was the same: he was avoided like the plague.

It was understandable why no one wanted to be in a ten foot radius of him. Dan Howell had mind control.

He hated that term, though. It sounded scientific and cool, totally unlike the reality of his permenant burden. There wasn't anything he wouldn't do to just be normal. Unfortunately that was the only thing he couldn't command to be done, so he'd long ago accepted the lonely reality of his life.

Everyday was a perfect replica of the day before. Nothing was different from day to day. He went to school. People whispered and pointed at him in the hall. He was forced to sit in the front row where he couldn't "mentally manipulate" anyone. Gum and glue were thrown in his hair with the intent to make him lash out, for the second he did, he would be sent to the principals office with cries of "he threatened to use his freak power on me!" At lunch he sat alone, only with the company of a sandwich. Get more gum thrown in his hair, more wary and judgemental stares, then finally he was released home, all without uttering a single word.

At home things weren't much different. His mother was terrified of him, constantly scuttling nervously around, untrusting of her own son. His dad outright ignored him, as if pretending he didn't exist would erase his freak-show son.

The fact was that his ability couldn't be used unless he had eye contact with the person he was trying to inflict it upon. No one knew this, of course. No one took time out of their precious lives to ask him. He was just slapped with a label of dangerous, and that was treated as a resolute fact of life.

This was the life of Dan Howell. It was one that he accepted long ago. It wasn't going to change, might as well get used to it. And he did.

Until one day something new happened.

A student transferred to their school. Tall, black hair, blue-eyed Phil Lester blended right into their school. No one looked twice at him. He was just another normal student.

And then he decided to talk to Dan.

A hush settled over the classroom. All eyes were fixated wide-eyed on Phil, who had just spoken to Dan. The brown haired boy was also in shock. Didn't he know who he was? Didn't he know what would happen if he associated with him?

"My names Phil," the boy said, smile wide. "Nice to meet you."

Collectively a gasp rose in the classroom. Phil Lester had extended a hand towards Dan. He was going to touch him. One girl looked like she was about to run for a teacher.

Dan glowers at the hand. The sooner this boy left him alone, the better it would be. For both of them. So it was with quick, terse movements that Dan shook Phil's hand, mumbling a quiet, "you too," in response. And that was the end of his interaction with Phil Lester.

Or that's what he would've liked to have said.

Phil continued to try and engage Dan in conversation, each time feeling like he had talked to a brick wall. He didn't give up, however, and continued to—now rather annoyingly—pester Dan until one day he took a step too far.

He sat with Dan at lunch.

Dan slammed his lunch tray down, jumping to his feet. "Stop following me around!" He yelled.