Save Me - clifford (a.u.)

26

Dani

Going back to school was rough.  No one looked at me the same.  It was like before, everyone looked at me like I was the problem, and now everyone looked at me like I was the victim. Everyone looked at my with this weird sympathy that made me uncomfortable.  On the other hand, my relationship with Michael was pretty good now.  He has not only become the most amazing boyfriend, but also my best friend.  After that night at Michael’s, we got together every single day left after the break.  Sometimes just for coffee and a movie.  Other times for other things.  He has been my rock in my mom’s healing process.  He comes over sometimes and helps me take care of her.  She can now walk and go up and down stairs without help which is a massive achievement considering when she got home she could barely lift a mug of tea. She now loves Michael very much and treats him like her son.  She always asks him how school is, and how his mum is and if he wants to stay the night.  He usually doesn’t but there have been occasions where he is here until close to midnight and my mom forbids him from taking the subway home alone.

It was nice.  It was as if everything was fixing itself once again.  But something odd has been happening lately.  Michael never takes me over anymore.  He usually just avoids his house all together which is why he is at mine so often.  Frankly, I just wanted to make sure him and his mum were alright considering how Michael told me how close they were.

So I decided to go to his house and talk to his mom while he was at band practice with the boys.  Of course he didn’t know, but I don’t think he would mind.

I knocked on his door and his mum opened it and smiled.

“Hi, Dani.  Is Michael with you?” She asked scrunching her eyebrows together.

I shook my head “I came to talk to you.”

She nodded slowly as if she understood why. Did she know why, though?

“Well please come in.” She said stepping behind the door and letting me come in.  I thanked her.

I quietly took off my shoes and placed them neatly on the mat.

“Here, hun, I’ll take your jacket.” She said taking my jacket from my arms after closing the door.  I walked to the kitchen

“Can I get you anything? Tea? Coffee?”  She asked.

“Sure, coffee sounds good. Thank you Ms. Clifford.” I said politely.

“How do you take it?”

“Milk and 1 sugar.” I smiled.

“So where is Michael?”

“Band, I think.”

“He hasn’t been home in 2 nights, told me he was with you.  Is that true.” I felt guilty for taking her son from her comfort.

“Yes.  We have a spare room, and after school he’s been coming over to do homework and helping with my mom.”

“Oh how is your mom?” She asked bring the coffee to the kitchen table where I was seated.  She pulled out a chair that made a rather screechy noise that sent my spine on ice.

“Well umm, she’s going back to work in 12 days, she’s alright on stairs and can walk better now.  Just the broken ribs that are an issue at night sometimes.” I admitted.  Michael and his mum both had green eyes, but I felt hers were colder towards me than his.

“That’s good.” She smiled, and that’s when I truly noticed.  She doesn’t like me.  I am an expert in receiving vibes from people. The way she pursed her lips before her smile, the way her eyes didn’t warm when she smiled.  What did I do?

“Yea.  So I just came over to ask if everything is alright between you and Michael, because he’s been over a lot and I just know that he and you are close.”

“Well of course, considering I did give birth to him.  Considering I work every day to put food in his stomach.” She replied coldly. Oh no.

“Yea, and just that you and him seem almost like friends.  A connection I wish I had with my mom to be honest.” I admitted.

She narrowed her eyes. “Is that why you insist on pulling him away from me in every possible way?” She asked. 

I raised my eyebrows, shocked at how blunt she was. “Well I don’t think I understand...” I began.

“I don’t want you dating my son.” She said looking down at her mug.  I opened my mouth but couldn’t move it to form words.

“I beg your pardon.” I asked rapidly blinking.

“I don’t think I said anything that didn’t make sense, Dani.” She said pursing her lips.

“I think you did.  Why don’t you want my dating your son all of a sudden?” I asked leaning into the table.

“Well to be honest I don’t think he’s safe around you and your family at all.  One day, your father is going to get out of prison and I don’t want my son associated with a girl that comes from a toxic family.  It’s not good, and after the incident it’s not safe.  Please understand this from a mother’s perspective.” She said coldly.  I felt hot tears swell in my eyes.

“My family is toxic?” I demanded.

She was taken aback. “Are you saying that Michael and I are toxic?”

“No I’m saying that you are.  The very first time I came over, there was no food in the fridge, when Michael and I wanted to make dinner.  That’s toxic.  You actually have the nerve to try and break up your son and me, because you don’t believe that he is safe? Are you kidding me? He’s not safe living here.”

She sharply exhaled. “Do you realize that he smokes now? Yup, right in his room.  Every time I smell it, I’m reminded that if he didn’t get involved with you he wouldn’t be killing himself.”

“Michael smoking is his choice.”

“He’s underage, technically I can call the cops and he can get charged.  He’s 17, he’s not an adult yet.  Nothing is fully his choice, not even you.  Yet he insists on keeping you around, tries convincing me that there’s more to you than I see.  Well one day, when you break his heart, I have to pick up the pieces.”

I stood up and pushed the chair back with my calves.

“You, have no right to ruin our relationship, okay.  He loves me and I love him.” I said pointing and feeling tears rush down my face.

She sarcastically laughed. “You kids, you think you know what love is.” She continued to laugh and shake her head. “I want Michael to be happy, and I know that happiness isn’t with you.  So he can continue to come over, and you can continue to be “in love” but when you dump him realizing that he’s not a prince, I will be sure that he will never come back to you”

I shoved my feet into my shoes and tore my jacket off of the railing. “You can’t see that he really is a prince to me.  Fuck you.” I said slamming the door.

I walked into the elevator and began to cry.  I called Michael.

“Hellooo.”

I sobbed into the phone.

“Dani? Are you crying? Are you okay?”

“I came to talk to your mom.” I sniffled.

“You did? Why? What did she say?”

“She told me to stay away from you.”

And there was a silence on the phone. “I know.”

“I’m sorry, I’ve made a mess.  I don’t want to let you go, but Michael if you think that you really are in danger being with me, than I think we should end it.” I sobbed more.

“I’m not in danger, Dani. I love you.”

“But Michael, your mom.  I don’t want to be the reason you break your connection with her.”

“But Dani, don’t you see? I don’t care.” I walked out of the elevator and into the station and sat on the bench.

“What do we do?” I asked wiping my eyes and leaning my head back.

He sighed. “I don’t know