Forgiveness

Life choices

"would you forgive me if i broke another one?"
This wasn't what he had thought about when his sensei spoke them.
Sasuke stood facing the village in front of him the breeze dancing with his hair and he wanted it to lift his body and throw it away in another life where there is only butterflies and rainbows
Where his biggest mistake was breaking a plate
In one of those fairytale his wife read
He looked behind him and up to that huge window where Kakashi was
Sasuke doesn't know why he thought kakashi would be watching him, he was wrong he was giving another one an order in a blink of an eye
He would choose someone's fate and then work on someone else, he kind if hoped Kakashi was worried about him but he gave him options as if it was better than the orders he gives
"It's up to you"
Sure..
But that last thing he wanted was to fight for these people, this piece of earth that had for once agreed  on something was the fate of his clan
Criminals
He wanted to spit those words into everyone's face
How was he going to tell her without mentioning the war?
Kakashi had told him that he was supposed to be with the anbu to protect those who planned for all of this, who planned for his clan's fate and his
Humiliating!
He hated stepping there standing like one of their servants sacrificing his own life for theirs
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"Onee-sama, do you remember nejinisan used to like your smiles with stained face"
But she couldn't form one now it was hard her lips were tight if she smiles she think it will rip her face
"Smile"
But she's tired
"I would be happy if you do"
Are you?
Would those byakugan he had reached her from wherever he was?
One thing she will make sure of that she would make her last days worth living
"We only have this chance to live only this chance to see these people around us
So imagine that someone had risked their lives to give us a chance to live pr worse imagine that we're living one that we hate"
"You're a different person, who has different features, different thoughts different paths and opinions you're a human who has every right like the others even the hokage so don't make someone else's choice paint you draw your path"
Every passing second will pass time won't wait for her to make choices and if she kept being her that would lead her to nothing but guilt, regret and sadness she hated regrets even though she thought that she deserved it
The door of the house slide open harder than usual her feet took her to the sound
"think"
The tapping of her steps got lighter and her eyes focused on the floor
"will you regret it?"
The sound of her steps died, would she regret taking these steps she can't take them back
She was hesitating
"make a choice"
What would she do? Question gathered in her small head replaying her life choices making her frozen in her spot fear took all over her what if she regret this? Though (this) was still unknown but for her it meant every passing seconds what if she regretted, a mixture of regret and fear heaved her ribs she wanted to puke
"nothing but a failure"
She could hear steps that wasn't hers coming towards her but hinata hesitated to look up what if she regret this?
Hinata had killed someone because of her life choices
"nothing but a failure"
The intruder stared in confusion she held this creepy shocked face as if someone was strangling her, she wasn't herself these past weeks she even was absent from home for hours in their days
Where was she going?
He narrowed his eyes at her she didn't flinch
She had zoned out.. again he swallowed the argues to open her head and see what was happening in there.. to where her thoughts take her she was pale, distance and spacing out most of the time he had heard glasses shattering many times, curses whenever she stare at one of the corner, the clenching of her jaw sometimes she would walk out of the door fast to their backyard and scream quietly through her gritted teeth he was aware of all that and since when?
Since that lovely dinner she has with the yamanaka, and the girls, did she knew about what was happening in another town this long?
Hinata was upset, sad sometimes he questioned her sanity
He always wondered what was the reason sasuke has spied on her a little, he covered up the reason of his worries by a curiosity it felt less humiliating to him the sparkles he used to love in some blue eyes he hated them now because this time it wasn't out of excitement but tears
'what are you afraid of?'
Sasuke's eyes traveled down with her hands as she used her palm to support her light body and bent on her knees
She was shaking and he was confused all that covered up excuses about curiosity were wiped away
"Oi"
"gomensai"
"Hyuga!"
"GOMENSAI...GOMENS-"
"Oii, what are you apologizing fo-"
"SAI..NEJINISAN"
And then he stopped he wasn't the one meant for all her apology
Is she even aware of his presence?
He doesn't care once her knees were heard on the floor sasuke wasted no time in carrying her to the hospital
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He stood at the hallway of this huge place the smell was the same sicking giving you this tasteless feeling about life everything was white..
And for the first time sasuke appreciated the other colors though he doesn't even like colors
His thoughts took him to that white clothes the hyuga wore to that small garden her mother grew to that story about her escapes to her mom's garden to this
And then life replayed everything in front of him
What did he achieve from this marriage?
Nothing..
Absolutely nothing
He hadn't touched her since their first night together, his goal for rebuilding his clan seemed far from his reach and because of it this hyuga who won't let go of him and neither he would
Too much time was wasted waiting for the right moment but something was pulling him back from it, he didn't want to force her
