ꜰᴏʀ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴀʟᴏɴᴇ (ᴛᴏᴅᴏᴅᴇᴋᴜ)

suoıʇɐnʇıS

What were we, what were we both thinking?
We were so naive, so naive believing
We were still happy, still happy
How could I ignore my doubts?
I keep on telling myself we had something good
Did we stay together longer than we should?
Were we just playing pretend because we could?
Was it really that good?
I keep on telling myself it's not what it was
Did we just want to believe that this was love?
Was it really worth the trouble that it caused?
Look where we ended up
➪♧︎
♫ꨄJoshua Basset ~ Telling Myself

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Recap:

    "I saw her again Todoroki," I hiccup, "I saw it all again."

    He hushes me and gently presses a tender kiss to my forehead, whispers ever so sweet words of comfort into my ear. I'd normally overthink this act of affection, driving myself fucking crazy trying to sort out it's meaning, but I'm too weak. Too broken apart inside.

    "It should have been me!" I whisper.

    He pulls away this time and forces me to look him dead in the eye. "No. Don't you fucking dare say that, Izuku. Don't you ever wish for death, do you hear me? It creeps up on you fast enough without you even wanting it. You don't fucking understand how precious your life is!"

    I feel tears well up in my eyes again as I stare up at the beautiful man who I owe so much to. Todoroki had become my unintended reason to live, and he doesn't even know. He doesn't know anything. But I do, and I don't know what to make of it. Maybe I'm sick. Maybe it's best he doesn't know.

Recap Over:

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⚠️Trigger Warning⚠️
This chapter includes mention of self harm, abuse, drugs, and mentions of suicide. If you are harming yourself in any way, getting abused, or have thoughts of suicide or overdosing, please seek help or talk to someone and remember that you are not alone even if it may feel impossible

꧁ꨄ❦~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~❦ꨄ꧂

    When Todoroki finishes tucking me into bed again, I stay silent as he leans over me and I'm not entirely sure what's he's doing until I feel his hand brush against my cheek, moving up to brush my hair out of my face and after a pause, I feel his lips against my forehead. Unlike before, my heart races and I want more than anything to reach up and press my lips to his. But, I can't. I'd just surprise him or freak him out and embarrass him. This is probably his way of caring for me. Todoroki seems like the touchy-feely-lovey sort. Maybe he's like this with everyone he cares about.

My feeling of happiness and excitement soon turns to panic when I feel him move away and his weight lifts off the bed. I don't think twice and reach out as fast as I can, wrapping my hand around his wrist and stop him from taking another step. He whips around and I can tell he sees how afraid and pathetic I look. Face tear stained, hair messy and slightly curled.

"T-Todoroki?" I stutter.

"Yeah?" He asks, coming closer and sitting on the edge of the bed.