Lost University (BOOK 2)

3: Agony

TITAN

"Sir tama na 'yan. Ipinagbabawal na sayo ang alak." biglang nag-iinit ang ulo ko dahil sa pangingialam niya sa akin. I only drank once, and it was only because of a problem I had been carrying for a long time.

"Ano bang alam mo?"

"Pero sir-"

"Pwede ba? Even now you will disappear from my sight!" biglang nagdilim ang paningin ko kaya hinampas ko siya ng arnis na dinampot ko mula sa table ni dadyy. "Take that look away from me! Do you know how angry I am with that face!"

"Titan!" I clenched my fists because of grandpa's loud voice. "What are you doing to your staff?"

"Not now, lolo." I squeezed my sinuses because of its extreme pain. Anyway, when did I not have a headache? I am used to it since then, as well as my heart, it is used to the pain i will carrying.

"Ilang beses na tayong nagpapalit-palit ng bodyguards dahil palagi mo silang sinasaktan! Ilang taon na ang nakalipas, Titan! Akala ko ba okay kana!"

"Okay? How can I be okay lolo? I don't want to come home because I don't want to remember my past! But you brought me here and even sent me to the school owned by dad." I just can't accept this situation. I haven't even overcome my suffering before, it will increase again.

"Anong problema dun? Taga-pagmana ka, Titan. All your father's treasures are named after you!"

Bigla akong natawa sa pinagsasabi niya. Kaya naman pala. Kaya naman pala pinapauwi niya ako dito dahil lang pala diyan sa sinasabi niyang kayamanan. Wala nang iba, wala na Titan.

"Minsan ba 'lo, iniisip niyo ba ang nararamdaman ko? Natanong niyo ba ako kung gusto ko ba 'yang kayamanan niyo?"

"Titan, patay na ang daddy mo! Ikaw nalang ang natitirang tagapagmana niya."

"Then send Pyry home! I'm not the only child of the Evans!" ano mang oras mag-iiba na naman ang mararamdaman ko. Kapag ganitong sitwasyon hindi ko mapipigilan ang mararamdaman ko. Yung pakiramdam na hindi ako mahihimasmasan kapag hindi ako nakakapanakit ng tao.

Tiningnan niya ako na parang hindi makapaniwala sa narinig. "Anak lang siya ng daddy mo sa labas."

"He's still Evan! Daddy's blood runs in his veins! Huwag niyo siyang tanggalan ng karapatan!"

Umiiling siya, kaya alam kong hindi siya sang-ayon sa sinasabi ko. "Fix yourself, Titan! Forget the past! Forget about whoever is still bothering you!"

"Do you know the feeling that you see the person you love so much, but you can't approach her or even introduce yourself to her because you're afraid that she'll be ruined again? Alam mo ba ang ganun na pakiramdam, lolo?" I suddenly feel angry because of what he said, because of what he shows me. I know he cares about me, but as a grandchild, he doesn't really care how I feel.

"Hindi ang nararamdaman ang importante dito, Titan! Asikasuhin mo kung paano mo i-handle ang sarili mo sa ano mang bagay! Umayos ka Titan! Ako nalang ang natitira mong pamilya."

Tumawa ako ng pagak. "Don't forget that Pyry is your grandson. Pyry is my brother, and that is fvcking truth! There's a three of us."

Umiiling siya bago umalis sa harapan ko.
Pabagsak akong umupo sa swivel chair at hinilot ulit ang sentido ko. Mas lalo lang itong sumakit dahil sa sagutan namin ni lolo. This is the first time. It was the first time I talked back to him because my head was just heating up.

Inaasahan kona na ganito ang mangyayari. I just can't accept to myself that I can't just get close to her. I can see her, but only from a distance. It's hard to control myself, and it's even harder to assume I'm someone else in front of her. Ever since Pyry and I spoke, I have lost all hope in life.