Alive//H.S

Panic Room

My phone has no signal
It's making my skin crawl
The silence is so loud
The lights spark and flicker
With monsters much bigger
Then I can control now

PLEASE GO LOOK AT THE CAST LIST THERE HAS BEEN A CHANGE 🏃‍♀️

Lila Rose

When I tell you I didn't sleep, I mean I didn't sleep.

I mean..what more could you expect for the first night before you are traveling around the world with a man that is way too attractive and way too comforting?

The night had started out fine and all, but by the time three in the morning rolled around, I was way too far deep into my own thought to even try and push off the urges that take over my mine. It felt different this time, and instead of the pounds of guilt, I felt relieved. And I felt like I had no idea what I was getting myself into the next days, and even if this was actually what I wanted. For some reason when Harry had come to Stevies I was too distracted by his beauty and gorgeous accent to even process what agreeing to this would mean.

Now, where I sit beside Harry in his car on the roaring traffic blocked interstate, I'm almost positive I have made the right decision. Harry's rings were tapping a perfect beat to the song on the radio as I pressed into my hands in anticipation.

I was horrified that something would go wrong, or I'd say something wrong. This isn't like a recording meeting like all the other days have been, this was a year. A year full of stuff I can't even imagine to think about. I feel Harry's eyes on me and I pretend to not notice it, but instead, I fold my hands in my lap, pushing some hair that had fallen out of the sides of the braids I was sporting behind my ears.

"You seem nervous," he said quietly and I feel his knuckle tap my outer knee in a comforting way before he strokes his knuckle across the side of my knee, and my spine shivers at the comforting touch. I shrug and he doesn't move his hand as we stay in silence, and I can feel the lack of sleep crashing in on me as the comforting touch of him has me smiling to myself.

I watch curiously as we arrive in this smaller parking lot, and my eyes widen at the size of the bus sat in the middle of it. My dad never took tour buses, more refusing them, and opted to drive himself so it was no hassle, especially since I was a very energetic kid and was always in need of something to do. I had expected the bus to be big, but by the size of it, I guess I was wrong. I got out of the car slowly just as Mitch's car pulled up, him getting out and sporting the Gucci tracksuit he had laid over this chest.

"Hey tulip," He smiles, kissing my cheek and I smile at him as he passed us by, walking towards the bus and up and onto it without a second thought. I grabbed my bag from Harry's car, still looking up at the bus when a man in a dark sweater and jeans exited the bus. he was very tall, his jeans hung high over his big belly and I found myself smiling at the southern appearance to him.

"Howdy, kiddo. I'm Lance. It's nice to meet you," He says and I shake his hand, introducing myself and I can feel Harry's eyes on me from where he was inside of the bus, probably already getting into an argument with Mitch. They're like means girls I swear to god. On the way here Harry had complained about how Mitch always suggested Taco Bell instead of something healthier and I hasn't heard such a weak argument in my life.

I climb into the bus after meeting Lance, and I look around. The front living room was just a couch and a love seat, pretty big actually, and across from that was a simple bar of snacks and waters and stuff. I walk past that, seeing a tiny bathroom and shower, until finally, I hear where Harry was, his eyes catching mine and I smile at the way his sunglasses were perched in his hair. A single curl fell in front of his eyes when I looked up at him, and I had to hold back from reaching out to curl it in my fingers.

"Mitch and I already kinda took a claim on the bunks we wanted, so you can choose one of those," He says guiltily and I nod at him, moving behind him and deciding on the bunk across from Mitch's, Harrys below his. I slide my bag into the bunk and I take out the pillow and blanket I had brought along with me.

"It gets so cold in here, so we usually stop somewhere and get lots of blankets," Mitch says from where he sat cross-legged in his bunk, a makeup bag next to him as he applied his mascara over his thick lashes. I nod, knowing that I would probably want to get a thicker blanket.

"We can stop tomorrow night anyway, I've got to pick some things up at Walmart," Harry mumbles and I nod, watching him as he moves his things around in his bunk. Our first show was only hours away, and I can't believe how far we've come. I think I knew what was happening, but I wasn't putting two and two together, I was just thinking of now. Here we are, getting ready in our bunks as I watch him. I can't believe he's done all of this for me, and I can't help but smile at the thought of him. His smile, his laugh, his everything has made me so intoxicated with him that I don't even know what to do anymore.

I know that I'm not exactly ready for a relationship, and god I know that but still I can't help but think of him in my future, and how much I want to be his. I don't know if he would want me to be his, but dear god I haven't felt something like this in so long.

I haven't felt anything like this since the summer we spent together.