37. Jimin: Can You Keep A Secret?

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Yoongi's POV

Something is bothering him, we can all see it and it's not the first time. He's making himself sick because of it, but he won't tell anyone. When we ask he says he can't say and then locks himself in his room and it's hard to watch. What secret could possibly be so bad that he can't tell us? Especially since he is getting sick because of the stress of it, and like I said not the first time, so how long has he been keeping it from us? I worry, today is supposed to be special, a meet and greet that is on the anniversary of debut, but we've made it and it's supposed to be special, but I can't smile knowing that his smile and laugh isn't real. Why won't he tell us? We all see the bags under his eyes from lack of sleep, and we hear the throwing up no matter how hard he tries to hide. He barely eats, barely sleeps, but never stops working and fake or not always has a smile on his face. I am going to ask him, alone. I fear that when we try to talk about it he feels ganged up on. So I walk to his room and sit on his bed and he pulls the headphones out of his ear and I made sure to shut and lock the door.

"Whats up?" I ask and he shrugs.

"Just chilling before tonight." He says and I sigh.

"No really, I want to know what I can do, I see it, I know you're not well, how can I help?" I ask and he just shrugs again.

"I know I want to tell someone but I can't." He tells me and I give him a little smile.

"You can tell me, I want to help and I promise to keep it to myself." I say and he shakes his head.

"No I can't, because if I do others get involved and it's not worth it." He explains and I frown. I get up after he puts his headphones back in his ears and I leave to get ready. We are performing tonight for the fans and I am really excited, but I am still really worried about him. We get in the car to leave and it appears again the fake smile and then he shuts out, listening to music. I sigh getting lost in thought about how it has come to this, how did it spin so far. I am pulled from my thoughts by Jungkook shaking me.

"Hyung we are here, I have been trying to get your attention for five minutes now." Jungkook tells me and I sigh.

"Sorry Kookie was lost in thought." I explain and he nods, knowing exactly what I was thinking about.

"I know hyung, we are all worried about him, but he would tell us if he couldn't handle it right?" He asks and I shrug.

"I don't know Kookie, he seems to be killing himself over this secret and he told me last night that he wants to tell us but he can't." I explain and Jungkook nods then sighs.

"Well hyung, we should probably get in there before Namjoon hyung comes looking for us and we get in trouble, but we will talk to him about it and if we can't get him to tell us, we will have to talk to our manager, because his health is suffering." Jungkook tells me and I get out of the car and nod as we walk into the building.

Jimin's POV

I am in the backstage area getting ready and I can't help but feel tired all of a sudden. I want to tell them I really do but I just can't. I get myself ready and I see Jungkook and Yoongi walk in and Yoongi gives me a small smile. I return a fake small smile back, so I don't worry him, almost saying I am okay. They know, I know that and I knew I couldn't hide it forever but I can't tell them. We go up on the little stage and sit in our seats to meet the fan and sign albums. We are doing a little performance afterwards and I am really excited, because I have been working so hard. It's a distraction and it is the best way to handle the stress of the secret, by stressing about something else. One by one fans come and I give them fake smiles and fake laughs and it's to the point that I fake so much now that I don't feel real at all. I see the boys looking at me. They are worried I know they are, but I can't. I know I look sick and I know that I am getting thin, but I can't help it.

"Jiminie are you alright?" Taehyung asks me, as I put my head on the table feeling a headache starting to occur.

"Yeah Tae, just a little headache I will be okay." I tell him and he looks like he doesn't believe but nods. I know he didn't believe me because as soon as he turns from me he turns to Namjoon and starts talking to him and Namjoon is just nodding. I see them each one by one talking to each other and I know it's about me. We get done with the fan sign part and are now moving onto the performance part and we are performing three songs. We get set up for Airplane Part 2 and we are doing well but I notice my headache getting worse. Next is Anpanman and I do my fake smile but I am starting to feel lightheaded. I try to make my way to Yoongi, and just as I reach him I feel my legs give away and I fall to the floor.

"JIMIN!" Was the last thing I heard before everything went black.

Namjoon's POV

I was afraid this was going to happen, he got too sick. We are at the hospital waiting for Jimin to wake up because he is going to tell us what is going on. I can't handle the fact that the doctors told us we could have lost him, he is weak from not eating and not sleeping and he is thin. Him collapsing was inevitable, with the path he was on. I am pulled from my thoughts when I feel Jimin start to stir under my hand that was resting on his arm.

"Jimin, how are you feeling?" I ask and he shakes his head.

"Horrible." He tells me, and I nod.

"You scared us hyung." Jungkook says and Jimin looks at him and smiles, his real smile for the first time in months.

"I am sorry guys, I don't know where it all went wrong, I should have told you from the beginning." He tells us and we all knew there was a secret but we are still confused.

"Tell us what Jiminie?" Hoseok asks and Jimin sighs.

"It's a distant relative I have met once, he is jealous or something of my career and he told me that he was going to hurt one of you or all of us and when I told the company the told me to keep it to myself and they will keep us safe, but not to add extra unneeded stress to you guys." He tells us and we all look at him like he will break.

"Jiminie you could have told us, no matter what the company said." Yoongi says and Jimin starts crying.

"It wouldn't have been too hard to keep it to myself, but this person was at our events, I would see them randomly and before I could say anything to security they were gone." he tells us and I sigh.

"I am so sorry you had to go through this Jiminie but we are here and now one is going to hurt us I promise." I tell him and we all group hug.

"Thanks guys, I am glad to have you as my family." Jimin tells us and we all smile, knowing we always have each other. 

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