Once Eliyas dashed inside and noticed me, it didn't take him not even a split second before he snatched me from my coworker's arms, carried me between his arms like a wheat powder bag and started to issue one order after another to his surrounding."Drag her IV carefully".. "Clear the way" .. "Call an ambulance"
Feeling his strength, and being surrounded with his familiar yet strange warmth my heart had already started to calm.It is indeed unexplainable and out of the ordinary how certain people in our lives still bring us comfort no matter how we try to deny their importance and push them away from us.
It is exactly this way between me and my ex husband, and it always has been like this..
few months after our marriage i somehow came to realise that whenever i was facing problems i would unconsciously go cuddle to that man's side like a hurt kitten although i never complained to him about any of my difficult times, i'd squeeze my self under his arm and he would just encircle me and accept my strange behavior, never asking any question.
and i started to notice that man too often came to me for no particular reason.. Put his head in my lap and put my hand above his head akin asking me to softly tap on it.. And coincidentally i'd find out later that in those certain days he had trouble in work which i never asked about and he never mentioned.
We had mountains of pride between us when we were together.. Yet we only found comfort in one another in our bad times.
Such comfort.. Not even a separation would take it away.
After Eliyas put me carefully on the bed i finally started to gain back my consciousness fully, although the doctor tried to intervene and check on me yet Eliyas refused to move and made his job very difficult standing so close by my side.. It was for this reason that the first thing i noticed when i became wide awake was naturally Eliyas's face, looking rather sour and very troubled.
I somehow understand him, usually the one can read approximately the state of a patient based on his looks, but in my case i'd look on my death bed be it in a serious situation or for a sting of a bee.
I consulted so many psychologists along my life.. But ever since my miscarriage it seemed like my phobia only worsened. So i only try to cope with it for the time being.
I looked at Eliyas and said:
_"i'm fine, no need for an ambulance"
After that I addressed the administrative group who followed Eliyas inside the room as well saying:
_"sorry for causing you trouble.. You can continue your work, i'm fine"
_"what happened?" Eliyas asked in a rather harsh tone.
It wasn't the kind of tone you'd expect from the person who had just helped carrying you to comfort, but more like the tone of a detective who is investigating about a crime scene in which you are the number one suspect.
Needless to say it, all the comfort i had initially unintentionally felt had dissipated.
I replied as if it was not a matter that needed a question:
_"i'm here to receive treatment for headache and fatigue"
_" i know that already, what happened after that?"
He asked in an angry way again.
He knew that already?I looked at him skeptically.. Is it possible that he was there in the clinic because of me?
But i didn't have the time to justify nor think of his reasons for being there, because another realization had hit me. Eliyas was not only looking at me in the middle of his sudden investigation session .. But he was as well digging holes and aiming arrows at the poor innocent young employee who had accompanied me.
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