𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙒𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝘾𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙞𝙚 𝘾𝙧𝙪𝙢𝙗𝙡𝙚𝙨

Chapter 13

Your POV

     As soon as the elevator doors
opened, I was sprinting out, following Friday's directions until I came to a dead stop in front of the room that Friday said Bucky was in. I took a deep breath, even taking the time to pull Bucky's sweater up higher on my neck so that it would cover the dark bruises that were starting to form.

     I pushed the door open slowly, being met with a sight that made tears well up in my eyes. Bucky was sitting straight up in the hospital bed, his wrists buckled down onto the bed, along with a large strap over his shoulders, and judging by the outline of his legs through the thin hospital blanket, his ankles were bound as well. His eyes were closed and I could see the rapid movement of his eyes underneath his eyelids.

    I didn't say a word as I silently made my way over to the rickety chair beside his bed. The chair squeaked and gave me away. His head snapped towards me, and his eyes were swirling with emotions, guilt and sadness being the strongest of all of them.

"Y/n." He spoke with a gravely voice, he probably hadn't spoken since I last saw him.

"Hey, honey." Tears were streaming down my face now, and I reached for where his wrists were buckled to the bed, but he stopped me.

"I don't want to hurt you again. I can't live with myself knowing I did it once already." His voice was so broken, and when I met his eyes, he was staring at the purple bruises on my neck.

"I trust you, James." I stared into his eyes, forcing him to meet my gaze.

"See where trust got you the first time." He jerked his head away from my grasp and my face hardened.

"James Buchanan Barnes. I haven't loved you for this long just for you to decided that you don't want it anymore. I do trust you and we will go home soon." I preached to him and forced him to look into my eyes, leaving no room for escape.

"Well I don't need your love anymore. Go home, Y/n." He spit my name out like it was poison on his tongue.

     I was heartbroken at his response, and I swallowed thickly, trying to choose my next words carefully.

"But Grant and I still need yours." My voice was barley a whisper as I curled up onto my chair, looking away from him.

     I felt compelled to leave, but I knew that I would never forgive myself if I did.

"I love you, and that's never gonna change. I swear on the good book." My voice cracked as I confessed to him, trying to get him to stay.

     I didn't force him to respond to me, and instead of waiting for a response, I wiped my tears and steeled myself to leave. I reached the doorway and paused, hoping that I'd get that moment that happens in all the movies where the other confesses and we all go home happy again, but it never came.

     I walked slowly down the corridor, almost tiptoeing so that I could hear him if he changed his mind. As I reached the elevator, I couldn't muster enough strength to even step onto it. I slid down the wall and finally gave in to the immense weight of grief that had practically been thrown on my shoulders all at once.

    I didn't have the heart to make a noise, so I muffled the violent sobs that wracked through my body with my hand, and even some larger and more aggressive ones with the sleeves of the sweater. I didn't know how long I'd been there, but after a while, I felt a pair of arms encircle me. I looked up quickly, hoping that it would be Bucky. But it wasn't. It was Steve.

      He silently walked me to the elevator, taking us back up to the common room of the tower where everyone was anxiously waiting.

"Grant....c-can't see me l-like this." I stuttered as I tried to breathe in as much oxygen as my lungs would allow, but I still felt like someone was standing on my throat.