The Journey

You F*cked Up

Last Tour Date

Things with Leigh and I have been magical. We are always cuddling and sneaking kisses. We still haven't put a label on anything though. 

I walking with Jade and Leigh right now heading to our dressing room when someone yelled out at Leigh. 

We turned around to see Jordan at the end of the hall and he comes jogging over to us and grabs Leigh-anne by her waist pulling her into a kiss. 

I was frozen in place so Jade grabs my wrist and pulls me into the dressing room and into the bathroom locking the door. 

"What the fuck." I say putting my hands on my head with tears brimming in my eyes. 

"I don't know babe." She says and pulls me into a hug causing me to break down. 

"She lied Jade. Why did she lie?" I ask her with my voice cracking. 

She pulls away holding my face in her hands wiping my tears. 

"You are a beautiful, loving, caring person. I don't know why Leigh did that but it has nothing to do with you. It is not your fault, you did nothing wrong." She says and I sniffle nodding my head. 

She smiles at me and I give her a half smile back. 

I take a deep breath and use the sleeve of my long sleeve to wipe my eyes and nose. 

I hear heavy foot steps come into the dressing room. 

"Where is she? Where's Mikayla?" I hear Leigh ask and then groan muttering a 'fuck' then footsteps exiting the room. 

Jade opens the door holding me in her arms. 

"How about you stick with me today and the other girls?" She asks and I nod in agreement. 

"Can you tell the other girls what happened? I don't really want to talk about it. I just want to get through today and no more pity. Just smiles all day." I say trying to put on a brave face. 

Jade smiles and nods pulling out her phone while I sit at the mirror fixing my light makeup I had on. 

"The girls said they are sorry and have your back and will try and keep Leigh away and keep the smile on your face there." She says. 

I nod looking at her through the mirror and finish fixing my face. 

"Girls sound check!" We hear someone yell so I grab a water bottle and Jade grabs my hand and we head to the stage. 

We walk onto the stage and Leigh spot me and starts walking towards me but is stopped by Jesy standing in between us. 

She just shakes her head and Leigh gives me one last look before going to her spot on stage where we start at the beginning of the show. 

I could feel Leigh's eyes on me and I just keep my eyes away. 

The next song is "Nothing Feels Like You" and as I'm singing I just feeling the song and not trying to think about what the lyrics mean. 

I hear Leigh's voice come through the speakers and I just try to feel the song when suddenly I feel someone put their arm around my waist and pull me into them. I come face to face with Leigh as she is singing to me. 

"But none of them compare, Baby you're the one I'm waiting for, ooh, oh yeah" 

"Leigh no!" Jesy says as Perrie sings the next line pulling me away from Leigh-anne. 

Fuck dude the second song and tears are brimming in my eyes already. 

She really hit me in the gut with that line. Full of bullshit. 

We finished the setlist and Leigh didn't come near me again despite her efforts since one of the girls would always stop her. That didn't stop her lingering eyes throughout the soundcheck though. 

I smiled as we finished wings and I head start to catering since I always go that where I always go after soundcheck. 

I grab a plate and look at what is on the menu. It's pesto pasta and chicken!

I grab a spoonful of pasta and a piece of chicken sitting down at a table and I scroll through my phone looking for a show to watch. 

I see someone sit across from me and I look up to see Leigh sitting across from me. 

"Please let me explain." She says as her eyes well up. 

"There's nothing more to explain. You fucked up. Did you even talk to him that day?" I ask getting a bit worked up. 

"I couldn't bring myself to tell him but I also couldn't lose you. I didn't know he was going to show up." She says trying to make excuses but I don't want to hear any of it. 

"It was going to come up eventually. You really think I wouldn't have found out huh? Leigh-anne I was ready to have things between us be official. You wanted to make everyone happy but in the end I was hurt and Jordan was hurt because you weren't being faithful to him." I said causing her to look down. 

"I told Jordan things were over. We can finally be together now." She says grabbing my hand. 

"Actually no we can't." I say and pull my hand away. "I'm done with your little mind games. I'm not just something you can play with anymore. My feelings matter." 

"No please we can make it work." She says getting desperate. 

"Maybe we can but not right now." I say and look down at my plate of food. 

"I meant those lyrics ya know. No one compares you will always be the one I'm waiting for. I will wait for as long as it takes." She says and I pick up my plate of food standing up. I stand right next to where she sitting and give her a kiss on the cheek. 

"Please be true to your word this time." I say and then exit catering. 

I go into the dressing room and sit down lets out a big sigh. 

Why did you have to fuck everything up Leigh?