Sasuke rested his head on the wall behind him before the door slide open
and the nurse came out she walked passed to the other direction his blood boiled he was the one who brought her and very known for the whole village that he was Her husband
sasuke walked behind her his glare on her back made it effect he could her shoulders flinch
"OI!-"
"sasuke-kun"
That gave the poor nurse an excuse to run while he was distracted by the yamanaka
"what brought you here?"
"I could ask you the same thing"
Well that was stupid
Ino worked here despite the confusion on her face and his hidden embarrassment he did took his word back and kept on glaring at her as if waiting for her answer
He wanted this time to pass by fast so he turned back to that lonely room few steps away and opened the door looking to the person laying under the white sheets
Like that died angel in her novel, white flowers would be surrounding her body, many and many people will greet her speaking her good memories she shared with them and she would be cold
Cold as if the floor beneath him shivers ran to his body he didn't if it was the coldness in this room that caused it but he stepped towards her reaching for her cheeks barely touching her
Sasuke was grateful for the wamness that wash away his shivers fixing the bed and sheets over her body his brow furrowed
'if that day came faster what would you do?'
Sasuke doesn't know what his reaction would be
"don't worry, she's fine now"
He thought he got rid of her when he walked away
"but she stressed, hinata-chan must be thinking about something serious, do you know if anything was troubling her?"
"I don't know"
He knows, she knew now but he kept it what if this blonde demon starts blabbering over his head what if she convinced her to join?
'whats would you do?'
"I would be worried if it was someone else who's not you"
He didn't ask about the reason but it was appeared on his face
"Eh, Nani?"
What? He said nothing
"huh? Sasuke you didn't notice? Kawaii ahaha-"
His dark eyes stopped her when he directed them towards her
But then they were drifted to her finger as she pointed at him then at his wife
" you stare a lot, watch her from afar, gets mad whenever some of her teammates met her or get too close, you never showed up to any gathering if she wasn't there and pretty much you don't leave the house if it wasn't something important or only go out with her"
Then she smirked at him, mocking him
"doesn't that lead you to something?"
No
He kept staring at her as if expecting an answer again
"well, I will let you find out yourself"
She waved her goodbye with a giggles
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The last uchiha walked out of that hospital the smell of it stinks, he ignored that Yamanaka's words
but his thoughts was still at that hospital room
It was already dark he didn't watch the sunset
He was carrying the hyuga and jumping in the roofs to the hospital
She would need to eat but what kind of food?
He wasn't good at picking food from the village sasuke got spoiled by her handmade food now that he forgot what kind of food this place serves And this group of young girls screaming wasn't helping
It's dark already what were they screaming for?
___________________________
He appreciated the villagers gratitude or should he call warm feelings for him, he never expected to be surrounded like this whenever he walked out and hard to ignore.
"Neh, come eat with us?"
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
"Let's go to ramen shop"
"Stop bothering Naruto-kun he doesn't want to go with you!"
And there it goes
They fought while he stood in the middle if them
He denied multiple times now he has to go somewhere else
Naruto voiced out a little higher so they would hear him
"Ah gomen, I really need to go somewhere else"
Naruto smiled sheepishly rubbing his head
In attempt to cut his way through all of them his ocean fell on the darkness
And he zoned out
But sasuke furrowed his eyebrows when Naruto knew about his  and turned to another way
In another failed attempt he raised his hand to talk to him but he vanished
______________________
For the first time in his life sasuke was grateful for these insane fangirls or else Naruto would be beside him blabbering now.
He saw him wave his hand but he ignored it
The long way to his home was tiring but it's better since none would follow him
__________________
Sasuke stood in the kitchen staring at those red tomatoes how can he turn it to one of those delicious dishes she always made?
He was no chef!
Sasuke held they knife irritation built inside him at his ignorant about these simple tomatoes
He cut them in different shapes they didn't look as beautifully decorated as the one he see on the plates they were a mess
As he stared at the plate he realised that tomatoes wasn't enough for a dinner he wasn't the only one eating so he walked again looking at the fridge glaring inside looking for a new idea to fill that white plate
He hates white!
Grabbing an egg he walked to the oven preparing the pan, itachi used to make them perfectly he just need to follow his steps
Once the pan was heated he will crack an egg
But how was he supposed to know
Sasuke was known by the name genius too
But not in the kitchen everyone would knew if they saw him touch the small pan by his palm
"AH! Kuso!!...tch"
Sasuke sucked into his palm as he tried to crack the egg with the other
The egg fell perfectly fine on the pan he thought it would break and mess up again and it won't be as good as his brother
Well that wasn't the reason he messed up again
When the egg was cooked and he wasn't sure if it cooked or not but sasuke depend on his guessing and took the pan to the plate to flip the egg
But it didn't move he turned the pan and glared at the egg then he left a spoon to move the egg but ended up mixing the white with the yoke
