The Girl Who Lived

Waiting for Peace

February 17th, 1996
_________________

My mind was slow. These past couple of days I wasn't able to properly think. I didn't even care about anything Professor Umbridge had to say.

These few days have been unpleasant, boring, overall nothing.

I waited and waited for Fred to come and speak to me but nothing. He didn't even glance in my direction. I hated it, I hated him for not speaking to me. Everytime I try to go near him, he leaves, making up some bullshit excuse to his brother.

"Elena?" I turned to my left and saw Hermione walking towards me. "You alright?"

I crossed my arms, standing in front of the old photograph of the Order. I nodded, pulling a lazy grin to my lips. She sighed, setting her bag down.

It was Wednesday afternoon, near nightfall and training for the army was barely beginning.

Stupid Professor Umbridge made us stay an extra hour because apparently, we were lazy and were good for nothing. I wish I could be surprised but I wasn't.

"He loves you a lot, Lena." Hermione said behind me, looking over my shoulder to the picture.

I looked over my shoulder. "Who?"

Her face contorted in confusion. "Fred."

The simple sound of his name made my stomach turn in every way.

"I know, I know, 'Mione. I love him too-" I sighed, touching the necklace on my chest. "He pulled out a ring and I mean, Gods, I'm only fifteen! I don't want to get married now or maybe ever, y'know?"

Her face cleared and she nodded silently, waiting for me to keep speaking.

"I love him so much but imagine having something so good- so perfect and then getting handed a ring. That ring fucked it all up because as much as I love him, I do not want to be a wife now."

Hermione reached out and squeezed my shoulder tightly, grimacing slightly. She knew this already- she knew me and sighed.

My heart broke, a little piece of the corner, the moment I watched Harry, Ron and the twins walk in, laughing. Fred looked so happy- so carefree. From the lighting in here, his hair was lighter than ever, flaming red. I stood near the wall and hid my usual smile while I heard his laugh.

My breathing caught as his eyes landed on me and his laughing halted. I lowered my gaze, trying to bite back the words I wanted to say. If I could have my way, I would say to Fred, "I love you and if you want me to wear the ring, damn it then I'll wear it" but instead, I was silent.

Harry didn't speak to me either. He brushed past me without so much as a word and set his book down near Ron's things. Ron and George grinned towards Hermione and I and kept joking around with each other.

I gathered every ounce of courage I could and cleared my throat, raising my head to where Fred was lingering near the door, his face shadowed by his own thoughts.

"Fred," I said, choking down a soft cry. The last thing I needed was to lose him. My life could fall apart for all I cared, it already was, but if I lost Fred, what would I do?