more life / b.simmons (2)

43

amari opens the door the nice restaurant and checks her phone to see where nia is sitting. she arrived in new york a few hours ago and is meeting nia—since it's closer than boston—to talk about everything that's going on. and besides, amari needed to get out of philly.

she walks through the dimly lit restaurant, and she can feel the stares of other guests clinging to her. it's been awhile since she felt this—or maybe she stopped noticing it. but tonight, their stares cling to her like saran wrap—men and women. they can all tell she walks with a purpose, like she's supposed to be looked at.

nia sits on her phone at a table, and looks up when she hears the click of amaris heels. "girl, look at you!" nia exclaims, jumping up out of her chair and motioning for her friend to do a spin. amari chuckles before gracefully spinning while pulling down her white blazer dress. "cmon, legs." nia says, pulling her friend in for a hug.

they pull apart and take their seats. a glass of wine sits in front of amaris placemat and she takes a sip as nia just stares at her. it's been awhile since amari has gotten dressed up and looked genuinely happy. "what?" amari asks after taking a sip of her wine and seeing nias face.

"nothing, you just look... good," nia says. if only she knew. "but talk to me: what's up?"

"well..." amari starts, thinking of ways she can tell nia that she is officially divorced. amari never told her over the phone because it was something that needed to be said in person. she told her parents, and they had long conversations on the phone, but other than them, no one else knows. not even bens parents. "for starters, our divorce was finalized."

nias jaw drops at the information. "really?" amari only nods and smooths out the bottom of her dress. "no wonder you look the way you do!" nia says, her face a look of amusement.

"huh? what do you mean?" amari asks, her face twisted up in confusion. she looks the same, except maybe a little more glowy.

nia vaguely gestures to the woman across from her. "you got your legs out like your single—because you are. you never dress like this, girl," she comments.

"yes i do!"

nia snorts and it makes amari laugh because her friend has a point. not that amari cared about what ben had to say about how she dressed, but since being married and then becoming a mother, she dressed a lot more conservatively compared to how she did when she met ben. but shes single again—everything is off the table and she can look how she wants.

with a shrug, amari says, "it is what it is."

"when did everything get finalized?" nia asks, taking a sip of her own drink.

amari lets out a sigh—that's how life feels right now; like a long, heavy sigh, despite feeling better after being divorced. there still feels like a lingering weight, and she can't tell if it's the fact that she still loves him, or that they still have unfinished business to handle.

"a little under two weeks ago—and i waited to tell you in person," amari adds after seeing the look on nia's face.

"and what did he say?"

"he signed the papers and that was that. we haven't talked about it, and the last time we spoke was when i dropped the kids two days ago, and even then we barely talked."

nia nods thoughtfully, taking in the new information. it's been painfully awkward for ben not talking to amari, but seeing her because of the kids. she ignores him like he's not even there and leaves without a second thought or another word. it's easy for amari to give him the cold shoulder because she has mentally unattached herself from ben, despite the fact that she knows that she still loves him. ben, on the other hand, can't let go of her, even though he did all of those years ago when he cheated the first time.