The Fanfiction, MatsuHana

forty-four

Today, I saw an Interview with Mattsun. He acted just the way I expected him to act. He was still the same after all those years. 

What surprised me was the fact that he seemed to know my stories. Or at least one of them. I didn't think he would read them if he'd ever come across them. I was even more surprised when he complimented my style of writing. I have heard it of many others before but his opinion always mattered most to me. 

He was the sun of my life. The thing everything in my life revolved around. But just like the sun, he was far away and yet I craved him so much. Without him, I wouldn't be able to live anymore.

Kawa on the other hand was like electricity. It was very important to me and helped me in this shire endless period of a solar eclipse. He helped me through everything and was one thing I could rely on. It would hurt if he wasn't there anymore but I would be able to survive without him. He wasn't vital. Mattsun was. 

I knew it wasn't fair but that was how I felt. I felt guilty, yet, I knew that Kawa felt the same way about this other boy. We were just a replacement for the love of the life of the other. We both knew it and we both were fine with it.