Strings (1 of 2)

Chapter 51 - Waking Up Alone

[Emily's POV]

I fucked up. I know I fucked up the second the house's front door slams behind me.

Shit! Why did I react like that?

I was so busy trying to make sure he didn't find out about my past mistakes, that I potentially ruined the good thing we have going. 

Why would I say he doesn't know me or need to know me?

It's true, I guess, in a way. He doesn't really know me beyond surface level trivia and in bed. But he didn't deserve to have that thrown back in his face.

The more I fought back, the angrier he got, and the less I wanted to tell him - the less I felt like I could. How do I tell him about my past without him judging me? There is no good way to tell him who Cory was to me.

If he knows the truth, he'll leave me and whatever this is. I can feel it in my gut. I'm enough of a mess already to add this to his view of me.

I pause with my hand on the door handle, ready to open it and apologize for being so harsh, but I hear him huff and his footsteps fade away as he leaves to find his motorcycle down the street. I made him park there while my parents were home and he drove my car.

I could call him and tell him to come back.

I stare at his number in my phone, my finger hovering over the call button.

Maybe I should let some time pass first. Maybe we both need time to ourselves to calm down and think this through.

I sigh and slide my phone back in my pocket and head upstairs to my bed.

---

I waited for Nathan to text me all night.

He didn't.

I shouldn't be surprised, I don't deserve a text. He shouldn't have to grovel to me. I was the crazy one.

In the morning I wake up miserable. Not only from our fight, but also from barely sleeping. We haven't slept apart in weeks now... I didn't realize it would be that hard.

Usually I wake up the same way I fell asleep - his arms around me and his face and deep breathing in my hair. Today I woke up alone and cold. Nothing about it made me want to do it again.

After showering and grabbing a banana from the kitchen, I make my way to sit beside the pool and put my feet in the water. It's refreshing, the water warmed by the sun shining above.

I press the call button on my phone and hold it to my ear as it dials. As it rings, I splash my feet in the water to distract me.

On the third ring, he picks up.

"Emily," he drawls out my name and some of the weight on my chest lifts when I hear his voice.

"Nathan..." I reply and we are both silent for a moment, waiting for the other to speak first, but neither of us do.

Finally I decide to break the silence and ask the question I called to ask.

"Can we do something tonight? I need to talk to you about yesterday." I keep my tone even, not too beg-y, even though if he says no it will crush me right now.

"I already had an idea, actually. 7ish?" He says and I smile instantly. I hear muffled voices around him talking. "But I have to go now, I'm buying a car." He adds quickly and I almost drop the phone in the pool in shock.

"Buying a what?" I repeat, my mouth hanging open.

"I'll pick you up at 7." He chuckles and hangs up.

What the hell? I never expected him to be a car-guy... the motorcycle suits him so well - even if I won't get on it anymore since the nightmare.

I climb up and head upstairs to write some of my story before I have to get ready for whatever he has planned tonight. I have no idea what he has planned. It could just be to his apartment... maybe the beach... he didn't give any indication. 

No matter what it is, I know it cannot get worse than yesterday and that already lifts my earlier miserable spirits.

Author's Note:

Quick chapter to set things up for Ch 52 - I was going to have it all in one but it got too long.

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