The Upside of Falling || Karlnap

11

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I woke up with a bad headache and a strain in my leg. When I opened my eyes I saw the sun shining down on my covers and my torso. Then I saw someone next to me. I jumped a little before I realized it was just Nick.

I clumsily leaned over in bed and grabbed my phone, almost knocking a lamp and empty cup off of the table.

It was eleven am. I sighed and sat up, the movement waking up Nick. "Good morning." I said quietly, reaching over and running a hand through his slightly messy hair.

He slowly moved around for a little, his eyes barely open but the sliver of it I could see was facing me. "Hi." He said in a raspy morning voice after a moment of silence where he was opening his eyes and taking in my room.

I felt his arm snake around my waist and pull me closer. I laid down again and kissed his nose, giving him a half smile. My head was killing me.

"Are you okay?" He asked, pulling the covers down a little bit to his hips.

I shook my head no and closed my eyes. "Do you need a doctor?" He added, this time worry lacing his tone. I heard him start getting up and I grabbed his arm, stopping him.

"I'm alright, just a headache and a pain in my leg. I don't need to go back there." I said, now opening my eyes and looking at his deeply concerned face.

"Are you completely sure? Like are you just saying that n-."

"Nick," I said, putting my hand on his bare knee. "I'm okay, calm down."

He laid down next to me again, this time more softly. "Where does your leg hurt?" He asked, kissing the top of my head.

"My whole right leg."

He looked at me with a unreadable expression, it looked like concern but it also looked like sadness and love.

"I just need to take my meds." I said, trying to be reassuring. I got up slowly and I got dizzy, forcing myself to sit back down again.

"I think you should go to th-."

"I don't need the doctors, I'm fine." I interrupted.

"Baby, please, I'm just trying to do what's best for you."

"I promise, I'm okay."

After a moment of silence he said quietly. "I believe you."

"Great, now carry me to the kitchen."

He obeyed, picking me up by the back of my thighs and taking me to the kitchen where he set me on the counter. "Where are they?"

"Second cabinet to the right." I said, pointing in the general direction.

He found all the orange bottles and brought them to me along with a thing of water. "Thank you." I said with a little smile, pressing a kiss onto his lips.

"I'm going to get dressed." He said, looking down at his half naked self and laughing.

"Mmhmm." I hummed, starting to take the meds.

I felt even more dizzy after taking them. I slid off of the counter and stumbled to my room where a surprised Nick was putting on his shirt. "What's wrong." He asked, coming up to me as I ran a hand across my forehead.

"Dizzy." I whisper to him.

He scoops me into his arms again and walks out to the living room, setting me on the couch. "I'm getting your mom and then we are going to the doctors." He said sternly, already walking upstairs.

I groaned but didn't argue. I felt something rising up in my throat. For a minute I was confused but then I realized what was happening and stumbled my way to the bathroom, throwing up on the floor right in front of the toilet. My leg was in so much pain from walking quickly but my throat burned, like I had just screamed.

"Karl?" I heard Nick shout.

I threw up again, this time in the toilet. It was loud enough for Nick to hear I guess because he came bursting through the doorway, almost stepping in the vomit on the ground. I winced and pointed at the spot.

"Call an ambulance." I heard him say to my mom. Nick stepped over the spot on the ground and sat behind me, slowly rubbing circles onto my back.

I felt tears sting my eyes and then slowly trickle down my cheeks. Nick's hands moved so they were on my stomach, he lifted up my shirt a little and just rested his hands there. "Where does it hurt?"

I coughed for a minute. "My head, leg, and throat." I said, my voice raspy.

"Okay baby." He said quietly, hugging his hands around my stomach a little tighter.

The ambulance came a few minutes later, Nick wasn't aloud in and he told me that he'd just drive there. I didn't want him to leave. I cried the whole time in the back of the truck, my mom and a paramedic was trying to calm me down but I wouldn't.

A tube was put on my nose as soon as I got in a room, I was immediately out of it. I saw doctors all hovering over me and I saw my mom sitting in the corner, she looked tired. 

I wanted to tell everyone that I was sorry, I was sorry I wasn't normal and every few weeks I needed to be rushed to the hospital. I was so sorry that I was so needy and couldn't leave anyone alone. But most of all, I was sorry that I couldn't be in a relationship without fucking it up. I just lied to Nick.

My eyes started to close when I saw a black man walk through the door, he was tall, taller than anyone in the room and I recognized him as William. He scooped my mom up in his arms and hugged her for a long time, kissing her cheek every now and then. I made out the words "he's going to be okay" just before I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep.

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