Girl Meets Boy

Chapter 47 - The Last Goodbye

I had been here for three hours and nothing had changed. The walls were still white, Hayes was still locked in his own guilt and grief, the coffee was still bland, the nurses still rushed in and out of various rooms and Daisy was still going to die.

I hadn't cried when Ally told me. I just sat and stared at nothing. Nothing held my interest and the world had been drained of colour, leaving only faint shades of grey.

I was reminiscing on fond memories of my younger years; running around with two tiny blonde pigtails, up to my knees in mud and my brunette bestfriend Daisy running around beside me with messy hair flying around her face, but not a touch of dirt present on her body. I remembered how my mum had been furious with me for getting so messy and how Daisy told my mum it had been her idea when she had in fact been telling me not to do it.

I remembered forgetting my lunch on the first day of primary school and Daisy giving me half of hers even though her mum had given her a special lunch full of her favourite things for luck.

I remembered missing the bus countless times on the way to school and Daisy walking with me through every type of weather; unbearable heat that left us dripping with sweat, persistant rain that soaked through every layer of clothing and would literally fall so heavily that you basically walked through it blind and of course there was the winter season when snow would bombard us and turn us into teeth-chattering bodies that were an unnatural blue colour. However, she never complained. Not once.

It didn't seem right that she could die.

I got up and made my way to her room. Ally watched me but said nothing as I crept into the dimly lit sleeping area. I sat down next the bed, taking her cold fingers in my warm ones. I watched on the monitor how her heart beat slower than what was usual and I felt the tears finally begin to stream down my face.

I couldn't lose her. Not like this. Not so soon. She doesn't deserve this. I don't hate her. All that time that I was angry with her was time wasted that I should've been spending with her. But I had been mad at her for a reason, and I wasn't about to forget that. Dying didn't make you a saint, but I didn't want her to think I hated her when I didn't.

"Hey, what are you crying about?" Came a barely audiable whisper.

"What do you think?" I said with a small smile, turning back to the now awake Daisy.

"Oh, yeah, well I didn't think you'd be bothered about it." She said sadly.

Jeez she was annoying sometimes. "For gods sake Daisy! I was mad at you and I had a right to be! You lied to my face! You were supposed to be my friend! Friends don't do that! But even after that, it doesn't mean I want you dead or that I didn't care about you!"

I was shocked at myself for exploding at her like that, but I couldn't bring myself to apologise either. Everything I had said was true.

"I'm sorry Millie."

"I know, and I'm not gonna say I forgive you becuase I don't yet, but I still love you and I will eventually." I said honestly, squeezing her frail fingers.

"That's all I'd ever ask." She promised, flashing me the smile that I'd loved since the day we'd met.

We stayed talking until long past midnight, laughing about old times and crying about mistakes and things that will never be. Then, just before sunrise, Daisy started to cough blood and a nurse ushered me from the room.

The minutes passed and I paced outside her door.

I felt sick. I knew she wouldn't survive this but it didn't make it any easier.

I collapsed onto the floor and drew my legs up to my chest, burying my face in my hands and then I cried.

Then I cried some more.

Eventually, an elderly nurse came out of the room looking grave, she didn't have to tell me; I already knew she didn't make it. I just nodded at the lady, stood up and curled into the plastic chair, letting my exhaustion envelope me in it's blissful slumber.