Biker roots

Chapter 33 - Secrets

The drive back passes in silence while Rover holds my hand. A million thoughts are racing through my mind. Who is he? Why didn't he say the truth? My train of thoughts is stopped by Rover. "What happened Love?" he asks. I look outside the window. Do I tell him the truth? But what is the truth?

Rover senses that I am not ready to talk to him yet. "If you ever want to talk about it, I am right here." I look up at him, without him I would be so lost. "I know, thank you for going with me." I reply. Rover looks lost in thought, as if he is debating whether or not to tell me something. I softly place my hand over his on my thigh.

Rover breaks the silence after a while. "I need to tell you something, I have known Felix for a long time." Rover says. I look at him. Before he can continue I start. "Felix is part of the bone collectors. Isn't he?" I say. Rover looks a bit surprised at me. "How did you know?" He asks. "There was a guy at the funeral, Bullet wearing a bone collector vest. He greeted Felix with the name Bones."

Rover squeeze my hand. "He has never told you about it?" he asks. "No, as far as I know he is just an average guy, who loves to ride a motorcycle." I answer as I think back to the moment we met. "Did he ever tell you why he was here?" Rover carefully asks. "No, why?" I ask. "Something is off about all this, it's too much off a coincidence." "The only thing he told me was that something bad had happened back at home and he needed to stay away for a while and keep a low profile." I answer.

"Felix's father killed my parents." Rover suddenly says. I look baffled at him. I see the hurt in Rover's eyes. "I am so sorry Rover." I want to wrap my arms around him to comfort him, but I can't it's to dangerous since we are driving. "Don't, he has paid the price for it." He says with a cold look in his eyes. "Thank you for being honest with me." I reply. "I don't want to keep things from you." He answers with a small smile.

He really has listened to everything I have told him. He cares as deeply about me as I about him. That much is clear. But I need to tell him about the letter, I just am not ready yet. For once I want peace in my live, I need to process the death of my parents before I can face this storm.

"I need some time to process things, when I am ready I will tell you what's bothering me." I answer after a while. "I know, I love you." He replies. My mind wanders back over the last few days, Felix's father is responsible for the death of Rover's parents. And then I realize something. "Rover, it took a lot from you facing Felix." I say. "Yeah it did." He responds.

Rover did all this to support me, when I needed him the most. I need to tell him clearly how I feel, how much I appreciate everything he has done for me so far. "I never felt anything like this between us Rover." My voice is soft as I say those words. "I know, love. Me neither." Rover replies. "It scares me. Without you I can't think or breath. I love you so much it hurts." I add. He pulls the car over and as I look at him he takes my hand.

The way he is staring at me, leaves goosebumps over my body. "I can't live without you Alex. Your my whole world and seeing you hurting it just kills me." He says. "With you be my side I know I will get through everything. Your my light beacon in the darkness." He adds. He kisses me with so much love, tenderness and passion. It feels as if the whole world spins around me and fades into oblivion as it's just the two of us.

As we arrive back at the compound Ranger is waiting for me. I run out of the car into his arms. He holds me tight against his chest. "Baby girl, I am so sorry." He whispers in my hair. I cry again hot and heavy tears against his chest. I can hear all the guys coming out. Rover wraps his arms around my waist. Boulder wraps his arms around us, and one by one the guys all do the same.

"We can never replace what you have lost, baby girl. But you are part of this family." Rangers warm voice whispers in my hair. I smile trough my tears. We walk back inside to the bar.

Boulder pours us all a glass. Ranger raises his glass. "To Alex's parents, they did a fantastic job. May there finale ride be in peace. They will forever live on in our hearts and in my beautiful daughter Alex." Ranger salutes the sky. All riders raise their glass in silence. I nod and we all down our beverage.

We sit at the bar for a while, drinking and talking about my parents and the club. At some point Rover grabs my wrist. "Love, please stop it you have been scratching your scar the whole ride over and even now you haven't stopped." He says. Tears stream down my face, I want it gone. I don't want to have a constant reminder of the most horrible person in history, my mother. The reason my parents are dead, I want it gone. Ranger looks at me, concern in his eyes. "What's wrong?" he asks. And then I pour it all out again. "I want it gone, it reminds me of her. How I lost everyone and everything because of her." I say between tears.

Rover pulls me against his chest. And I cry again, I need to stop crying I need to man up. I just can't stand the tears anymore. "I'll make a call, baby girl. We'll get it covered with some nice ink." Ranger says and he smiles at me.

My father held his promise, a couple of days later his personal tattoo-artist came by the club. My father left us in his office and I poured my heart out to this complete stranger. He listened carefully and started drawing something. As soon as he was finished I knew this was what I wanted.

Hecarefully inked me, it stung a little. But I was glad it did. For some time ittook away the pain in my chest, the hurt and the grief. As I am standing infront of the mirror Rover's fingers glide over the Tattoo that decorates mywhole arm. The movements sent tingles over my body as he traces the thin linesof the henna pattern of the tattoo. "You are so beautiful love. I will see tooit that you are never hurting like this again. I promise, for now oneeverything will get better." He seers my lips with a hard passionate kiss.