Incorrect Quotes

Supernatural Origins

(MHO oneshot coming... soon? Hopefully?)

[Features Mitch x Pat, Mario x Bryan x Xylo, and Michael x Pierre]

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Bryan: If Xylo and I were drowning, who would you save?

Mario: You two can’t swim?

Xylo: It’s a hypothetical question, Mario! who would you save?

Mario: my time and effort.

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Pierre: Michael and I don’t use pet names.

Devin: I see. Hey, what do bees make?

Pierre: Honey?

Micheal: Yes, dear?

Pierre: ...

Devin: Don't ever lie to my face again.

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Pierre: Okay. I get it. You've had a really hard time lately, you're stressed out, seven people died-

Micheal: Twelve, actually.

Pierre: Not the point. Look, they're dead now and really whose fault is that?

Micheal: Yours!

Pierre: That's right: no one's.

~

Colin: So that’s my plan.

Mitch: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.

Colin: No, go ahead, I want to hear it.

Mitch: It fucking sucks.

Colin: That’s not constructive criticism.

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Mitch: This is a mistake.

Pat, enthusiastically: A mistake we're going to laugh about one day!

Mitch: But not today

Pat, still enthusiastic: Oh, no. Today's going to be a mess

~

*Xylo and Bryan sitting in jail together*

Bryan: So who should we call?

Xylo: I’d call Mario, but I feel safer in jail.

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Bryan, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him?

Mario: You did WHAT–

Xylo: William Snakepeare

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Pat: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?

Bryan: I'm a knife.

Xylo and Mario, from across the room: He's the little spoon.

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Pat: Here's some advice-

Mitch: I didn't ask for any.

Pat: Too bad. I'm stuck here with my thoughts and you're the only one who talks to me.

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Pierre: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside.

Micheal: ...

Micheal: Pierre, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...

Pierre: *Sips coffee from bowl*

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Pierre, tending to Micheal's wounds: How would you rate your pain?

Micheal: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

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Mitch: You often use humor to deflect trauma.

Pat: Thank you.

Mitch: I didn't say that was a good thing.

Pat: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny.

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Pat: You fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. It’s a knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon.

Mitch, not looking up from their book: Spear.

Pat: BLOCKED.

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Bryan: I trust Xylo.

Jakey: You think they know what they're doing?

Bryan: I wouldn't go that far.

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Bryan: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?

Xylo: The car takes a screenshot.

Mario: For the last time, get the fuck out.

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Bryan: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.

Mario: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Bryan: Yes!

Xylo: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

~

{Sorry that it’s pretty short, this is mostly just tiredly written filler}