River Rose | ✓

30

No way out
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Ikigai (n.) Japanese word that translates to: a reason for being

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River

I hear myself screaming but it sounds so far away, my ears are pounding with the rapid beat of my heart and my hands and nails are ripping open as I hit and scratch the floor over and over

They're dead
They're dead
They're dead

That's the only thought on my mind as Valenciano tries to get me back on the chair

"It's sad though that I didn't get to fulfill my plan and kill then in their own home, or get Nikolai to watch me kill Oakley or take little Lily with me with the knowledge of what I'll do to her. For him to know he wasn't capable of saving you and he won't be capable of saving them either" he says but I'm dead

I'm dead inside

At least that's what I think dying is like because my chest burns, it burns as if he were stabbing a hot iron through it

I sob and scream and it makes Valenciano so frustrated he keeps hitting me to get my attention but I welcome the pain

I bathe in it because the agony inside of me is too much knowing that they're dead and it's my fucking fault

I have no way out of here. My babies will grow without a mom, without Noah and their uncles. Without their grandpa

They'll never get to feel the warmth of my father's embrace and how deep his love for them goes. They'll never get to see the happy tears in Noah's eyes as they call him their dad or know what's it's like to even have one.

Never will know what it's like to run around with Malik playing pranks on everyone and making the whole family laugh. Uncle Maverick will never get to tuck them in bed at night and tell them the greatest stories they'd never get tired of hearing

I killed them. Oh my God I killed them! I start screaming again and Valenciano grips my jaw shut

"Fucking slut just shut up already!" He yells, his spittle lands all over my face

"You'll either listen to me, shut the fuck up like a good girl or else I'm gonna make a single call and someone will bring me those little spawns of yours" he threatens and I whimper

Not my babies. I can't lose my babies

"Understood?" He asks and I numbly nod

But then I realize, no matter what I do he's gonna kill me anyways. That's not what I care about, what's important is that if I'm dead he's gonna kill Oak and use Lily

I can't let it happen. I won't

He keeps talking about something while scanning the walls for what tool to use next but I don't listen. I block him out so I can focus

The chains...he only chained my hands, not the ankles.

Okay, okay I need to think. What was Noah saying about the weak points the day we installed them? Think, think, think!

Fuck, he was telling Jake that we had to get better reinforcements for the ceiling beams where the chains are nailed into

He said...he said that the screws the workers used were too short, that with the right amount of force they can be yanked off the ceiling and it would be inconvenient for us if we had someone shackled the moment they gave in