Secret Obsession (Completed) 18+

Part 1

 **Mew's POV**

It has been a few months since the last time gulf and I shot any scenes for Tharntype and its making me realize that I miss him terribly. It has been a year since I realized that I secretly love him but I know that we can never be a real couple because he only sees me as a brother. Thankfully we still have all of those fan meetings to attend. Especially since there will be one this afternoon but I still don't know what to wear. Maybe I should call gulf and see what he wants to wear since we always wear matching outfits to our events. I happily walk over to my closet thinking about what I should say to gulf when I call him but at that moment I start to hear my phone ring.

Mew: "Hello..."

Manager: "Hey Mew, I was just calling to let you know that the fan meeting this afternoon has been cancelled. Gulf is..."

Mew: "Gulf is what!? Is he okay? Did he get in an accident? Does he not want to work with me anymore? Does he..."

Manager: "Jesus Mew will you just let me finish my fucking sentence first?"

Mew: "Yea sorry my bad... Continue..."

Manager: "As I was saying, Gulf is currently sick and can't get out of bed today so we have rescheduled the fan meeting for next week to give him some time to recover. So I have a favor to ask of you if your free."

Mew: "Ahhh okay, yea I understand. Just send me the new details for the fan meeting next week. What is it that you need?"

Manager: "I need you to spend the week at Gulfs house and take care of him to help him recover quicker and more comfortably. I know it is a lot to ask of you but we need him to get better and I need someone to help me keep an eye on him. You know he is fragile more than anyone else"

Mew: "I will be there in 30 minutes, talk to you later with updates. Bye."

I hurriedly hang up on my manager and start to grin like an idiot. I get to see Gulf!!! Not only do I get to see him but I get to stay with him for a week. This must be my lucky day. I do not care that Gulf will probably never love me the same way I love him but as long as I get to see him and stay close to him, that is enough for me.

As I throw my Suitcase into my car and make my way to Gulfs house is when I start to feel really nervous. Am I going to be able to control myself around him? This makes me remember the one time during rehearsal when Gulf and I were supposed to rehearse for a kissing scene and I accidently gave him a hickey on the side of his collar bone because I got too into the moment. Thankfully I was able to just say that I was trying to get into the moment to help my acting but I was truly happy and dying on the inside asking myself what I had just done.

Shaking my head hard, I try to concentrate on the road. It's a bit rainy today so I need to watch out for the crazy drivers in this town instead of daydreaming of the past. I wonder if Gulf is sleeping right now, I hope I don't wake him up...

When I reach Gulfs house I turn off the car and just stare at the somewhat fancy house. He was never really into the big mansion thing . I actually really like his average house, it makes him seem more humble then most people. Gathering the courage to go inside I finally open the car door and step outside. Thankfully my luggage is not very heavy because I am not really sure how much strength I have right now with all my nerves going haywire.

As I ring the doorbell I clench my teeth realizing my mistake. Fuck, what if he was sleeping. I do not want to see a grumpy Gulf. He is scary when he is upset. Shit.

Gulf opens the door while looking fairly awake so I think I am safe, few that was close. I launch myself at him into a giant bear hug not caring if he gets me sick. Laughingly Gulf looks at Mew and Hugs him back. God I think my heart is going to explode every time he is in my arms. I grab Gulfs hand and half walk half drag him to his living room to explain to him my conversation with our manager this morning.

I sit down on his very comfortable and soft reclining chair waiting for him to walk close enough for me to drag him into my lap like always. At least it is one thing I can do with him without it being weird because we are awesome like that. I pull his arm and he falls into my lap with my arms wrapped around his small but muscular chest. God I love how soft he is. I rest my head on his shoulder and tell him about what went down that morning while rubbing my fingers in a circular formation against his side.

While explaining everything, I start to hear soft snoring sounds. That's when it dawns on me that Gulf has fallen asleep in my arms. Smiling to myself and wondering how there could be such a beautiful man in this world. Unlocking my arms around his sides I reach one arm under his legs and another gripping under his arms I stand up and walk him to his room.

Who knew that Gulf actually weighed more than anyone would think. Yea I playfully pick him up all the time but there is something different in carrying him bridal style. As I lay him down on his bed his shirt slowly lifts up from being stuck under his back. Shit the exposed skin of his abdomen is so fucking sexy. I lean down hesitantly and lightly brush my lips against the exposed skin of his stomach and groans softly while moving my lips in a horizontal line across his stomach lightly leaving tiny kisses before I start to pull back. I want him so badly, If only he loved me back.

As the thought of me truly wanting him to love me crosses my mind, i can feel myself starting to feel hot. Fuck why does he have to be so damn cute. I look back down at him and i reach out my hand to graze the area that i just left my kisses all over his lower stomach with my fingers. As i Slowly move my hands against his stomach up his shirt until i can feel his heart beat under my palm, I close my eyes and slow my breathing. In. Out. In. Out.

While keeping one hand on his heart, my other hand slowly shifts back down his stomach until i feel my fingers graze against the rim of his sweats. As i slowly hook my fingers under the rim of his sweats and push down a few inches, i realize what im doing and freeze.

I open my eyes and jump back in suprise as i see Gulf staring at me with wide eyes and a look of curiousity on his face. Shit. I stand up really quickly, mumble an apology and rush out the door with no explination or room for argument.

Once i get out of the room and slam the door, i whisper "Fuckk" under my breath. What did i just do. I dont know if Gulf will see me the same way now and its only the first night. I wring my hands together and quickly walk to my room, not giving myself time to calm down until im safely under the protection of my blankets in the guest room. Thats when i feel them, the tears, the god damn tears. What if i just fucked everything up. Gulf please dont hate me.