Wishing I Could Save Myself from a Life I Despise: My Shadowed Life Series

Chapter 20: Couldn't Resist My Charm

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Chapter 20: Couldn’t Resist My Charm

I hesitantly walked the halls in search of Maxim. I knew he had the answers I sought after and I knew I could get him to reveal them to me. I passed by the foyer and noticed what had caused the crashing sounds earlier. Pictures were torn from the walls and the entryway table was over turned. A once lovely vase rested in a hundred little jagged pieces on the floor.

I stared at the broken porcelain and scooped up a few pieces, shoving them in my pocket. Maybe they could be useful later, when I went back home to Chester and him. I felt awful even thinking it, and even worse that Max had reacted this way to what I’d said to him. I didn’t mean it. It wasn’t his fault. I had been beaten, raped and sent to the hospital plenty of times before and would have had the same outcome, even without his notes, sooner or later.

After countless minutes of a fruitless search inside the nearly empty home, I wandered outside. I wanted to get a closer look at the garden and to be honest, I was drawn to it. When I rounded the corner I noticed a figure leaning back on the bench opposite the tiger lilies. He was shaded by a tall tree and he rested his head back on his hands, his eyes were closed.

I settled next to him quietly, not saying a word. I watched him, studied his face. He was handsome and rugged looking. His soft lips called me to them, but I resisted. The painful, worried appearance of his face had me concerned. This wasn’t his fault and he needed to understand that. I didn’t comprehend all of his reasons for ‘stalking’ me, but I forgive it.

I sat there quietly, keeping my breathing even and pondering where I would start, what I would say first. This wasn’t going to be easy, but nothing in my life ever was. I thought about this a few moments more, before I was interrupted by his alluring voice.

“I know you’re there cheri. So why don’t you say what you’ve come to say, then leave me be?” Max stated calmly without moving a muscle. His head was still rested on his hands and he hadn’t opened his eyes either. Was he that upset with me that he couldn’t look at me, or was it that he was still displeased with himself?

“Max, I want to talk to you, will you please look at me.” It was more of a demand than a request and it was bold at that. In the past few weeks to a month, I had gotten braver in expressing myself and my feelings. This was all due to Max and Gabe, but mostly Max. He made me comfortable and I felt like I could open up to him and could be honest without repercussions.

“Why, so I can see the disappointment and pain in your eyes when you look at me? I don’t think so.” He replied weakly and shifted away from me. I wasn’t going to stand for this. He had no need to feel sorry for himself or loathe himself because of me. Is this the effect I had on decent people? Because Chester and my father surely never felt bad about one damn thing they had done to me.

“Maxim, if you don’t open your damn eyes and look at me, then I’m leaving… I’m going home.” I announced in a threatening manner. I knew he would never let that happen, therefore he had no choice but to look at me and talk to me. For once in my life, I had the upper hand and it was empowering.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Max opened his eyes and stared at me. He sighed deeply, and turned to face me. His face was sad, his brows were furrowed and a small frown graced his lips. He really didn’t want me to leave, and that made me feel something I hadn’t felt in a long time. I felt wanted, maybe even loved and that sparked a small sense of happiness in me.

“I’m sorry that I lied to you. I should have told you sooner that I had been following you, watching you. I never meant to scare you or hurt you.” He replied thoughtfully. His voice was sincere and it pulled at my heart. I was shocked when I first learned that he was my stalker, but I wasn’t angry with him, not after I talked to Gabe about it.