close your eyes and feel me

25

It's 11pm and i said i would post a new chapter on Friday, which is today.... this is not the greatest one and it's really short, but it's a bridge in the story i feel necessary so we can continue. Although short and uneventful, I still hope you can like it :) I'm going to work on the next chapter, and I promise it will be (1) longer and (2) eventful ;) and also, you wont get it after 7 months of waiting.... I'll try my best to get back into writing :)

Anyways, hope you like it :)
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Facing the ocean with nothing more on the horizon than a small dot, one that the Captain had assured her was the island of Antigua, Charlotte was standing alone on the deck, taking in the salty air as she felt the anxiety of the past months finally leaving her body. She kept her eyes on the dot in front of her, knowing that each minute passing, each wave against the boat meant she was getting closer to him, to Sidney.

The captain assured her they would be at the port by the end of the day tomorrow. Ever since hearing the news, Charlotte was feeling reassured, but mostly calm, very calm. She had no idea where to go or what to do once on the island, and for all that she knew, Sidney might as well already be dead, taken by illness. However, although she couldn't keep these thoughts in her head, deep down in her heart, she knew everything would be ok.

Specifically, it was thinking about Sidney that gave her the strength to remain this calm. He would not and had not, left her thoughts ever since she had left London. He was in her dreams, and if she closed her eyes, she could almost feel him, standing next to her on the deck.

She thought of their first dance together, at a time where they barely knew each other. Back then, she was so new to all of this, so naive. She remembers being starstruck by the scene, him leading the dance so professionally, like a gentleman, the beautiful dress she was wearing, and overall the beauty of the night. The second time they danced together was even better. Even here, on the boat, she could see herself giving him a hand and being led on the dance floor, her beautiful golden dress making her look like a princess.

At night, she would think of his hands, touching her sometimes gently, sometimes more roughly. She knew now what it felt to be kissed, to be touched by him. To think of the tension and clumsiness between them in the beginning, sometimes she couldn't believe he had touched her in the most intimate places of her body. That he had whispered in her ears, making her skin boil and her body shake from excitement.

When she met him first, she was confused about the way he would look to her and doubted every touch, but now she was craving for more. More of his hands. More of his lips. More of him, whole.

She loved everything about him that made him who he was. She loved the bitterness, the scary, the worried Sidney. She loved him when they argued, when he confessed his feelings, when he stoically stood there, pretending not to care. Charlotte loved him at every moment, even when he pissed her off, even when they screamed at each other.

She loved him when he wrote inappropriate letters to her.

She loved him, she loved him, she loved him.

She loved him so much that she knew he was alive. To have her whole body and soul loving a man, she would know if something was wrong. Surely, if he had died, so would have she.

-     "Sorry, Miss." the captain's voice takes her back to reality as he walks towards her, "You might want to go back to your chambers. My teams are about to get to work out there."

-     Charlotte gave one last look to the dot, to the island, to Sidney, and turned around. "Of course," she tells the captain.

   

Back in her room, she settles on her bed, knowing that by tomorrow, this whole madness will be over and they reunited.

Of course, what Charlotte had not prepared herself was the night that was coming.

The water in her face as well as the loud, incoherent shouts coming from outside woke Charlotte up. Quickly, the terrible smell coming from Georgianna, squatting in the corner, a bucket in her hands, dissolved any confusion that might have been in her mind.

-     « God's Heaven, but what on earth is happening? » she asked, a hand already on her mouth and nose.

Between two burp - that Charlotte will gracefully forget ever happened- her friend weakly says « The sea's... the waves... » But Georgianna does not need to finish her sentence for Charlotte to understand.

The room is moving, or at least, it looks like it. Drops of saline water keep splashing onto her face, so Charlotte quickly makes it her priority of closing the porthole to make it stop. If they were to smell like vomit tonight, they would do so while staying dry.

She herself starts to feel nauseous as she walks to the door. With great strength, she opens it and just peeks outside, where she can hear the seamen screaming and shouting. This is no time for her to adventure herself outside her quarters unless she wants to risk being ejected into the ocean.

-     « How long has this been going on? » she asks as she closes the door, turning to her friend, both her hands on the wall as to make sure not to fall onto the ground. « Is the room spinning? » she wonders out loud.

-    « It sure feels like it. »

Nausea, coming from both the constant moving of the room and the smell, is getting stronger. Before she passes away - or end up vomiting herself- she slowly lets herself fall into the ground.

-    « I cannot get used to this. » Charlotte complains. « We've been at sea for weeks. »

Georgianna looks up, drools on her chin, watery eyes. Nobody is elegant in sickness. Between two sharp breath, she finally says :

-    « The captain came about ten minutes again... We should arrive in a couple of hours at least. »

Letting a growl of frustration out, Charlotte crawled on the floor to her friend. Hands on her back, she gently brushes her, comforting Georgianna. Both of them had had their fair share of seasickness moments during this trip, and it was quite embarrassing for the both of them to be in this vulnerable condition.

The two women finally lean back against the wall, right next to each other. Georgianna's head resting on Charlotte's shoulder. With closed eyes, they try to find a way of being rocked by the waves, to move as the ocean does.

Soon, this will be over, she keeps repeating to herself. Soon.