Greyson (Lightening Series Book One)

Chapter Thirty

Three weeks had passed since that day and myself and Grey were in a really great place. Thing were actually looking positive for a change and although it's not going to the standard I expected, I was still happy because he was trying.

We still hadn't confirmed if we were actually a couple or not and on my behalf it was sometimes confusing. Our parents were clueless because Grey didn't want to tell anyone, I kept teetering back to the idea of being his dirty little secret but I had too much hope that this time...that wasn't the case.

He had been flying back and forth for his tour, he always made sure that I woke up to him the next morning which definitely gave him bonus points. However on the same thought, he looked exhausted. I told him that he didn't need to fly back after each show but he simply halted my speech and nothing more of it was mentioned.

He was trying and for that I'm thankful but sometimes I feel like I'm losing the Grey I've always known. I like my dangerous Grey just as much as I like my sweet Grey. Right now, it's sweeter than a lollipop.

Was I complaining? Absolutely not. I loved his attention and affection, I loved our sweet love making and breakfast in bed. However, one of the reasons why I like Grey so much isn't due to his sweetness because before these past three weeks, I didn't think he was capable of that. It was the power, the dangerous glint in his eyes that turned me on to the point of stripping naked. The little threats and dominance that he knew I loved secretly but an outsider may think it was just plain awful.

That was me and Grey though. Both competitive, both stubborn as hell and both of us that crazy about each other that we kill people with our eyes just when they look.

Even the sex had changed. I could tell he was holding back and he always try's to make it as sweet as possible and whenever I urge him to change it up and be more rough, he has none of it.

Maybe it was because of what happened with Charlie but I'm fine now and he needs to realise that. I'm not a porcelain doll.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I snapped out of my trance looking up to Grey. He was standing shirtless and barefoot in nothing but grey sweatpants and by god did he glorious. His tattoos came to life as the rays of sun from our large kitchen windows beamed on them like a shining light.

"Nothing I'm fine." I smiled lifting up my coffee cup to my lips with a smile, "Good morning." I teased taking a sip of my coffee as he rolled his eyes.

It felt surreal to be waking up everyday and having breakfast everyday with Grey. This is something I dreamed about since I was a little girl when my thoughts would run wild. I never take a moment of it for granted, I wanted to wake up to him everyday for the rest of my life.

"Someone's awake this morning." He smirked. "Did you call the Doctor?" He added in, his playfulness away and replaced with a more serious tone.

He took stance at the other side of the kitchen island. I was sitting on a stool at one side and he was leaning down onto his arms against the countertop directly opposite me.

"No." I frowned, "Grey honestly I'm fine, half the time I don't even remember them." I shrugged taking another sip of my coffee.

I lied because I do remember them. Each night is the same, I go to bed and a few hours into sleep I have the same recurring dream of being held under water and not being able to get back up. So I lash out, I scream and sob...eventually waking up and gasping for air. I couldn't not remember them.

Sometimes I try to avoid sleep for as long as I can but that doesn't work either. Most of my nightmares are caused by the feeling of drowning and others, the more severe episodes are of finding Charlie in this house and I can't get away from him.