Accepting what I cannot

Sitting in the shower with my friends

Talented show girls are the same as magazine cut outs

Her voice will never come out of my mouth

Dreams of becoming a ballet dancer

Came true but only after the cancer

And as I sit in the shower with my new best friend

My soul tries to settle and make amends

Not my fault and I'll hear it again

Till they realize I am not a God send

I'm a knife I want deep in my thigh

That wants to stab a back so I let it be something else of mine

Butterflies turn my stomach acidic

Thinking of nostalgia going out of business

My Toy store it's an Amazon order

Must be heaven for every hoarder

They snapped the giraffe's neck to make him shorter

Replaced him with a fancy boat motor

Just so billionaires can ride to secret planets

And cannibalize children in their fancy mansions

And they'll breed just to have a brand new toy to fuck

Cuz Melania's getting old but her daughters pretty young

Well he Found out Melania's was a product of his

So he kept going with it cuz he's Already in deep shit

Makes it worse cuz he's already hated

Selling his personal helicopter with his ego deflated

That's my mini rant about capitalist pigs taking away toys R us

It's time to throw away those happy memories  broken bits of my childhood were crushed

And I cannot cry in front of you

I want to show you everyone that I am but what if you leave too

If it's meant to happen it's inevitable

But I am not lucky nor am I invincible

Thought bows and arrows were good self defense

Still every ugly part of me still made it through the fence

Stingers could keep the predators at bay

All I have to offer is a battered brain

I proved Freud wrong by refusing cinnamon and consuming honey

Yet I'm still angry at the sky for being too sunny

Fuck daddy issues I would stomp on my father

Tell him maybe it wouldn't end like this if he hit a bit softer

Need two therapists to live in my ears

So they can explain why I put in a bullet Inside In attempts to educate my peers

I'll challenge a truck on the interstate screaming "daddy it's your fucking fault

Shoulda shown me Epstein's vault

Cattle, money, any violence

That's how you get to a private island

But fuck You, you never even made it there... "

And My sentence comes to a blunt end after a blare

One day you may wake up to tell me it's a dream

Just to scream at me about your grass being anything but green

At least that's what I think but  it's that thought that keeps tapping at the window

He said let me go or prepare to be widowed

I want you with your heart still beating

I don't want to be the only who's capable of bleeding

I have watched men mourn their wives

Promising they'll meet them in the afterlife

But just like us all he is quite unsure

So he'll say what he can to comfort her

He holds her hand says goodnight

And it's the last she hears of him before she dies