"Tsk!"
Out of frustration sasuke mixed it again and throw it on the plate
Finally
He stared at the plate again it wasn't as good as he wanted it but at least it was filled now
But then he would have to make another one for himself too
"Che!"
________________________
She hated the smell of these beds
Hinata threw away the sheets from over her body then looked at the ceiling
Desperate
For something she couldn't see or touch
For something unknown for her
'Would you stay like this?'
Hinata jumped from the bed walking out this place.
It was cold outside the wind was cruel on her thin body and clothes she didn't have anything to warm herself
Because it seemed that whoever brought her here didn't bring her coat too
Hinata furrowed her eyebrows glaring at the road in front of her
She knew who brought her here and that same person couldn't even bring her something to warm herself? He couldn't even stay?
"Hinata-chan"
Her foot stopped and she thought this night couldn't be worse
____________________
The plate came out better than hers, his second attempt looked better than the one before
Sasuke seat both plates next to each other and to judge his work
Then he made his choice he will switch plates she will take his and he will take hers
Now all he need is wait for her and Yamanaka to come
But what if that Yamanaka decided to stay too
Sasuke shrugged she can make her own he wasn't making another one for that blonde
He hates her!
The door of their house was heard opened gently and sasuke couldn't help the smile that almost showed it face on his lips he walked out the kitchen
The excitement he felt took him back to when his brother came home
But this time his steps were slower
A question flashed with his steps
'Is this how she felt whenever she sees me?'
The heat that creeped to his cheeks gave him shivers
He stood there waiting for his wife to take her shoes off but she looked behind her to the opened door And another person joined
Another blonde who wasn't Yamanaka
The grin on his face showed the uncomfortable situation they were all in
Hinata was the only one who was unclear about the tension and Sasuke envied her for that but another part of him was pulling at him,
guilt he felt like he was humiliating her
His eyes never left her figures as she walked around
"I didn't know hinata-chan was at the hospital today"
And then his laughter filled this quiet place it sounded as if this household would break in two half by only the noise of Naruto's laughters but his blabbering never stop as he stalked hinata escaping those dark eyes that fell on him
Both stopped as they stared at the table that served two plates the confusion on hinata's face when she looked up to her husband explained everything to Naruto
Yet Naruto walk to the table staring at the dishes that were prepared
He stared at the food it didn't look as fancy as hers
"Didn't know you can cook"
It came out before he could stop it, before he think of it he could see how Sasuke flinched
His tiptoes tightened then released
It's like if he was standing over an egg shell
Damn you Naruto and that moment he started all of this, it's complicated
Sasuke looked to hinata, she was confused
His glare met Naruto's surprised eyes
"Ahahahah apparently he can't"
He pushed the plate back maybe a little too hard he couldn't cover it despite his attempts
Hinata turned to their room taking her hair out of her shirt and after she disappeared
Sasuke turned to Naruto who was now at the door wearing his shoes
Walking behind he caught his arm outside his house turning Naruto around
"Oi!"
He met an icy stare from Naruto who was knowing what had happened and what would
"We agreed on something didn't we?"
Sasuke hissed on Naruto's face but Naruto was unaffected by him
"When?"
They hadn't but sasuke made it clear for Naruto about his intention
"Don't play dump!"
The bright one stared in the darkness of Sasuke's eyes not even the stars could lighten them up
He was the representative of darkness something that gives you chill and thrilled at the same time
Something that every sense in him tells him to stay away from this darkness yet he would step inside it
Unexpected and dangerous
That how Sasuke was
How did Sasuke see him?
"I'm hinata's friend too"
That a question he wanted to know the answer of
"I told you to not play dump"
But he will never find out the answer of it
"Then what else would i be here for?"
It was simple really
Why were they taking this seriously, wouldn't be weirder if Naruto stopped visiting sasuke?
"Stop your nonsense, I won't repeat myself again do you hear me?"
Sasuke threw Naruto's arm but
Naruto defended himself
"Hinata-chan invited me" Naruto spoke after a minute of silence
But That didn't make any sense to sasuke
Why?
"I asked her to join me at the ramen shop but she refused saying that she preferred homemade food and then she invited me"
Despite all the flames in Naruto's blue eyes he didn't miss the crack in his voice
"It's manner Sasuke, something you don't have"
Then he turned leaving the uchiha to watch his back
That orange shirt was starting to get old
Did he make a mistake?
This was the first time Naruto walk away first, speak like that to him
Sasuke began losing everyone around him
Why?
His eyes looked back to his house and he walked inside it with heavy steps his legs were frozen yet he managed to move he expected her to take a long time to prepare herself but She was already on her seat waiting for him
'Manners'
'You're losing everyone around you'
Sakura told him that too
If that so then why is she still here?
Was she even someone close?
What was she to him?
What was he to her?
He sat on the opposite of the table looking at her as she took a bit of whatever he made watching closely leaving his chopsticks hanging in the air

