𝙈𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙆𝙞𝙩𝙨𝙪𝙣𝙚 -𝘼𝙣 𝙄𝙨𝙚𝙠𝙖𝙞 𝙁𝙖𝙣𝙛𝙞𝙘-

I Won't Abandon You, Again

Me and Hatori come to a drastic halt. I can feel my body giving away. The last of my adrenaline is dying, and there is still no sign of Koharu.

"You doing good?" Hatori asks me. 

I take a deep breath in, and then out. My face feels numb against the cool evening air. I place my hand over the trashy bandaging.

"Uh... yeah. I'm doing okay." I groan. "Let's keep going."

I begin to walk, and then trip and nearly fall over something. "What on eart...."

"Oh my gosh." Hatori whispers. A dead fox is laying on the ground, covered in blood. And it looks pretty fresh.

"I think we just found another lead to Koharu." I barely manage to say. 

"I feel sorry for the thing." Hatori sighs.

"So do I." I knew, being the fox, it would come back to cut me. I didn't know when, but I knew it would come. And it has.

We continue moving through the bramble, until I come across a clearly, where I see someone crumbled on the ground. "Koharu." I whisper.

"Remember Tanaka, if she ends up fighting you, I will get involved, and I will take you back to the main estate." Hatori reminds me as I approach the clearing.

"I know. Stay here. I want to talk to her on my own." I tell him.

"I'll be right here if you need me." I still find it so weird, that he so easily allowed me to come looking for her. It feels almost wrong. But, that's not important. Koharu is.

"Koharu?" I quietly say, approaching her.

"STAY AWAY!" She shrieks, covering her face, her hands are covered in that fox's blood, and probably some of mine.

"Koharu, I don't want to hurt you." Of course you don't, but she might, I remind myself.

"STAY AWAY TANAKA!" She shouts this time, still covering her face. 

"No. I won't. I'm done abandoning you, and leaving you. And running from you, Koharu." I crouch down right next to her, and remove her bloody hands from her face.

Memories of what Kana looked like when she went nuts after Hatori's eye was injured run through my head. And then the look in Momoji's mothers eyes come. The craziness, the insanity. All because of the curse. The Zodiac. And I, not even a member of the Zodiac, managed to turn some so kind like Koharu, it a crazy person like this. 

"This is me, Tanaka. This isn't you. This is all my fault. I know it. My father always tells me it. Yet I never listen." She's not making any sense. Her father was a very kind man, from what I remember. 

"No. No Koharu it isn't." I know I can do so little right now. But I must try. I must fight. "People always say I'm kind. And I do the right things. I always help people, even those I don't know. But I didn't help you. You were right there, in the center of everything, but I ignored you. Threw you to the side. I didn't chase after you when you insisted everything was fine. I didn't try to talk to you when you grew silent. And I'm sorry. It's my fault. It's yours! And no one, not you, not the sun, not Shigure, or Akito, or anyone could tell me differently. So I won't leave you! Not until you have been helped. Not until you receive the help you need, that I've given to so many others." I pull her into a hug. 

I've abandoned her. I've thrown her into the trash. Just because I deemed her unimportant, because she wasn't apart of the canon. But, I won't make that mistake again. 

I can feel her going limp in my arms. The fight has gone out of her. "Tana.... Tanaka." Her voice has gone soft.

"I'm here." I squeeze her tighter. Tears running down my face, as she wraps her arms around me.

                                                                        -----------------------------

"They're over hear!" I hear Hatori shout. I'm not sure what time it is. All I know is I feel so refreshed. I look down, and see that Koharu is still wrapped around me. 

"Koharu." I whisper.

"Just a bit more. Don't let go of me, please." She quietly says, sounding more like a child.

"Tanaka, oh my gosh, you're eye." Shigure says, running up to us. Keruno and Hatori are both behind him.

"It's fine. I'm fine. I promise." I wave him off. "Keruno, what are you doing here?"

"I came looking for both you and my sister, when I read what had happened." He tells me, pulling the still very much asleep Koharu off of me.

"Sister?" I quietly say.

"Yes, you didn't know that?" Keruno asks.

"No. I didn't." I say.

                                                                            ------------------------------

I'm looking at the sunrise as Hatori cleans and rebandages my wound. A new day, full of chances and decisions. "Will you be erasing Koharu's memories of the Zodiac?" I ask.

"Akito, Koharu's father, and I will actually be talking about that as soon as I'm done." He sighs.

"Please, try not to. I know I'm putting a lot of faith in her. But I think she can overcome this. Fight it." I ask. I know that with mine and Hatori's current relationship it's a lot to ask. But, maybe.

"I'll try. You know, I didn't think you were going to pull through on her like you did. I'm amazed. Really." He says, looking away from me.

"Really?"

"I mean, yes, you do a lot of good things for a lot of people. But, I don't know, I thought you were mad at Koharu or something. And that's mainly why I got to so mad at you for lying at her for so long." He admits.

"You got mad at me, because you cared about Koharu?" I ask.

"Not like that. It's just, I didn't know Akito and you had decided to not tell her. So, when I found out. And then when I overheard my father and hers talking about the fact that she was starting to have weird mental break downs and stuff, I got really, really mad. And then, I found out my Dad was going to die, and I just, exploded. And I shouldn't have exploded at you. You didn't deserve it. And that's why I let you go after her." He explains.

"I didn't know that. I thought you had known. And, I didn't realize she was struggling so much. But, I should have." It still hurts. That I let the cannon characters become so important to me, that I threw my first friend in at my school, in my lifetime or remembering, away. I won't do it again. I can't do that again.

"I think, there's a limit, of how many people you can pay attention to, and make sure you're okay, before you have to wonder if you, your self is okay." Hatori shrugs.

"Well, I should have sorted out my priorities."

"Hatori? Are you done yet? Akito and Daichi are waiting for you." Shigure asks, coming into the room.

"Yes, almost. I just have one thing left to do." Hatori says, he then turns and kiss me really quickly.

"What was that for?" I ask, startled.

"You're a great person, Tanaka. But, this is the last kiss you'll be getting from me. You're wonderful, but, I think you know it too, we're not meant to be together." He explains, before getting up and leaving both me and Shigure speechless. 

"Well, I guess that means you can date me now, huh, Tanaka?" Shigure breaks the silence.

"Don't push it." I look away, to keep from showing him that I'm blushing.

"You'll come around one day." He says, plopping down next to me on the tatami mats.

"If you insist." I smile. 

He smiles back. His eyes, his mouth, his cheeks. All of it smiles. 

I don't want to abandon him, or Koharu, or Akito, or Mayu, or Hatori, or the others who have come into my life. I want to help them, and show them the kindness so many people fail to show. I think. I won't play the role of the fox again.