After I Met You

16

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚂𝚒𝚡𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗

"SO, YOU'RE A thing now." Logan slowly nods his head as he processes the newly given information. I've been dreading this moment for almost a week, and now that it's here I feel even worse.

"Not exactly." I try to explain. "We're just... working on things I guess. Well, I'm working on myself so that we can potentially be a thing."

I continue to stare at my feet that are dipped in the water, avoiding looking at him at all cost. If I see the hurt in his eyes then I'm not going to be able to handle it. Hurting Logan is the last thing I want to do.

I peek up at him to see him staring off into the trees. He looks deep in thought for a second before he exhales a huge breath and slumps his shoulders in defeat. "Alright." He says. "Thanks for telling me."

"This doesn't mean that we're going to stop being friends. Xavier knows that you're important to me, Logan. I'm not going to stop talking to you."

"It'd be fine if you needed to." He shrugs, his tone clipped. "I'd understand."

"You'd be fine with never speaking to me again?" I ask. Now I'm finding myself becoming annoyed. I thought I meant more to him than that. He'd really be able to write me off no problem?

He doesn't say anything at first. He hasn't been his usual self today, and I assumed it's because he knew why I wanted to talk to him. I think he had a feeling that I was starting things back up again with Xavier.

"I just think that maybe it's best if we just stop being friends." He says coldly. "In the end it'll be better for both of us."

"In the end?" I repeat. "Logan, what the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm saying that it's going to be too hard for me." He looks over at me and narrows his eyes. "I can't see you with him, Elena. I don't like the fact that he treated you like complete shit and he's still the one you chose. The worst part is that even though I can treat you so much better, I know that choosing him is way better than you choosing me. That hurts like hell to say, but it's the truth."

Nothing he's saying is making sense. I'm blinking away tears to try and mask that I'm not hurt even though I'm devastated. Logan has become the one person I felt like I could lean on aside from Amelia and Xavier. I don't have many friends. I rarely open up to people. So for him to leave my life like I'm nothing hurts like hell.

"The last thing I want to do is hurt you." I bite on my lip and pull my feet back up onto the bridge to dry them off. "If that's what you need then I'm going to have to respect that."

"So can we go then?" He clears his throat to stop himself from getting emotional, clenching his jaw in anger. I've never seen him this way.

Not even knowing how to respond, all I can do is stand up onto the bridge and reach down to grab my backpack as he collects his things and starts walking back to his hummer.

The hummer I'm never going to sit in again.

"Logan, can we please just talk about this?" I ask as I buckle my seatbelt. He starts the engine and begins to drive down the road, his jaw remaining clenched. "I don't want you out of my life."

"I don't know what to tell you Elena." He laughs sarcastically, and the use of my first name sends a dagger through my heart. What happened to Garcia? "You've been playing mind games with me the moment I met you. You kiss me and then tell me you didn't mean it, you call me to come fix your problems and then end up wanting him instead, I fight for you and stick up for you and I'm the one getting kicked out of your room at night rather than him. What the hell do you want from me?"