'Did she like it?'

He waited for her features to change maybe furrowed or stare at him with a surprised face, she is chewing too slow maybe she didn't like it but how was it supposed to taste like? It's just an egg

Sasuke narrowed his eyes when she swallowed finally it's time finally to judge his skills

But nothing came from her side

She didn't make any difference in her reaction nothing changed she just took another one and chewed slowly then swallowed and then do the same thing again and again..

He was a little disappointed he expected her to puke glaring at him with her sweet eyes
that would be better than this, he beginning to hate the life they had together why were they even living together? Why does she has his last name if nothing is happening between them they were a cast in a movie sasuke created but behind this mysterious couple who everyone in this village were curious about their life was an absolute nothingness was this what he was asking for?
How does she feel about all of this?

"tomorrow"

He started an attempt he wish that wouldn't fail

"I'm going to a mission it will take long"

He made a progress sasuke was proud when she stopped eating looking at him with wide eyes, it heated his cheeks to see her looking at him so he avoided these eyes that seemed to be reading his secrets, secrets he doesn't know about it himself, sasuke looked down at his food playing with it before speaking again

"I won't be here for a week"

"eh?"

He almost missed that if he wasn't used to the silence but his ears caught her voice and it made him look up

And she was smiling

sasuke stopped his hand from lifting his food to his mouth looking at her
'you didn't notice?'
Didn't she notice?
Does she even know about herself? About him? Sasuke it felt as if he came back alive his body became warm something inside him was released it felt like that thing was kept in a cage for a long time and he let out a long breath, was it this good? But it's bad too..
Oh No, damn that yamanaka and her long hair and talkative mouth, damn her for opening his eye to something he didn't know about, but how did this happen? This wasn't his intension how did she manage to pull him to this he was uchiha sasuke incapable to have these things this one went too deep for his taste it pulling to a place where he doesn't belong but he couldn't fight it
He walked there blindly covering everything by excuses and now he fell in a place in all his years in life he never thought he would be there, was she happy now? Sasuke tightened his grip on the chopsticks he made a mistake a huge one too.
How was he supposed to be out now?
He won't be able to leave by himself, especially when she was in front of his eyes and she's looking at him with these pearls
Stop!
He wanted to say it loud to defend himself from whatever spells she throw at him
Was it because he didn't see anyone else? He soent all his days alone or with her but they barely communicate
Sasuke looked up again it's still there inside him, alive breathing became different
So again he blamed the Yamanaka
He couldn't find the way to curse her along with Ino, he stared long at her eyes
Why?
He wanted to ask her directly, why did he trapped himself? Why did he walk on this path?
But what would be the difference? How would he avoid it?
"hyuga"
Ahh, is that why he couldn't say her name it gives him a lot of pressure to call her by her first name despite how light her name sound it throws this weight on his chest and he covered that by an excuse that it sounded too cute for his taste yet he called sakura by hers many times why did he denied when it was the right time?
Because he didn't want to seem weak to himself, was that another excuse to blind his eyes from something he might regret in the future?
Things began to get clear to sasuke and he didn't like it
Kuso!
Sasuke forgot he had called her he blinked when his wife raised her eyebrows
"nothing, che"
He slammed his chopsticks on the table and walked away, away from this demon that wore a angel smile
Tonight he will sleep on the couch
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Just in the right time right?
God loves her today or maybe god wanted to meet her soon whatever it was she was happy, tomorrow she will be there proving to herself that she was one of them too, that she was useful not only the Hyūga's princess, once her husband step out of her sight she will began her plan too.

Note: I'm sorry if there are any mistakes