ONCE UPON A TIME ✨

22. I love you

Elijah's pov :

"There she is" Eleanor said while pointing outside the car. I looked at the way she was pointing and i saw her. The person that i missed like hell, standing at the shore while looking up at the sky. I could only see her back, not her face. At this point, i was so nervous that i could feel the adrenaline rush in my stomach. What am i going to talk after not seeing her for almost a month?

"Dude, you okay?" Clint asked. I sighed and nodded softly. In my mind, i was already plotting the sentence that i am going to use when i talk with her. I never rehearse, even for once in my life, talking with someone in my brain before confronting them.

"Well, what are we waiting for? Lets attack her" Eleanor was losing her patience and opened the door to get down from the car without wasting any more time.

"Eleanor, wait. Um, i think i should talk to her first. She is probably here because she was feeling down. So the plan of yours to 'attack' her, might not work out" i explained. But the honest reason was that i really wanted to tell my true feelings towards Tasha and i didn't want either Eleanor or Clint to witness it. If i let Eleanor to confront Tasha first, then my whole plan will flopped.

"Yeah, whatever" Eleanor sat back in the car, rolling her eyes. I get down from the car with the help of Clint.

"Good luck, Elijah" he said while giving me a confident smile. I thanked  him and started to walk towards Tasha.

The nearer i am with her, the more the adrenaline rush in my whole body. I took a deep breath before i called her name to face me.

"Tasha"

I could see her body jerked a bit upon hearing my voice and she slowly turned in my way. And then i saw her face. The face of the girl that i had been missing alot. The face of the girl whom my love grew stronger and stronger day by day. Even though, she ignored me for days, i couldn't stop thinking about her. I coulnd't stop myself from being caring of her and trying to reach her as much as i could even though, i knew she would ignore. I couldn't stop myself from falling in love with her each and everyday i missed her.

Her face was a bit swollen, maybe from her crying, i guess. She was shocked to see me and her expression was unreadable. I could see her face forming smile for a second and then, for the next second, her eyes were starting to tear up. But, one thing that i could surely tell was she was missing me too.

"Elijah" she whispered. She looked at me from up and down and her eyes caught my arm sling. She started to sob harder and her voice trembled.

"I- im sorry.. I.. am so.. sorry" she said in between her crying. I could see her whole body shaking and she covered her face with her hands.

"This my fault. This is my fault" I heard faintly because she was talking with face covered. I opened my mouth to calm Tasha down but no word came out. It was as if the words i memorized in the car were lost after i saw her face. My brain might be not working right now because i had been longing to see her face for ages and now, after i saw her, my brain most probably freezed up.

Tasha was crying harder and harder and she was talking something in gibberish. I couldn't understand her at all. Suddenly, her body collapsed to the ground. For a second, i thought she passed out and i rushed towards her. I was getting panicked.

***

Tasha's pov :

"Elijah". I can't believe my eyes.  Standing in front of me was the man i really wanted to apologize for my own mistakes. He was hurted both pyhsically and mentally because of me and i hadn't tell a single 'sorry' yet to him. The man that i thought you was going to leave me because i kept avoiding him for no reason. But unlike other men, Elijah came to see me again. Despite all the stupid things that i had done to him, he came back to check on me. Oh, i don't deserve him.

"I- im sorry. Im so.. sorry" finally it came out of my mouth. Tears started to roll down on my cheeks and seeing his face made me to cry even harder. His face showed no angry or mad experessions at me. Instead, he looked at me with pity and i could tell that he had been missing me as well. I felt so embarassed to even look at me because of my mistakes and my ugly cry.

"Its my fault. You.. you dont deserve any of those things that happened to you. Im sorry for avoiding you. I couldn't bear the pain when i looked at you in that condition. You almost die because of me and i couldn't stop myself from blaming that on me. I don't know what i would have done if something more horrible happened to you that night. I regretted every moment of that and i.. i don't deserve you, Eli. You are a great guy and im.. im just causing you troubles. Im sorry.." i said in between my cry. I was not sure if Elijah heard any of that as i was covering my face with my hands but i felt like i just put down a huge burden that i had been carrying all these days. I knew he deserved more explanations from me but i couldn't continue anymore. It was just too painful to even think about.

I don't deserve him. I don't deserve him. That thought kept playing in my mind that i started to feel really guilty. My head was starting to get heavy and my knees were getting weak. I couldn't stand anymore because my hands, legs and whole body shaking a little bit. It was just a few seconds away before i collapsed to the ground because my legs were not supporting my body anymore. I felt to a sitting position and started to cry harder and harder. My whole body was shaking vigorously at this point.

"Hey, hey, its okay. Its okay.. " i heard Elijah's footsteps running towards me. He kneel down in front of me and wrapped his hands around me. His hug was so warm and comforting and i realized how much we had been missing each other. He hugged me so tightly that even if this world ends right now, he wouldn't let go of me. He put his chin on my head and stroked my hair gently while shushing softly.

Goshh, i miss his hug and the way he strokes my hair. Its like as if he is telling me that he would be there for me no matter what happen and he never ever would leave me and he would never stop loving me. Its very reassuring and i feel very safe and protected in his hug. I hugged him back tightly and cried in his chest. I kept muttering 'sorry' at him which he replied with 'its okay'. I didn't know for how long we stayed like that but i didn't want to let him go. Forever.

He pulled away from me slowly and wiped away my remaining tears. He helped me to get up and we sat on a bench where he adjusted my messy hair. I looked like a kid who just had fist fighting with other kids, my hair was so messed up and my face was a bit swollen because of the cry. I realized that he was adjusting my hair with one hand and i looked at his arm sling.

"How is your hand?" i asked slowly.

"Better" Elijah chuckled while looking at me carefully. The way he looked at me made me kind of uncomfortable because i looked like the most ugliest person on earth with my messy hair and swollen eyes.

"What?" i asked while sniffing.

"What what?" he asked me back with a confused look.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"I- nothing" he sighed. "I just.. missed you so much, Tash. I can't believe my eyes right now. Would you?" he straighten his other hand in front my face.

"What?"

"Would you pinch me so that i knew i am actually seeing you right now and this is not some sort of dream where i would be waking up later and be disappointed?" Elijah said in one breath. He had a huge smile on his face which explained that he was relieved and happy to see me.

"You are not dreaming, Eli" i laughed at him softly while wiping my nose and my face for the last time. The dry tears was mixed with my sweats which gave out a very unpleasant smell. I felt disgusted about myself. I didn't even realize that i was sweating so much.

After that, Elijah and I sat in a comfortable silence. There were a lot of things that i wanted to talk to him but i was scared that he might be mad or disappointed and he would left me. At least, before i say something to him, i wanted to appreciate this moment where he was actually there, sitting beside me, holding my hands and making me felt so calm and relieved inside. I looked at his side profile and i could see that he was thinking something. His eyes were focused to the kids who was playing and laughing. But, i knew that he was not looking at the kids, but he was thinking something very deeply.

"Eli, I- " i took a deep breath before i decided to apologize to him. After all, i was the one who made a lot of mistakes and Elijah deserved a ton of 'sorry's from me.

"I love you, Tash".