Anyone But Her

Aftershock

Lydia ran upstairs. She couldn't believe it. He was going on a date already? It had only been a few weeks and he was already over her. She ran to the bathroom, locking the door and sat on the cold floor against it. Everything was such a mess. Just thinking about Stiles on a date with another girl...her touching him, kissing him...it made her sick. The look he gave her downstairs made her stomach churn. It's like he couldn't even see her anymore like he just saw right through her, like she was invisible to him, and it made her unbelievably sad. Falling out with someone was one thing but them then pretending like you don't exist? It was agony.

Lydia stood up slowly but shakily as she took a glance in the bathroom mirror. God, she wasn't surprised that he'd found someone else. She looked revolting. She expertly wiped any fallen mascara from under her eyes so she didn't look as much like she'd been crying. Although, sometimes she wondered why she bothered, it's not like Jackson even noticed her or cared either way. Though he ignored her in a different way to Stiles, Jackson knew she was there but he just didn't care. As if she was just some annoying pest that he'd unfortunately had to learn to live with. Stiles, on the other hand, he ignored her like it hurt him to look at her, like looking at her would make him fall apart.

Lydia took one final long breath before unlocking the door and heading to Jackson's room. She felt so tired, she barely slept anymore, her mind racing with how things could have been different. She laid down on the uncomfortable hard mattress, bringing her knees up to her stomach as she silently cried. She knew Jackson wouldn't be back for a while yet so she took this chance to let some of her locked up emotions out.

2 and 1/2 hours later

Lydia woke up suddenly, her head hurting like she'd been out partying all night. She jolted up, her legs and arms uncomfortable as she realised that she must have fallen asleep. Jackson still wasn't back but she didn't care anymore, it gave her chance to have some more peace and quiet. Her hair itched her face as it fell in bouncy curls all around her. She grabbed a comb from her bag and gave them a little brush through, so she looked more put together before changing her t-shirt for a black oversized hoodie that came to her thighs, making her look like she wasn't even wearing shorts at all.

She began to head out of the room before she ran into Bella. Bella giggled upon seeing Lydia. "Hey cutie! I'm so glad you're back! How have you been? I feel like we didn't get to talk much at breakfast, how was grandma's?" Lydia questioned sweetly as she bent down to her height. Bella smiled as she clutched the new doll she was holding tighter. "It was really fun. We did lots of drawing and baking and she even gave me this dolly!" Bella replied excitedly as she hopped around a bit. "Oh that's wonderful Bella! So what have you named her?" Lydia asked trying to sound happy. "I named her after you! She's called Lydia! She's beautiful just like you!" Bella said sweetly as Lydia felt like crying. "Oh gosh sweetie that's the kindest thing ever! Thank you, I'm honoured!" She smiled genuinely at he little girl, booping her nose softly and making her laugh.

"Well I am super jealous of you, you sounded like you had way more fun than I did these last couple of weeks..." Lydia trailed off just thinking about everything that has happened in those weeks. All the times she'd spent with Stiles. Bella gave her a questionable look, noticing her sad expression. "Lydia are you-" Bella began to talk but they were interrupted as they heard the front door open and close loudly, as happy whistling filled the house.

Stiles was back home.

He sang a delightful "hello" to Mrs Whittmore before heading up the stairs. He stopped dead in his tracks upon noticing Lydia at the top of the stairs. But before he could say anything he was quickly greeted by Bella as she came running over to him to give him a big hug. His then vacant and almost unreadable expression soon changed to a happy and excited one as he picked Bella up with ease, swinging her around to her delight before resting her on his hip. "Woahh there Bell, you nearly knocked me back down the stairs!" He joked with her as she giggled back still clutching her doll.

