Wishing I Could Save Myself from a Life I Despise: My Shadowed Life Series

Chapter 10: Tristan

Chap 10... It's all Tristan :)

Comment & Vote!

*********************************************************************************************************************

Chapter 10: Tristan

I lay in my bed crying my eyes out. I had showered and nearly scrubbed the skin off of every part of my body. Well, every part that he touched. I was filthy and disgusting. I couldn’t believe he would have done such a thing to his own daughter, and on her 16th birthday.

I was saving myself for someone I loved, someone special. I had turned Chester down several times already. I felt that 15 was too young to have sex. He seemed okay with it at first, but had pressured me ever since my mom died two months ago. Well, when my mom was murdered and it was entirely my fault.

Chester was always the perfect boyfriend before my mom passed, but afterward, he had changed. I didn’t like to think of how he was sometimes rough, even forceful with me. He was always jealous and untrusting. It reminded me of Carl, my father. I needed to get away from him, I wanted to. But he was suddenly best pals with Carl. They seemed to have an understanding of some sort where I was concerned.

Chester never questioned Carl about me and the things that happened between us. And Carl never questioned Chester when I showed up with new bruises or cuts.

So there I lay, wondering what had kept Tristan so long that he wasn’t here to protect me. I couldn’t blame him though. He had no more idea of what Carl was capable of than I had. I really thought he was a better man than that but I guess I was wrong. I was glad Tris wasn’t here in a way, because I knew I could never tell him the truth.

My brother would have killed him for what he did to me, or Carl would have killed Tristan if I confessed, like he threatened. Then I would have no brother, or we would have no parents and go to foster care. There was no way we could have stayed together and I just couldn’t live without Tristan.  He was my twin, he was my other half.

When I heard the door open, I prayed it wasn’t him again. Please God, don’t do this to me, not again. I felt the bed depress under the weight of a body and warm arms wrapped around me. I felt comfort and safety. I knew then that it was my bother and not the bastard that raped me and took my virginity on my 16th birthday. He snuggled next to me and all I could do was cry. I turned to him, gripping him forcefully like my life depended on it.

He didn’t ask questions, that was our thing. We just comforted each other until each of us was ready to talk. I fell asleep in his arms, feeling safer than I had in the two months since my mother died. Somehow, I knew that Tris felt the same way.

In the morning, things were clear. I was resigned to keep my secret from Tristan, but if it happened again, I would tell him and we would run away together. That was my plan. I hated to lie, or even think of lying to him, but it had to be done. I needed time to make preparations. So I would buy that time with lies.

I looked over at Tris and he slept peacefully. His golden brown hair was short and disheveled from a restless night of non-sleep. My guess was that he stayed awake, just holding and comforting me as he often did, only falling asleep after many wakeful hours.

When he stirred and opened his deep green eyes, eyes that matched mine, I saw the questioning look that was planted there. He was going to ask and I was going to lie to him.

“Morning Trini, are you okay? What happened?” He asked with a soothing voice and used my nick-name. He was the one who named me ‘Trini’. I loved the way he said it, it made me feel safe and secure. He patiently awaited my answer. What would I say to him? How could I lie to the only person in my life that I loved and lived for? I had no choice. His life was worth more than the truth.