1. Hardly a word

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[authors note: a new story! While writing my other story's I noticed that I always enjoyed writing themes of social anxiety, that's because I struggle quite a lot with it. It's a nice way to explain what it's like for me, but in story form, So I really hope you enjoy! ~OwlBee]

'3 weeks into the school year and Iv hardly said a word to anyone... it's probably too late anyways, everyone has started establishing friend groups... I guess I'll be alone again, it's not all that bad though, I don't mind being alone.'

Walking towards your classroom, you tried to focus on the sound of your shoes hitting the wooden floors, using that focus to drown out the sounds of students around you.

'Am I walking right? I should have focused on something other than my footsteps, I'm definitely walking weirdly...'

One foot after the other you tried adjusting your walking, worried people would take notice and mock you.

'Just walk like you normally do... wait how do I normally walk? theres something wrong with me... if I don't get it together people are gonna-'

Your train of thought was abruptly derailed when you ran into another student, he was a pretty big guy so he didn't fall, the same could not be said for you, who was now on the floor... completely mortified.

"Ah- sorry about that!" The boy started

You looked up, as your eyes met his a wave of fear ran through you.

'He must hate me for running into him like that... I need to apologize.'

You stood up and started to apologize, the words stopping before they could leave your mouth.

"S-s-so-"

Your hands shook as you tried to muster out a simple sorry, it didn't take long for you to give up, staring forward and avoiding any eye contact, you rushed towards your classroom.

'What the hell is my problem?! It's one word... I couldn't manage to say one word?!'

You kept your head down and stared at your desk. Trying to wrap your head around your previous actions. Lost in thought, you hadn't payed much attention when the teacher walked into the room, that is, until she called your name.

"Y/n l/n"

Your head shot up and you looked her in the eyes, a great way to show you're listening with out giving a verbal reply.

"I noticed that you haven't signed up for a club yet, all students are required to join one. Have you decided yet?"

This was something you had thought quite a bit about, eventually Deciding to be a volleyball team manager, in hopes that you wouldn't need to socialize too much for the position. Although, anxiety being what it is, you couldn't bring yourself to say that you had decided on volleyball. instead, you replied with a simple nod.

"Um... alright... can you please tell me what you'd like to join?"

You heard a few stifled laughs from classmates, leaving you drowning in embarrassment.

You tried to open your mouth to speak

'Volleyball... just say volleyball, oh who am I kidding? I couldn't say sorry 10 minutes ago, why would i suddenly be blessed with social skills now?!'

So, rather than saying what you'd like to do, you pulled out a piece of paper and wrote volleyball club on it, then walked up and handed it to the teacher, before sitting back down.

You could practically feel the judgmental gazes of your classmates all around you, but did your best to ignore them.

"Ah volleyball club. Akaashi, you're in the volleyball club right? Could you please bring L/n there after school?"

"Yes ma'am"

'Akaashi, that's the guy who sits next to me... he plays volleyball?'

You shot your glance over to Akashi, who returned it with a smile. Your head quickly snapped back to looking down at your desk.

'Fuck why did I do that? I should have at least smiled back... he must think I'm crazy....'

While you were busy thinking about how many embarrassing things you had done that day, akaashi decided to try talking to you...

'Shes interesting... I don't think Iv met someone like this before.'

You were knocked out of thought when a small note slid onto your desk

Do you have trouble speaking? Iv never heard you talk, even when it would make things much easier on you...

You looked over at akaashi who was now back to looking at the teacher, assuming that eye contact might make you uncomfortable.
You pulled out your notebook and wrote something down, then placed the note onto Akaashis desk.

Yes, I do. I'm not sure why though, I try talking, but the words stop before I can say them.

You noticed a small smile on akaashis face before he started to write another note, he handed you the note, while still looking forward towards the teacher.

If you'd like, I can try helping you talk to people, we're going to be on the same team after all.

You couldn't help but smile at the note, before passing one more to Akaashi.

If it doesn't trouble you... I would really appreciate that.

As happy as you were to have started making a friend, it wouldn't lessen the affects of your anxiety... your hand writing in the notes was more messy than usual, and your hands shook as you passed them... still though, akaashi seemed to be understanding, offering to help, rather than judging you.

End of chapter 1

[authors note: I had a hard time deciding what story I would do next, I got the idea for this story not long before finishing 'fated enemies', I had a lot of other story's that I couldn't decide between but when I had this idea it didn't take long for me to pick it. I know I'll get to all the others eventually but choosing what to do next is surprisingly hard!
I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of 'love in writing' please let me know anything you'd like to see in the story! ~OwlBee]

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