Maybe It Was Meant To Be (A Marianas Trench Fanfic)

Chapter 15

Matt left as soon as the movie ended, giving me a kiss on the forehead and a soft hug before. Josh got home soon after that, maybe fifteen minutes or so. He came to the bedroom immediately.

“Hi babe,” he stepped over to where I sat on the bed, “How’d it go?”

“It was really nice, actually,” I thought it over a moment. Our little ‘fake-sibling bonding time’. Surprisingly, seeing Matt was a lot easier than I imagined it to be. Maybe that’s how easy seeing everyone else would be. I hope so.

“Really?” his eyes brightened. There it was. That was the first time he’d looked at me since it happened without that sad look in his eyes. He didn’t look worried about me, even if it was just for the moment. And I loved it.

“Yeah, I think he really helped,” I shifted in the bed.

“What’d you guys do?” he sat down and put his arm around me.

“We just talked for a while and he made me laugh a few times. That was nice,” I paused and relived those moments, “And then we watched ‘Mean Girls’.”

He chuckled, “Sounds like a good start for seeing people again, eh?” He smiled, squeezing my shoulders gently. Even that hurt my already bruised arms though. I wondered how long it would take for them to heal.

I nodded, “I’m glad you started me out with seeing Matt. He was a great person to start with. He made it really easy. Or normal, I guess,” I said. For the week leading up to today, I’d just been working myself up thinking of all the bad things that could happen when seeing people other than Josh again when in reality it was just the people who love me the most wanting to be there for me.

“Do you think you’re ready to see the rest of the gang yet?” his eyes brightening again. I wish I was well enough to keep his eyes that bright—to keep him from worrying about me. 

“I guess. I mean, maybe. We’ll see,” I sighed, anxiety filling me again. I began to remember why I was so worried before. What if everyone’s like that? What if they all want to hurt me? I bet they all hate me. I don’t think I can see anyone more; just Josh and Matt. That’s all I really need, right? My boyfriend and my best friend. That’s all I need.

I think he could tell I was going down again, because the worry came back in his eyes—it went through his whole face, actually. That just made me feel even worse.

“Ariana, I love you. But I can’t stand to see you cooped up in this apartment for the rest of your life. I know you think you can, but it’s not healthy. It’s creating even more problems than I thought it would. You can’t just only see Matt and I forever, okay? I’m gonna invite Britt over,” he said. My emotions quickly flicked from sad and worried to rage. He picked up on that rather quick; “For you. I’m doing this for you. I need to see you happy again.”

“You don’t understand how scary this is for me,” I mumbled, my temper turning for the worse.

Josh pulled his phone out of his pocket, not taking his eyes off me. My blood was beginning to boil.

“Josh, stop.”

He started dialing the number and put the phone to his ear before sighing and dragging his feet out of the bedroom. I looked across the room to the mirror and saw the angry, sad expression on my face. Still tangled hair framed my face, there were bags under my eyes, I had no makeup, and it was obvious I’d lost weight. My cheek bones were much more defined; my arms more slender. I looked eerily similar to a skeleton.

I heard Josh’s voice, muffled through the walls.

“Yeah, Brittany. She really needs you,” he paused for a moment before continuing to talk, “She’s so skinny. I don’t know what to do. She needs you. She doesn’t know it, but she needs you.”