Wishing I Could Save Myself from a Life I Despise: My Shadowed Life Series

Chapter 17: A Great Mental Image

ENJOY... Crissy =:P

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Chapter 17: A Great Mental Image

When I awoke I was alone. A strange feeling of loss overwhelmed me. What caused it eluded me, as I searched my mind for an answer to the mystery of my feelings. I sat there silently for what seemed like hours, before attempting to get up and into the shower. It was morning, the sunlight drifted through the curtains and into the room that was too luxurious for the likes of someone like me.

I was a no one, a dirty, worthless, useless no one who didn’t deserve the attention and concern I had gotten in the past few weeks, not to mention years, since I had met Gabe and his mysterious brother Maxim.

So much about them was still uncertain. They were hiding something from me and if the angels weren’t a figment of my imagination, but really them, then they had a lot of explaining to do. Why did they know so much and why did they even care? What the hell was really going on around here and why did I feel so drawn to Maxim. I knew they had the answers, I felt it in my gut. But why did they refuse to come clean about it?

It wasn’t that I faulted them for their secrecy, of course I had secrets of my own to keep hidden, but I was annoyed that even the simplest of questions went without a resolution. Perhaps this was how they felt as well. Maybe it was time I admitted a few things myself, only I didn’t have the strength to think about it, let alone talk about that day, the worst day of my life.

I struggled against my aching body, as pain ripped through me and my head pounded. My weak muscles tried to push my battered and bruised body out of bed, but my attempts were futile. I slumped back onto the bed, much agony filled me as I landed on the soft mattress. Just as I sighed in defeat a light thumping sounded on my door. A few seconds later, a head popped in and scanned over me.

“Are you feeling okay cheri? Do you need anything?” His calming voice asked as his deep blue and silver eyes pierced into mine, as though he was reading my soul. It sent a warm, welcomed feeling coursing through me.

“Well, I wanted to take a shower, but for one, I can’t sit let alone stand and I’m still bandaged like a mummy.” I sighed in defeat. I was truly helpless at this point in time and I didn’t like that feeling. It was a sentiment I had lived with for the last 5 years which grew stronger every day. I shook the images out of my head quickly before deep depression overtook me once again.

“I realize that you were in a coma, but I’m certain that you at least got a sponge bath or two while you were at the hospital. That has to help your mood a bit, right?” Max announced after closing the door and approaching me cautiously.

“That’s comforting. A stranger’s hands all over my unconscious body paints a great mental image.” I muttered. Then I remembered last night, and the way his hands felt as they skimmed my naked skin. That was a great mental image, one I was embarrassed to relive. I didn’t understand the feelings he made me feel, I had never felt anything like them before.

“Well cheri, I could carry you to the bathroom if you like. Maybe help with the dressings again?” He responded thoughtfully as he laid a hand on my arm gently, not realizing his own actions until my eyes landed on his hand. He quickly pulled away, a slight flush covering his face. I really needed to get to the bottom of whatever this was between us, now was just not the time.

“Okay.” I responded without thinking and before I knew what was happening, I was in his arms and he carried me into the bathroom and set me gently on the closed toilet seat.

“Bath or shower?” He inquired while fiddling with the faucet to get the right temperature.

“Um… bath I guess. A long soak would do my aching body some good. It’s been a while since I was allowed to have a proper bath, since the last time I was here I mean.” I replied almost automatically. I didn’t like how I was still so candid with him.