𝔩𝔬𝔳𝔢 | billie eilish

011

monday - november 9, 2020

𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐨'𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐥
𝐬𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝟑, 𝟏𝟏:𝟒𝟎𝐚𝐦
𝐥𝐨𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬

"Are you okay, though?" I murmur as I align my vision with her thighs that are shaking moderately.

"Yeah," she nods vaguely while her intimidating eyes are evidently piercing through me; as if she just dipped into my head, copied my thoughts and is now aware of my first impression of her. 

Her voice reverberates so broken yet so stern, as if it is supposed to build something such as a stout facade around her; an exterior wall that will lead only very few people through an iron door to her overly private thoughts and secrets.

Her hair isn't shining healthily, it's dry and streaky.

The dark circles beneath her fatigued eyes either indicate heavy sleep deprivation or oversleeping.

Her septum piercing is crooked.

And from less distance I distinguish the blemishes on her skin. It's reddened all over, not only due to the sweat on her forehead.

She appears subdued and socially withdrawn.

However, there's something special about her that's mentally pulling me into her embrace.

Her person doesn't seem to belong to the group of extraordinaries in this world, but what's it about her then that bemused me so much?

Maybe it's the fact that I'm gay and feel a slight attraction to every single girl that matches my type. Even if she just walks past me on the sidewalk. She won't fail to impress me for a fleeting moment.

So it's perhaps that case again right here, a momentary sensation that will leave my body within the next couple of hours.

According to her reactions after my attempts of talking to her, she is already fed up with my cordial demeanor and wishes to switch seats with somebody far away from my table.

That again makes me think about whether we have looked at each other with evil intentions before or if it's simply her moodiness that is the reason for her acting all snappy.

Have we approached each other before? Did I accidentally execute the memory of her existence from my mind?

That would easily solve all the questions in my head right now.

Or maybe I'm just analyzing and interpreting things into a situation that has never taken place before.

"Okay," I reply lowly and lean back in my chair with a sigh, trying to trick my head by telling it that she won't play a significant role in my future life anyway, so why would I waste another thought on her now when it's highly recommended that I should focus on my English class instead?

I turn my gaze away from the girl's face and concentrate on Mrs. Bailey's talking.

"In this year we're going to start off with book presentations that you're gonna work out with the person sitting next to you," she informs the class about the set plans for the upcoming weeks.