"Hold on a second something is different...nope don't tell me don't tell me...you got a new doll didn't you?!" He said with a questioning look on his face that made Bella erupt with excitement. "Yes yes Grammy got me a new dolly!!She cheered as she showed to him. He held it looking at it all over. "Well I have to say that that is the best darn doll I've ever seen! she's very lucky. What's she called?" He asked her with a loving smile. "She's called Lydia! I named her after her because she's so pretty! I want to be as pretty and beautiful as her one day!" Bella beamed as she pointed back at Lydia behind her, drawing his attention to her. Lydia blushed hard as Stiles furrowed his bros slightly, his smile faltering, before his expression became unreadable. "Oh I see...well I'm sure you will be Bel." He said like she'd thrown him off completely

Bella then cocked her head, like a puppy, in confusion. "Hahaha wait you mean I'm lucky ya big silly, not the doll!" She shouted back at him and laughing as she did so. He gave the doll back to her before placing her back on the floor softly. "No Bell, that Doll is lucky to have you cause you're the best darn person I know." He beamed at her and played with her hair slightly as she stood next to his leg. His attention suddenly turned back to Lydia his smile dropping instantly once more. Lydia almost felt like she was imposing and wasn't supposed to be there. "...oh erm h-hi..." she stuttered quietly to him, expecting him to just ignore her, like he always did but this time was different.

The air was thick with tension as he seemed to be studying her face and looking everywhere except her eyes. She noticed how he quickly glanced down at what she was wearing, his eyes lingering a little too long on her bare legs before he spoke. "Hi." Stiles replied bluntly which took Lydia by shock that he even replied at all. She moved her gaze from the floor to his eyes hastily as he spoke as if she was surprised that he was even talking to her at all and not someone else.  "Oh erm...so...did your...d-date go okay?" She asked him hesitantly, slightly expecting him to rage at her, but she knew that he'd never do that in front of Bella. She felt awkward even asking him that.

His gaze suddenly met her eyes as she spoke, as he was confused on why she'd even mention it at all. Lydia studied his face, noting the slight stain of red lipstick upon us bottom lip. She felt a pang of jealousy that he'd kissed his date but she pushed it away. It wasn't her place anymore. He didn't want her, he'd pushed her away. He put his hands in his pant pockets in slight frustration. He couldn't understand his feelings for Lydia anymore. Despite it all, he couldn't help but want her, but think she was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen.

"Yeah erm it went good...it was really great...she was...erm...just really...great." He struggled to speak. It felt too awkward, repeating his words, he didn't know what to say, he could see his sentence physically impact Lydia as her eyes became glazed over and tearful and her mouth was open slightly. "Oh..." she said almost half to herself. She was praying that he'd hated it, that she was horrible, but she knew that wouldn't have ever happened. She quickly realised her mistake and carried on speaking. "Erm that's really...err...that's good. I'm really h-happy for you." She lied through her teeth but a part of her wanted it to be true. She should be happy for him. He was the smartest, kindest, most caring and loving boy she'd ever met and he deserved the world. She just wish she could give it to him. But she wasn't enough. And she knew that from the start, he deserved someone better.

Silence consumed them once more and with a thin awkward smile Stiles said his goodbyes to Bella and headed up to the next flight of stairs to his room. Lydia sighed. She finally felt like she could breathe again. Bella walked up to her, grabbing her hand and pulling her down to her level. "Are you alright Bel-" Lydia was about to ask but Bella cut her off. "You and Stiles. You're different. I can see it. I can tell." Bella spoke softly as if perplexed by what she had just seen. Lydia was taken aback that this little girl would even notice but she played it cool. "Err...what do you mean Sweetie? Nothings changed. We're the same old Stiles and Lydia." She said cheerfully but failed at convincing the little girl.

"No! You're both different. I can see that, it's obvious cause you're both so so sad. Even him. He's just better at pretending than you." The little girl stated honestly before skipping off to her room to play. Lydia stumbled slightly, her knees nearly giving way. How was this little girl so observant at 7 years of age? She got all that just from a 5 second conversation? And what did she mean? That he was faking being happy better than her? Was he lying about his date being good? Who knows. Lydia was lost in her thoughts for awhile, looking up at the next set of stairs that led to Stiles' room. She hated how things had become so complicated but at least today was better.

Today he actually acknowledged her again.