road trip of a lifetime

chapter twenty-three

We had stayed quiet in the sofa with Markus for a while when my phone rang. 

It was Tara. Finally. 

"I need to take this," I said jumping out of the couch and running to my room. 

"Hey, are you okay?" she said as soon as I answered the call. 

"I'm fine really," I told her.

I had got too many "how are yous" today and they really started to piss me off. 

"Okay, so tell me everything, and by everything I mostly mean the parts that include you and Charlie, and well kissing," she ordered from the other end of the phone. 

"Sorry to disappoint, but I don't remember anything about that," I laughed. 

"Too bad," she sighed. "Now you have to do it again," she then informed. 

"Yeah, I guess," I mumbled. 

"What was that?" she catch my sigh. 

"Nothing," I tried to save the already lost situation. 

"Oh you like him, don't you!!!" Tara was now getting excited. I could imagine her jumping around her room. 

"Yeah. No. I don't know, it's not that simple," I stuttered. 

It really was a puzzle and I didn't know if I could figure it out. I mean there was Charlie who had made butterflies fly around my stomach since I met him. The time at the lake and their apartment also kinda gave me a feeling he wanted something more than just friends. Then again he was such a good friend. 

But then there was Owen. Owen had really become one of my best friends, but lately I had started to see him maybe even bit more. I mean he made me feel safe and warm and I didn't need to think about what I said or did in his company, I just could be me. And that was amazing. 

But I couldn't make the decision. Now and maybe never. I just didn't want to lose either of them. And then there was also the fact that Owen didn't probably even like me like that. 

"Of course it is simple!!" Tara  shouted to the phone. 

"How, how it is simple?" I was very curious how she could see the situation so easy. 

"You just gotta choose the one your heart wants, the one you can't stop thinking about... And then tell him!" she said more seriously. 

And she was right. 

"Yeah, I guess," I sighed. 

"Soo?" she asked. 

"Omg"

"Sorry"

"I'm just gonna go now, bye"

"You promise to tell me how it goes?"

"Yeah"

"Good, bye"

I hang up and walked back to the living room. Markus was still on the couch. 

"I need to go somewhere," I told him, grabbed the car keys and walked out of the door. 

I was going to do this now. I was going to go there and tell him. 

The whole drive my heart was pounding like crazy and I felt so scared. What if he didn't feel the same or had someone else? How could I ever get over that?

And what if he actually felt the same way? What was going to happen then? I mean I was leaving this week. TO FINLAND. which wasn't exactly close to Canada. I really didn't know if I could do a long-distance right from the beginning. When has that ever worked?