"I don't want you to fucking apologise. I want the guilt to eat you alive. I want you to drown in your thoughts like I drowned in mine."
~~6 weeks is all it took for him to completely turn your world upside down.
But it wasn't even the right way up...
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"Y/N, I'm going now."
Peeking her head into your room, Maria was just saying a quick goodbye before she was heading out for the night... once again.
You weren't judging her for it of course. In fact you admired her stamina. She had continuous late nights dancing since the moment you had arrived, leaving you in the apartment all alone whilst she was out doing god knows what with god knows who.
But again, you're not judging.
But you had your own night to get ready for again. An evening by the pool with the drop dead gorgeous specimen known as Taehyung.
Just the thought of him had your body tingling. But you were quick to shoot down your lucid thoughts of the man. You scoffed at the thought of a man like him being interested in a woman like you. Plain Jane with a disastrous love life and an embarrassingly cheesy taste in music.
Speaking of which, as soon as you heard the front door to your apartment opening, you pushed your bluetooth speaker to it's limit, blasting music as loud as possible whilst you shimmied around your bedroom living for the moment as you applied the strongest sunscreen you could find. You had heard about the Miami sun being ruthless, and being a woman from the UK that only saw continuous sun in the 2 months of summer you were sometimes lucky to have in a year, you knew you would fry to a crisp just for even looking out of the window at the sun here, let alone sitting out in it.
As you bopped around your room to your music, you continued to apply your sunscreen to your bikini clad body, glad that going through what you did with Bobby at least did wonders for your body giving you the slimmest frame you'd had since you were a teen.
You were no longer shy of your body now that you had shed some weight, liking the fact that you still had curves in all the right places without the need to suck in your gut just for them to show.
Just as you finished with the sunscreen, the song you were listening to came right to your favourite part, the fact that you were home alone giving you the confidence to really let go and sing at the top of your lungs.
Grabbing your hairbrush from your vanity, you dropped to your knees at the pivotal moment, singing as hard as your lungs would allow letting yourself feel the lyrics.
"I'm always waiting on something other than this Why am I feelin' like there's something I missed... YEEEEEEEEEAAAAHHHHH!!! There's gotta be more to life... Than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me Cause the more that I'm... Tripping out thinking there must be more to life Well it's life, but I'm sure... there's gotta be more to life..."
Proud of yourself that you hit the high note during the 'yeah' ad-lib, you continued with your one man show, bringing the song to the perfect close with a contented sigh and a nod of approval as you clicked for the next song before you stood up and sauntered over to your wardrobe to grab a dress to cover up.
