PLAYLIST. nct dream

098

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           jieun can feel how her chest swell in too much guilt, how her heart drown in loneliness and how everything around her feel so foreign.

graduation passed by in a blink and now she find herself getting busy once again. while she's preparing for law school, chenle, lina and jisung is preparing for different job application as well.

although it wouldn't be hard for them since they are literally heir to different big companies.

now that she think about it, it somehow feel new not having jisung beside.

for fifteen years, everyday, without fail, jisung have always been by her side. even when he reach high school, he make sure to always find time for her and even when he started going to college, he make sure to make time for her despite his busy schedule.

but when she got her sight back couple of years ago, jieun doesn't understand why jisung is still sticking around her.

for fifteen years, it just feel so weird not having jisung beside her.

but jieun, isn't this what she's actually wishing for?

one way or another, she knows she can't always keep jisung beside her. not everyday jisung would always come running to her aid. that's why, for the past few months she'd been trying her hardest to atleast, put some distance between her and jisung.

but jisung park is a hard nut to crack. heck, he even got angry when jieun slowly distance herself from him.

and that's the reason why he's standing in front of her in his full glory.

"jieun mag-usap nga tayo," he uttered, his annoyance seeping through his words.

she didn't even make any effort to argue. maybe telling him head on and being completely honest with him is the right thing to do. her guilt is eating her anyway, this is the least she could do. to offer an explanation.

cause playing it nice and being lowkey is certainly isn't helping.

"jieun, may problema ba?" jisung started calmly, but deep down, jieun know he's about to blow up.

it's not like she's doing it on purpose — or maybe she actually does, you know what. she actually does, but she's doing it for a reason.

jisung keep pestering her about helping her in preparation for law school. helping her with her papers and enrollment when he's suppose to be preparing for his job interview instead.

they are both adults now with different priorities, jieun simply don't want to burden him than she already did for the last fifteen years.

"wala," she lie through her teeth and jisung immediately scoff upon hearing her response.

"don't lie eun," he said. "akala mo di'ko napapansin mga ginagawa mo. I know you've been trying to distance yourself from me jieun..." he uttered, "just please, tell me why,.." he trailed off.

jisung can see it. he's not blind nor stupid not to notice jieun's action for the past months.

how she's refusing all the help he's trying to give her and how she's trying to do everything by herself.