After War Storm

Mare

So, as promised last chapter, we have Mare's POV. It's not as long as I originally thought it was going to be but I wanted to get something up as it has been 2 weeks. The next chapter will also be Mare's POV and hopefully it will be a bit longer than this. Anyway, on with the story...

Slowly, I blinked my eyes as I focused on my surroundings.

I was lying on a bed in an unfamiliar room. Where was I? And how did I get here?

I slowly looked around and all I could think was: Ti's not here.

I clutched my chest as a terrible pain shot through me as I thought about Ti.

He was really gone.

I'd failed him as a mother. He'd needed me to protect him and I hadn't been there.

Why had I ever gone looking for those damn Newbloods?

I carefully sat up in the bed, my whole body feeling tired and achey.

I couldn't remember much of what had happened after Cal and I returned. Only Eve giving us the worst news two parents can ever here and then I wasn't sure what and happened after that.

Had I passed out? And if so, how long had I been out?

No one else was in the room with me, which kind of surprised me. Where was Cal? Was he off somewhere in the same state as me? Each thought filled with grief?

Then my eyes landed on a piece of paper on the cabinet beside the bed.

Carefully I reached out and picked it up, turning it over once I leant back against the pillows in a comfortable position. It was an envelope and the front read one word:

Mare

I cautiously opened it.

Dear Mare,
First off I would like to say how sorry I am about Ti. Words can not express how much it hurts me to see you and Cal having to face life without your son.

When Shade died, I promised myself that I would always do whatever I could to make sure another Barrow would never come to harm as long as I was around. I vowed to myself that I'd always protect those I cared about and my family. And I am so sorry that I was unable to do that.

I had to write this in a letter because I left for Montfort shortly after you returned and you weren't awake at the time for me to speak to you in person. I would much rather have done that but I couldn't afford to wait when I could be in Montfort.

Partly, I have gone to see Clara and your family. I will not tell them about Ti but if you want me to then send me a letter and I will. I know it would be extremely hard to tell your family but if it's something you would like to do in person then I will respect that and wait for you to be ready.

But Clara isn't the only reason I travelled to Montfort. I've gone to look for something. I cannot tell you what that is yet but I hope it won't take me too long to find. It is extremely important and I know everyone would be much happier if I am successful in finding what I am looking for. Sorry for being so cryptic but I can't tell you yet.

Stay strong Mare. I know you would have done anything to save Ti and are in a terrible place right now. After losing Shade, I pushed everyone away. It broke my heart but I could not afford to waste away over it. I had Clara and I needed to be there for her. Losing someone you love takes a piece of you away and it's not about working to fill that gap, or ignoring that it's there, it's about learning how to live with it. You will always feel that piece missing, but it won't always hurt so much. You'll have good days, and you'll have bad days. But Mare, don't push away those around you. Accept their help. They're grieving too and together you will pull through stronger.

Mare, you're the strongest person I've ever met and I know if anyone can get through losing a child, it's you.

Farley.

By the end of the letter, I was crying.

But Farley was right. I would never get over losing Ti, that's not something you can get over, but I would take comfort in those I have around me. I would be there for them as they are for me.

Suddenly, the door burst open and someone stormed in. "Uncle, we need a-" Cal started but froze when he saw me.

"Mare," he whispered.
"Cal," I whispered back, tears already brewing in my eyes just looking at him.

He looked so like Ti.

"Cal," I repeated, slightly louder, the tears streaming down my cheeks.

He was on the bed in a second, his arms wrapped around me. I melted into his embrace, my arms tight around him.

We were both crying into each other, letting out the emotions that only the two of us understood.

I knew the others would be very sad too but no one feels the same as the parents.

Parents.

I'm not a parent anymore.

But Ti would always by my son, no matter where he is. I would still do anything for him, I'd do anything to have him back.

It felt like we had been there for hours, not speaking, just holding each other and being the support we needed, when the door opened.

We both looked up to see Julian and Sara. "You're awake," Sara said, smiling at me. It was a sad smile, sad yet happy. Happy I was awake, sad about Ti.
"How long was I out?" I asked as I wiped my tears, Cal keeping an arm round me.
"Just over a day," Sara answered. I think that's right. Honesty I've lost track of how long it's been.

I nodded slowly.

"We need a Council Meeting," Cal said, tuning to Julian.
"Why?" He asked, just as confused as I was. Now didn't seem like the best time.

"Jake came and spoke to me," Cal started slowly "and told me that he thinks knows who killed Ti."

I gasped as soon as the words left his mouth. We knew who had done it. I could not wait to get my hands on them and show them every bit of pain they deserved to feel.

"Who?" Julian asked.
"Her names Maria," Cal told us.

"I'm going to kill that bitch," I said quietly.
"And I am going to help," Cal agreed "but we have a problem."

"What is that?" Julian asked, slightly cautious and worried now.
"She's a Merandus."

I didn't think I heard Cal correctly. I stood up, blocking out what the others were say and made my way to the door.

As soon as I was outside I punched the wall.

Ti had been killed by a Merandus. A Merandus.

How? I thought they were all dead. They would be soon.

I would find her and make sure she met the end she deserved.

Maria. I'm coming for you.