Valentina - [wlw]

twenty eight

[audio serves its purpose well in this chapter.. replay if you need to <3 it's a cozy desolate vibe, I play it before bedtime or while im cleaning the kitchen because it fits perfect for fall/winter]

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Three days later...
Evie's view:

Two whole days.

It's been two days since I last saw Valentina. Two days since I last got to lay my eyes on her perfect skin complexion and alluring eyes. Two days since our fight.

I cried every night since and today was now day three.

I decided to take a small leave of absence for my mental health, just enough time to collect my thoughts and gather the general idea of how I was going to apologize to Valentina.

Right now Sophia was at school and Addie was at work. Me, I'm currently all alone at home waiting for my cinnamon buns to be done baking in the oven.

I lit a few of my candles in hopes it'd calm down my anxiety and relax me a bit more. The scent of my coffee brewing and warm fresh cinnamon bread rising, waiting for it to be slathered in homemade vegan icing was also enough to help the scattered mess of what I felt like on the inside.

Once I dropped Sophia off at school I came straight home, meditated, showered and began baking. It was my way of coping with a sense of loss and disparity.

It was how I learned to cope with my Aunts death at first and even now many years later.

Our apartment smelled so wonderful I could feel my mood lifting just a tiny bit.

But it wasn't enough to fill that void of longing for the woman I claimed to be the love of my life. Though my actions the other night seemed to disprove that statement and it just made me even more angry with myself.

I ruined my relationship. I broke that wall of trust that Valentina likely worked so hard to build. Remembering back to our late night conversations during our trip, she told me she had her doubts at wanting to love again before and while we were together. Valentina was worried it wouldn't work out because no matter what caused the pain in the relationship, she was just afraid of getting hurt again. In the end I proved her doubts to be true.

I hurt her. I hurt myself.

The ding on my sunflower shaped timer went off scaring me a little bit, enough to make me jump.

I grabbed the oven mit nearby and pulled the dark round skillet out of hot stainless steel oven. Setting it up top on the stove so the contents inside could cool down.

It was nearly past twelve, well past lunch.
Sophia didn't get out until three so I slipped on my ankle boots and stepped out back in our small backyard area. My feet crunching on the last bit of leaves that were on the ground from the weird type of winter we have here in Texas.

The backyard is little but cozy and comfortable. I keep my own garden back here where I plant vegetables and fruits seasonally.

Sophia has even seemed to take an interest in wanting to help me out here. But for now she just watches from the porch or through the sliding glass doors with the biggest smile. Waiting for me to come inside and show her what I picked.

Though her love for creativity and design is there. Sophia is very much a nature lover like myself. We've gone on walks the past two days, mostly for my sake.

It helps me clear my head and it helps her run off that extra energy before bedtime.

She likes to bring her chalk to draw sometimes. She loves picking flowers and pretending she's getting married. Her imagination was endless during these walks. It made me forget, even just for a few minutes.. about everything that was making me feeling so melancholic.