River Rose | ✓

12

Abyss
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Virago (n.)
Strong, brave or warlike woman; a woman who demonstrates exemplary and heroic qualities.

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River A. Rose

Sometimes we create a drawer. A drawer deep inside your mind where you store all your fears and bad feelings. I created a dam, a fucking huge dam filled with all the pain I've experienced my whole life.

The thing is, sometimes you can either let it all spill out so you don't get overwhelmed and consumed by it or...you let it consume you and you fall into the abyss. An abyss created in your own mind to protect yourself from all those feelings you repress.

What happens when I feel yourself falling into that deep endless hole? I feel myself slowly succumbing into the waters of that sickening torment of emotions bottled up.

I stare at the phone from where it landed on the floor, I need to pick it up but I'm drowning in fear inside my own mind.

I take my last ounces of courage and pick up the phone again, with a shaky hand and even unsteadier voice I say "What do you want, Xander?" I feel the atmosphere tense as my family realizes who it is.

I put the phone on speaker and set it on the table, everyone's attention fixed on it and glaring as if we could make it disappear by looking at it.

"Is that a way to say hi to your baby daddy? The love of your life? Baby I've missed you so much" he says

"Cut the act. Why are you calling?" I say with venom and hatred spilling from my voice

"That's easy, you. I want you to pay for what you did to me. You almost killed me precious Autumn and you are gonna pay for it" he says with equal hatred.

I stay silent. I don't know what to say, he makes me feel weak. I fight the tears back as I look over at my son, I can never let Xander close to him. Never again am I losing a child to the hands of these people.

"The cat cut your tongue?" He taunts

"I'm just waiting for you to get as annoyed with your voice as I am" I don't know where that came from but good save River. I mentally high five myself. Xander laughs in a way that sends shivers down my spine.

"I hoped to find you as the sweet innocent girl I first fucked. This one's the version I don't like, all fierce and bitchy" he says

"Sorry to be the one to tell you but that River is dead" I say

"What a shame, I guess I'm gonna have to bring her back. You're not good at killing people and making sure they stay dead after all" he says laughing

"See you in hell" I say and hang up immediately walking up to the balcony beside the living room for some air and bringing my hands to my face and up my scalp in frustration.

I feel a hand on my back as I pull on my hair and clench my fists as I lean on the railing. This can't be happening to me. It can't.

"We'll take care of it Rosey, you are not alone. Look at my River, look at me" Noah says from beside me so I lift my head and do as he says as I bite my cheek so I don't cry.

"You are no longer 14, you are no longer alone. You are a strong independent woman, you've raised your child alone and faced too many dangers in this world. Don't let him break you now, we'll take care of it together" he says cupping my cheeks

"But what if he gets to Oakley? What if we can't stop him? If he gets in here when we are asleep? If I fail to kill him again? I'm so damn stupid how could I ha—" I ramble but I'm cut off when warm, soft lips meet mine.