My Saving Grace

Just Dancing

John and I finally made it to Starbucks and sat down at a table. It's been a damn long time since we've had a conversation.. like an actual, serious, one on one conversation. It's a little awkward for both of us considering the events that just took place plus the fact that we really don't even know where to begin. We kept catching each other looking the other over and would smile awkwardly before looking away. This continued for about 5 minutes before John finally decided to talk.

"So Katy, what's been up with you lately?" He smiled, leaning back in his chair to get a good look at me. I nervously swallowed noticing how his gaze was now focused completely on me.

I looked down shyly and stared at my hands in my lap. "um well not much of anything to be honest.. what about you? I'm more interested in you!" I said throwing the main focus onto him. I for one did not feel like getting into my crazy life, but I was always interested in his.

"Do you want the honest, straight forward answer that I know you're not going to like?" He asked placing his forearms on the table and leaning towards me. My hands began to sweat as I kept them firmly placed around my coffee cup. What could he possibly have to say that I wouldn't like?

"Sure.." I nodded.

"I've been thinking about you every day since you rejected me." He said softly looking into my eyes.. almost smirking in a cute little way. He was damn adorable and he knew it.

"John i'm with Mi-"

"Michael. I know." He sighed running his hand through his hair. "I'm trying to accept that really I am but no matter what I want us to be friends."

"Me too." I said and we fell back into an awkward silence. This was not going the way I expected it to. I didn't think we would be so nervous and careful around each other. I also didn't know that he would be so blunt with his feelings towards me when he knew I was in a relationship. He began to tap his fingers against the table and I could tell he was debating whether to tell me something or keep it to himself.

"Look Katy.. how long have you been with him?" I was a little taken back by the seriousness in his voice. I lifted my head to see an even more serious expression on his face.

"Why?"

"I just, I've only met him twice and I don't like how we treats you. even if he says he's joking."

I was stumped. I had no idea how to respond to that. I sat there dumbfounded by his question as he stared at me waiting for me to speak.

"Does it matter what you think?" Was all I said and took a drink of my coffee. I heard him sigh and decided to ignore it. If he came here to try and ruin my relationship with Michael then I wasn't going to waste another moment here.

"No.. it doesn't. Look, how about we go out tonight? Just as friends of course." He suggested almost begging me to say yes. I should have said no but I wanted to go out and have some fun for once.

Before I let my mind take over my heart I agreed. "Yeah, sure."

A few hours passed by and it was getting late. I called Michael and made up some excuse as to why I would be home late hoping he wouldn't question me which he surprisingly didn't.

We made it into a club and he walked me over to a group of people and introduced me to his friends. After talking to them for a few minutes I started to feel uncomfortable. Knowing that I was betraying Michael by lying to him and coming here was John was eating me alive. What if he found out? He would be heartbroken or even more so mad. I think John noticed my discomfort and excused us from the loud conversation and led me over to a quieter part in the corner. We sat on one of the couches and he lifted my chin to look up at him.