Binding You To Me Like Cursive

Lost

Phoebe

Her breasts were full, luscious, and swollen in my hands as I ravaged her. Her pinkish-brown nipples were dime-sized. She tasted like sweet cotton candy and my hunger for her couldn't be satiated. Her hands pulled at my hair roughly but I didn't mind at all, I enjoyed her need for me. I wanted to taste her pussy but didn't want to push my luck, so instead I claimed her mouth, enjoying her small whimpers and moans.

"You need to go," she murmured between kisses as I started to taste her salty tears. She wasn't even sure what she wanted herself, that's why she was giving me the order. I could smell her sweet musky arousal leaking from her core and I was satisfied knowing she was so ready for me.

"I don't want to," I said, kissing her neck and feeling her body flush against mine. If I left, I wasn't sure when I'd see her again. Kiss her again. This was my risk, and I wasn't sure if I could risk it.

"Please, this is my home. I can't do this here, you don't know how bad I already feel." I'd seen her crying and was angry with myself. I couldn't console her the way I wanted. I wanted to give her my shoulder and hold her in my arms like she was mine and tell her everything would be okay. I knew she felt wrecked with guilt, and I didn't want to tell her to dump her fiancé although it was exactly what I wanted. I wanted her to myself. This was the most selfish I'd ever been. "Please, Bee." The nickname she gave me made me back off. My mother called me that. I picked up her shirt and slipped it over her head and held it open for her arms. I liked dressing her. I bit into my lip and gazed at her rubescent hot skin and swollen red lips. Her freckles were darker as a side effect.

I sighed, "fuck." I trusted my hands through my hair. She held my head, and brushed her thumb against my cheek. I leaned into her touch like I'd known her all my life. She felt safe, and I wanted to keep her. I felt she was mine. In my heart and in my gut everything was screaming: Winter. Another wet droplet fell onto my cheek. She wiped it off like it was nothing and pulled me into a hug. A genuine hug. I inhaled her scent. She reminded me of early spring. The blossoming flowers and fresh rain on the pavement from the night prior, the brewed hot chocolate I was always eager to make. "You're perfect for me," I whispered, gripping her body tighter.

When she pulled away she couldn't look me in my eye. She simply walked me to the door, kissed my hand, and closed the door. I shuffled home, unbeknownst of the dread I was look forward to in the upcoming weeks.

2 weeks later ~

My body ached as I pumped my legs and picked up my speed. I'd run 6 miles and I was afraid I'd still return home to find her balcony empty. She was in my dreams- practically in my every thought. She was gone but somehow still with me. I'd masterbated more times than I could count to her body and her sweet satisfying moans. But still, she wouldn't let me breathe. I ran to breathe now. When my thoughts and need completely clouded everything else; I ran. 2 weeks. The worst 2 weeks I'd ever lived. Sweat roved down my entire face and dropped from my nose and I couldn't even tell if I was crying.

Maybe.

I slowed to a stop and put my hands on my knees, heaving and coughing from my strenuous run. I found a garbage and released the contents from my stomach. My phone buzzed in my legging pocket and I pulled it out while wiping my mouth.

E.R- How about that 3rd date?

Worst timing ever, Ezra.

I agreed to a date last week. 4 days after she left. Ezra and I vibed, he was a sweet, charismatic guy and he could be funny. The looks were also there. I mean, if I'd met him before her I would have gladly bedded him, but now all I felt toward him was friendship. Plutonic. I didn't respond. I wanted to talk to him in person another day. I headed up my street and climbed into the elevator. My apartment was unkept, I'd been blowing off cleaning and cooking and I ordered out more frequently. I shed my clothes and got into the cold shower.

I wondered what she was doing right now? If she ever thought about me. If so, what? I pulled on my newer magenta Charmeuse satin robe that was the most beautiful color I'd ever seen. It was over expensive but I ended up going on a shopping spree, something I don't do often. I stepped into my living room and was acutely aware of something I couldn't see or hear but rather smell and sense. I ran out of my glass doors and seen her. Her beautiful skin glowed in the sunset and she was leaned over on the black railing, gazing out at the ocean. She didn't look happy, and that felt maddening and I was instantly filled with more guilt. Her dark eyes cast to mine and suddenly I could breathe again.