LIGHTED FEELINGS

Chapter Thirteen

THIRD PERSON P. O. V.

"It's all just seems so odd. Went from being best friends to expecting parents..." Faye trailed off starring down at her funnel cake.

"That I have a little life growing inside of me." Faye's smile became wide but then quickly disappeared.

"Oh my god, I'm so nervous. What if they hate us?"
Faye mumbles more to herself before looking up at Adam when she hears him chuckle.

"Hey our baby is not going to hate us."

"Stop laughing at me!" Faye rolls her eyes slapping Adam's shoulder.

"But seriously, are you feeling okay? You've barely eaten your food and you love chili cheese fries."
Adam furrows looking down at Faye's food.

"I'm not really that hungry anymore this is making me feel nauseous."
Faye's mumbles pushing her tray forward.

"Are you still taking your vitamins?"

"Yes, of course. Maybe you've forgotten that you call me everyday like clock work to check." Faye giggled shaking her head before taking a sip of her water.

"Okay, maybe I do that. But you really need to eat something. There isn't anything else that sounds at least a little bit appealing to you?"

"Adam stop, I am keeping up with myself. I promise, you don't need to worry."

"So have you told anyone at your job yet?" Adam asks clearing his throat.

"No, not yet. No one but my assistant. You?" Faye asks biting her lip.

For a second Adam wasn't sure about how he should answer the question. Knowing how Faye gets and all.

"Just Reggie, he was being nosy the other day and overheard me and you talking about your next OB appointment." Adam says looking to see her reaction.

"Well it is Reggie. Being nosy is his thing... but enough about that... I have a question that I've been wanting to ask you for a while now."
Faye trails off looks down at the gold a turquoise bracelet wrapped around her wrist.

Adam immediately felt a sense of dread after hearing her words. He nodded his head encouraging her to go on.

"How does co-parenting sound to you? I mean we need to start figuring out a plan now."
Faye asked it so quickly that it might've been unclear.
But Adam had heard her clear as day.

"Co-parenting?" Adam furrowed looking at Faye quizzically.

Faye suddenly found the fly away thread on her sweater far more interesting than maintaining eye contact with Adam.

"Ya know when we both-"
Faye began glancing up at Adam then back at her sweater before Adam intervened stopping Faye from finishing her sentence.

"Faye, I know what co-parenting is. I'm saying why do we need to co-parent?"
Adam furrowed sitting back in his seat folding his arms over his chest.

"Well because we're not together... that's what expecting parents do when they're not t-"

"What is this then? Faye, we literally just talked about this. I swear, it's like we take 2 steps forward just to take 4 steps back." The frustration was clearly evident on Adam's face.

So much so that Faye began to feel bad.

"Date... that's what I said this is. I asked to take you on a date and you said yes. I don't want to pressure you, believe me that's not what I am trying to do, but come on."

"Why won't you give us a chance?" Adam leaned forward reaching for Faye's hand that rested on the table and wrapping his hand with hers.

Faye rolled her eyes at how cliche this moment felt to her.
The jumping of her heart and the flutter that whirled around in the pit of her stomach.
It all seemed so Cliche.
But at the same time she loved the feeling.
The warmth of her hand being encased in his.

"Adam, I'm sorry but a relationship is just something I am not ready for... And I honestly don't know if I ever will be ready for one. It isn't right for me to lead you on. You're an amazing guy and you deserve to be with someone who is there and is ready to take that step with you. Adam I am sorry but right now I am not that someone."
Faye finished off glancing up at Adam before suddenly becoming more interested in her food.

"Okay, I understand that but I mean come on. Faye you know me, We have known each since we were kids. If you really wanted to be with me you would. Let's just be honest here, I understand what you mean when you say you aren't ready. But I also know you. You're the type of woman who will only have ten dollars on her and not much else and will see a homeless person on the street and give them five dollars even though you don't have very much yourself.
You're always looking out for everyone but you. And I'm telling you that now is the time more than ever to look out for you."

"Adam, no you're not understanding me, right now. It is selfish of me to lead you on. When so many other women would be lucky to have you. In the back of my mind yes there is a part of me that wants to give us ya know a shot. But then I think about it, and I'm only just going to end up hitting you in the end... but now we have a baby... we have a human life that we're both responsible for so that cannot happen." Faye voice had become shaky as she continued to talk her making complete and full eye contact with Adam the entire she spoke.

After her last few words things became silent between them.

"Somehow... For some unknown reason, you never took note of my feelings for you. Even when I stopped hiding them senior year and decided to make them obvious to you.... But then again, maybe you did notice. But then what? Did you just decide to ignore them... See Faye, there are so many possibilities of what can happen but you are not open to them. You're too afraid to take risks."

"Adam even if I had know, yes I wouldn't have acted on it. Doing so would've hurt a perfectly good friendship-"

"Perfectly good? Faye most of the time I was pining after you trying to make sure that you were always happy. At least that's how Amber saw it too. I don't know if you haven't noticed yet but our friendship is never going to be the same. Rather I got you pregnant or not. Either way we slept together and that alone has changed everything between us. So stop worrying about the inevitable...."