The Clarity of Love (Montereal Series #2)

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Sa dami ng mga dapat kong gawin, hindi ko pa din makalimutan ang sinabi saakin ni Ryder. Actually, hindi niya naman talaga 'yon saakin sinabi eh. Kay Clark niya mismo yun sinabi pero hanggang ngayon ay bitbit ko pa rin.

"Angela, what's the meaning of that? I mean when two guys talking about a girl and then one of them said, 'I'll make her mine, again' like that?" Nasa backstage kami ng isang talk show kung saan ako yung guest.

"Huh? Anong ibig mong sabihin?" I scrunched my nose when she didn't get what I meant.

"When a guy said 'I'll make her mine' what does he mean? Is he's just joking or what?" I asked again but this time I make sure na maiintindihan niya na yun.

"Kapag kasi lalaki ang nagsalita or kapag mga lalaki na ang naguusap, asahan mo na seryoso sila sa mga sinasabi nila. All of the words came out from their mouth are true and sincere. That means, seryoso talaga siya doon sa babaeng kinukwento niya. Why you're asking out of nowhere? Did you heard Clark said that?" Mabilis akong napailing ng magtanong siya. Tinignan niya naman ako ng may halong pangaasar kaya iling na lang ako ng iling.

"No, hindi si Clark yun. A friemd of mine. Natanong ko lang naman." Parang hindi pa siya na-satisfy sa sinabi ko.

"Miss Clarisse, be ready!" Pagaanunsiyo ng direktor at tinignan pa ako kaya nagmadaling lumapit saakin ang mga staff at inayusan ulit ako.

I stood up so that it'll be easy for me when the host will call my name. I'm nervous right now because this is a talk show and I'm sure the host will ask something na below the belt o kaya naman about my past. Kabisado ko na mga galawan ng mga host sa isang talk show. Kaya mas lalo akong kinakabahan. This is my first time na mag guest sa isang talk show.

"Let's all welcome, Miss Clarisse Raegan!" I heard the host mentioned my name. Now, it's my turn para magpakita na sa kanila. Umalis na ako ng back stage at pumunta kung nasaan ang host. May mga nagpalakpakan nung lumabas ako kaya todo nfiti ako ngayon. But my inner me is really nervous as f*ck.

You can do it, Clara. Don't be nervous. It's just a talk show duhh. Kinakausap ko na ang sarili ko gamit ang isip ko. Pinapakalma ko na rin ang sarili ko. Finally, nakaupo na rin ako sa tapat ng host. She just gave me a smile and so I smiled back at her.

Nagstart na siyang magtanong. The show went so smooth kaya mas lalo akong kinakabahan. Nung una tinanong niya lang ako about sa journey ko sa pagiging model and vlogger ko.

"Wow! Model na, vlogger pa at artista pa! That's Clarisse!" Nagpalakpakan na nan ang mga nanonood saamin.

"So when did you decide na gusto mo na palang pasukin ang pagaartista? I can say that you're so flexible. Parang lahat ay kaya mo namang gawin." Pinagpatuloy niya lang ang pagtatanong saakin.

"I don't know when. Bigla na lang nag pop up sa isip ko na maybe I'll try na pumasok sa industry na ito, because why not? And I didn't expect na magiging maganda ang pagsisimula ko." I'm talking right now as if I'm talking with my bestfriend. Unti-unti naman na akong naging komportable at na-relax na rin ako.

The talk show was fun naman. I really enjoyed talking about my journey as model, vlogger and an artist. It's fun not until she showed me  picture of mine and Ryder. My mouth formed an 'o'. Awkward kong pinagmasdan ang reaksyon ng mga audiences.

"What's your relationship with Ryder?" She asked. Nagalinlangan akong ngumiti sa kaniya. Why do I have to answer this kind of question? Sumenyas yung ibang mga staff na i-change daw ang question kaso itong si Miss Sei eh ayaw niyang palitan. Dalawang beses niya yatang naitanong iyan saakin.

"So someone did a background research, and he found out that Ryder is your ex. Is that true? You know Clarisse, I don't want to believe in him. Gusto namin or gusto ko na sayo mismo manggaling ang bagay na iyon. But you don't need to answer my question if you don't want to. I respect that."